


i know you because i can feel you

by dykejoon



Category: The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Gen, Just a Shit Ton of Rich People Doing Rich People Things, Link is Bad at Feelings, Link is Not a Fan, Link is a First Class Sergeant, Rhoam Hyrule is a Fucking Dick for Plot Reasons, Selectively Mute Link (Legend of Zelda), Sidon is a Good Friend, Urbosa is a Lesbian and also a Good Friend, Zelda is Bad at Feelings, Zelda is a Tech Company Heiress, i wrote these tags naked while listening to asmr probably forgot some, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-02
Updated: 2020-04-20
Packaged: 2020-10-05 19:11:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 44,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20493833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dykejoon/pseuds/dykejoon
Summary: Zelda Hyrule, although she was rich and famous and of course strikingly beautiful, was a woman Link figured he would avoid at a bar.





	1. the heiress and the sergeant

**Author's Note:**

> title taken from lyrics to wjsn’s ‘save me, save you’ one of my favorite songs of all time and really fitting for this story and zelink in general, english translations can be found on youtube, i seriously recommend a read and listen!!
> 
> helllllo my beauties!! my name is mag and ill be guiding you through my first piece of fanfiction in over four fucking years!!!! i just fell in love with breath of the wild at the same time i was reading the crazy rich asians trilogy, so this takes (cough steals) ideas from both!! its kind of like if you plopped all the races and characters into the real, modern world, thats the setting ive gone with, and im not sure if anyone will like it but me but whatever. using breath of the wild characters nd shit you know the drill. this is a really indulgent project of mine, a story written mostly for the author’s enjoyment, but i hope you can find joy in it too!! xoxo, mag
> 
> psssssst, im looking for a beta and also for anyone looking for a beta!! ill be more than happy to edit your stories in my free time!!

Ever since Zelda’s plane had touched down in Paris, she and her security detail, ladies in waiting and assistants had been experiencing heretofore unprecedented levels of sucking up.

It fucking annoyed Zelda, how these perfectly respectable people waited on her hand and foot like servants. Bootlickers, all of them, and it didn’t suit their status at all. Zelda Hyrule had been born into the lap of luxury suckling on a silver spoon and had known nothing else, but this was just… preposterous. 

As she nibbled halfheartedly at the lobster quesadilla she’d picked up at the lavish buffet table down in the ballroom before she had been swept up to her hotel room’s dressing room, her lady’s maid, Gisele, presented her with a long sleeved, plain Tom Ford backless gown-the dress her father had picked out for her specifically for this occasion. Its price barely nicked $5,000-unbecoming of the heiress, but Zelda knew it had been a deliberate choice on her father’s part. All the other ladies would know the sensible dress by sight alone-she’d be regarded as modest; the perfect, penny pinching blushing bride for their sons. They’d certainly relay the news to their husbands.

The idea, she supposed, was to showcase that if she looked that good in a plain white virgin dress, imagine how she would look in a $300,000 wedding gown, hanging silent and submissive off the arm of their hemming and hawing spawn, serene expression hidden under a floor length veil.

The heiress near snorted derisively at the thought as Gisele led her gently off the lounger and onto a podium in front of the full length mirror, so she could keep watch as her lady’s maids dressed her and brushed out her hair and cinched her corset until her lips were tinged blue and she gasped on the inhale and wheezed on the exhale.

The hotel’s eager, overzealous staff circled her like sharks, rubbing oils and lotions into her skin and spraying incense on her neck, underarms and thighs until she smelled like the gardens at the Northern Hyrule Estate in full bloom. Marionne, her second lady’s maid, ran a brief palm down her cheek in a feathery light touch as she painted the heiress’s lips a delicate peach. Zelda leaned quickly into the comforting, if not pitying, touch. Marionne and Gisele had been the ones to wipe her tears the past few nights as she wept for the incoming loss of her independence, and she knew better than to bat away the only familiar hands she would feel for the next six grueling hours.

The airy, white sleeves of her gown reminded her so much of those of her lab coat. She hadn’t been out in the field in weeks, and it was well and truly crippling her. She could practically feel her intelligence leaking out of her ears as each day outside of Purah’s laboratory in Hateno (the small servant’s quarters-turned-actual-town just outside the Eastern Hyrule Estate) dragged on. She even missed the little Hateno boy who, unaware of her status, would grind his scooter to a halt beside her as she walked, and invite her in to play Minecraft with him and his friends.

If he was asking now, she’d use her father’s top secret unreleased teleportation tech to whisk them both off to the quaint village, and play Minecraft for as long as the little fuckers wanted her to.

But alas, she turned 18 in three days time, and even in the 21st century, it was tradition that she marry a suitor of her father’s choosing-any man who attended was eligible, but it was highly unlikely 99.9% of the men who turned up would get even a second glance from her father-let alone even one from her. Zelda wasn’t interested in getting married, especially to the sorry excuse for a man Mr. Hyrule would undoubtedly choose for her. 

This was not about love, this was about status. Zelda knew that and it made her want to fucking die. The only thing worse than giving up her independence was giving up her independence to a husband who would turn her into a punching bag.

Zelda winced as Gisele tugged at her hair particularly hard with a fine toothed comb, waving away the woman’s quiet, quick apology. If only Urbosa were here, the woman would comb her fingers gently through her golden tresses to rid them of knots and use her feather light touch to twist a gorgeous braid down Zelda’s back, finishing with a ghostlike kiss to the top of Zelda’s head. Urbosa’s deft hands, although usually used for typing and kickboxing, were naturally attuned to deal with her hair, and had been since her mother had passed. Zelda sometimes wondered if her mother's final words to her closest friend on her deathbed had been her secrets to keeping Zelda’s hair knotted proper and tidy.

“I think your Zambian emerald necklace would look lovely with this dress, mistress,” Marionne remarked quietly as she threw Zelda’s hair over her collarbone, shattering the melancholy silence that had settled over the room. “Mr. Hyrule did not expressly forbid jewelry from your personal collection, and did not leave a piece he picked out himself.”

“The one that matches my eyes?” Zelda responded airily, trying not to sound too agitated. She hated when her helpers called her ‘mistress’, but it was a rule of her father’s. One of many that made Zelda feel like a witch.

Marionne turned back to her sleek leather luggage, pulling out a tiny blue box, opening it and presenting the sizable, but not overly obnoxious, emerald pendant to the heiress. “Yes, mistress. $95,000, set in gold.”

Zelda stepped down from the podium to cup the hanging pendant in her delicately manicured hands. She smirked, just so, at the thought of ruining her modest look with a precious stone the size of a half dollar dangling from her neck, sparkling the same color as her grass green eyes. “A bit pricey for the occasion, hmm?” She hummed, but she continued before Marionne could take this as a rejection and apologize frantically. “It’s perfect, Marionne. You’re a sightseer when it comes to pairing jewelry-and finding loopholes that won’t get either of us in trouble.” The lady’s maid smiled graciously at her mistress, cheeks tinged pink, as she clasped the necklace around Zelda’s elegant neck, adjusting the pendant to lay perfectly in the divot of her collarbone.

“You look stunning, mistress,” Gisele remarked as Zelda smoothed out her dress and turned around to admire her naked back, slim and spotless, save for splatterings of freckles and the occasional dainty mole that not even the most expensive skin produces could remove. 

Zelda huffed lightly. “I wish the circumstances were different.”

“...So do we, mistress.”

<>

“-Rhoam Hyrule is one of the richest men in the world, Link, and you’re going to be trailing his daughter all week, and you’re not freaking the fuck out. I just don’t get how,” Beedle remarked as the two men walked quickly down the Champs-Élysées. Link’s shoulder cracked into a young woman’s, and she gave him a nasty look before he could even think to apologize, cursing him in French under her breath.

Link shrugged. “I just don’t get how this is different than any other security job.” His voice was scratchy from lack of use, but he owed his old friend vocal responses after so many months apart.

Beedle slapped his friend’s broad shoulder, looking affronted. “You don’t get how getting called in from New York, getting a paid flight to Paris, getting the hottest invite in town, so you can trail the heiress to Hyrule Tech for a week as undeserving men throw themselves at her, is a huge-ass deal. And the only man allowed to get within three feet of her without getting shot, is you,’ Beedle waggled his eyebrows suggestively. “Tonight seems like your chance to strike it big rich, Linky! Like, China rich. Bill Gates rich.”

Link decided he would be offended on the heiress’s behalf, although he hadn’t met her yet. “Her father would have me shot, killed and disposed of. Besides, Miss Hyrule wouldn’t be caught dead with the temporary head of her security detail. Not to mention I’m not interested. At all.”

Beedle snickered. “The only women who aren’t attracted to you are the ones that don’t like men at all, Linky. You’re actual hot shit.”

Link raised an eyebrow. “Are you implying Miss Hyrule is a lesbian?”

Beedle raised his own challenging eyebrow. “You got a problem with that?”

Okay, now Link was offended for himself. “How fucking dare you imply I’m a bigot. I’m the god of lesbians.”

Zelda Hyrule, although she was rich and famous and of course strikingly beautiful, was a woman Link figured he would avoid at a bar. This was just his first impression, though. His first interaction with the bejeweled spitfire would be tonight, when Rhoam Hyrule (a man to whom he had pledged his loyalty for the stiff price of $5,000 a day) introduced him to her as the head of her security detail for her stay in Paris. Mr. Hyrule had hinted, however, that if Link impressed the founder of Hyrule Tech, he may be offered a full time position.

Link frowned slightly as Beedle continued to chatter on beside him. That’s where the problem came in. Miss Zelda was notorious for ditching the shit out of her bodyguards. She’d thoroughly convinced her independent, stubborn self that she was in no apparent danger and could cover her own ass should the need arise.

This notion, of course, was utter bullshit and the daydreamings of a spitfire who refused to allow herself to depend on anyone else. Only a few bodyguards in her inner circle kept the job out of loyalty to her father; the rest were fired or quit within months, due to their inability to keep up with the heiress when she slipped underneath their arms.

That would not be Link. If that posh-accented woman thought she could outrun a first class sergeant fresh from Iraq she had another thing coming.

The thing was, Link desperately needed the job Rhoam Hyrule was offering. Ever since he waved the army goodbye, he’d been feeling rather lost. He was a military brat, through and through, the son and grandson of high-ranking generals. He knew nothing else but guns and knives and crossbows and how to use them, how to cross a field or sprint down a hallway undetected. He hadn’t been to college and he had no skills other than cooking, and where was that going to get him? He figured nowhere his father would deem respectable. Only a few months to a year with the job Mr. Hyrule was hinting at would pay for a comfortable life. He could settle down, find a girl, raise some children under the Greene name, and rejoin the military when he felt less… unsure.

His old friend Beedle had been running a small chain of jewelry stores in Paris since the two had graduated high school, Beedle only a year before him, to fund his junkie ways. In a pinch, Beedle would buy anything from you, even if it wasn’t a precious jewel-he was a bit of a hoarder. He’d become quite respected in the jewelry business, with a number of rich and famous clients. Link was so turned around about life these days he was tempted to join him, though he knew dick shit about jewels and had never even seen marijuana in person. 

Link was due to be at Miss Hyrule’s side an hour before the ball started to be introduced to the heiress and briefed on his responsibilities and where he should take caution. That was in three hour’s time, but he and Beedle had run out of things to do in Paris and were already meandering towards the hotel venue that was hosting the Hyrules that week.

Despite his confidence that Miss Hyrule wouldn’t be able to outsmart him, Link’s heart thumped nervously in his chest at the thought of so many important people gathered in one place, with him in charge of defending arguably the most important.

<>

“Zelly!”

Zelda whipped her head around just as Sidon’s finned arms crushed her into his towering frame, startling Zelda’s bodyguards out of their stupor. She used her free hand to agitatedly wave them off (weren’t they supposedly trained to recognize her friends?) as the other wrapped securely around the Zora’s back and patted firmly in reply to his bone cracking squeeze. “Hello, Sidon. It’s been quite a while. Where’s Mipha?” She and her fellow heiress had never been particularly close, but as isolated teenagers not permitted to form bonds with many, they always treated each other as lifelong friends, showcasing their jewelry collections and painting each other’s nails and trading juicy gossip whenever their paths crossed. She and Sidon, on the other hand, kept in contact through text throughout the year. The younger brother was the more magnetic and nagging of the two siblings, although they were both sweet as candy.

“She’s with my dad and Mr. Hyrule, talking about whatever-the-fuck she found to talk about with two old farts,” Zelda giggled into her palm, and Sidon grinned, straightening his crimson tie. “May I say, you look absolutely ravishing tonight, Zelda. The necklace is a gorgeous touch.” He prodded her in the side with a sharp, blood red nail, chuckling. He obviously recognized her plot to ruin her modest dress with expensive drip.

“Thank you. It was all my helper’s idea. A loophole in my father’s plans, you see. He left no jewelry but didn’t expressly forbid its use.”

Sidon looked over her shoulder to eye her father. “Has he seen you yet?”

Zelda scoffed, irritatedly brushing a stray lock of hair behind her ear. “For now he’s far too busy assuring the arrival of my head of security for this visit to Paris. I heard from those gossipy butlers of my father’s that he’s a sergeant fresh from Iraq. I’m surprised father didn’t rent out the secret service.”

Sidon laughed, taking a flute of champagne from a passing tray and handing it off to Zelda. She murmured her thanks. The Zora was certainly a charmer, and if she had any say in any man here as her suitor, he’d be her number one pick. Unfortunately for her, Sidon was gay and simply accompanied his family to these sorts of events for the drama (and to see her, of course). “What’s your plan for slithering away from this one?”

“I should easily be able to get him off my trail by walking into the crowd tonight. He won’t last fifteen minutes if all goes as I think it will.”

“You sure are confident you’ll be able to outsmart a first class army sergeant,” Sidon chortled, taking the flute back from Zelda and downing the remaining liquid in a single gulp. “Good luck, sweet girl, all I can say is good luck.” 

Zelda’s phone buzzed. Her father.

Father: Come see me, darling, there’s someone here I’d like you to meet.

No doubt it was her new head of security. She excused herself from Sidon’s company rather regretfully, but the Zora waved her off with a teasing ‘go meet your new mans’ that Zelda saw little humor in.


	2. oh no it all went wrong

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> was writing all day to get this out!! thank you so much for the lovely comments and kudos, they made my heart glow and i just had to get another longer chapter out for you!! was going to try to hit 10000 words but i dove for the ball at a volleyball game and got run the fuck over so im really down for the count so enjoy the unbeta'd whatever the fuck.
> 
> hylian’s elf ears can move up and down at a 90 degree angle and turn towards sound and flick in response to stimuli fucking fight me
> 
> tw!! brief mention of physical abuse!!

Mr. Hyrule had barely sent off the text to his daughter before she floated to his side, looking up at him expectantly with an unmistakably bored, long-suffering gaze. Link could already tell he and this girl were going to get off on the wrong foot-no matter how he presented himself. He wished he’d been hired by Dolan Dorephan instead-he’d met Mipha, and she was kind and gentle and seemingly overjoyed to make his acquaintance.

Mr. Hyrule cleared his throat, wrapping an arm around Zelda’s waist and tugging her closer to his side, gesturing with the other hand towards Link. “Zelda, this is your new head of security, Sergeant Link Greene. Sergeant Greene, this is my daughter, Zelda, your charge.”

Link bowed shortly, catching sight of Miss Hyrule’s brief grimace as he came back up, despite how quickly she wiped it off her face. She shot him a tight smile. “A true pleasure, Sergeant Greene. I’m sure we’ll get along… splendidly.”

Link saw through her pleasantries in a second, and judging by the look on Mr. Hyrule’s face, he did too. After all, he was the one who had replaced her heads of security every month for the past five years. “Now, Sergeant Greene doesn’t speak much, darling, so I expect you to cooperate even with his nonverbal commands. And please, be nice.”

“Yes, father. Come now, Sergeant, I’ll introduce you to my friends and we can chat a bit,” Zelda set off at a brisk pace, not even checking to assure Link was following her. She was already trying to lose him in the crowd-but Link was smarter than that, keeping up two steps behind as she zigzagged through the crowd, lightning fast despite her six inch dagger heels.

He heard Mr. Hyrule sigh audibly in their wake.

Zelda whipped her head around so quickly Link got hit in the face with a spray of garden scented golden hair. The heiress didn’t apologize, although she undoubtedly noticed. “My friends Sidon and Mipha are just ahead. Are you comfortable making conversation?” Link shook his head no.

“Alright then. I’ll go see them, perhaps you can grab something to eat or drink, and we’ll meet back up.” It was a clear dismissal (to give her an opening to run away with her friends, no doubt), but one Link refused to take. He shook his head again, mouthing a curt ‘not hungry’.

Zelda blinked.

Link blinked back.

“Alright then,” She cleared her throat, walking towards her friends once more, Link hot on her heels. Sidon grinned as the pair got closer, nudging his sister. 

“Heyyy! It’s the princess and her newly appointed knight! How’s it going, man? I’m Sidon, this is my sister Mipha. It’s good to meet you! How’s life treating you? How’s Zelda treating you?” The Zora clapped him on the shoulder. Mipha simply smiled at him, gentle and graceful. 

Link hesitated at Sidon’s long line of verbal questioning. It’d take him ages to type out a reply to that-the long pause between question and answer would be painfully awkward. His rescue came in the form of Mipha, who touched her brother’s arm. “Link is mute, Sidon. Let’s slow down a bit.”

Link found himself not minding that Mipha had granted herself permission to address him without his title so soon after meeting him, something only his friends and Starbucks baristas had permission to do.

Sidon swiftly nodded his understanding with a sharp ‘ah!’, grinning at Link. “My apologies. Let’s start over, Sergeant. Hi, I’m Sidon Dorephan. Lovely to meet you.” He extended a fin. Link smiled and nodded, grasping it in a firm shake. 

He stepped back, allowing his charge to step in and hold an actual two sided conversation with the siblings. He gazed around at the buzzing ballroom, soaring ceilings and walls covered in beautiful azure tiles. He felt vaguely like he was underwater. The loud murmur of chatter around Link reminded him of when his parents would host parties for their army friends that he wasn’t allowed to attend, gazing down on the throngs of adults in the living room through the banisters on the stairs, his skin prickling at the sight of so many unfamiliar people in his home so late at night.

A bustling waiter carrying a tray stacked high with glasses of varying alcoholic drinks bumbled past him, and Miss Hyrule plucked a drink from the very top, glancing down at it absentmindedly as she swirled it around, then stuck the tip of her long pink painted pinky nail into the frothing liquid. Link furrowed his brows, confused. Her hand was undoubtedly germy, and here she was sticking it into her drink. The heiress mouthed to fifteen, looking bored, and then nodded in satisfaction, taking her pinky out and sipping lightly. She caught Link staring at her and she smiled wickedly. “If the drink has been tampered with, my nail polish will turn black. A useful creation by a rightfully paranoid female inventor, wouldn’t you say, Sergeant?” 

Link nodded, suddenly overwhelmingly curious-how unexpectedly clever of her. “Here, inspect for yourself,” She thrust her hand into his face, wiggling her fingers impatiently when he didn’t immediately grasp it. The heiress giggled rather loudly when he finally took her hand into his own, grinning broadly. Her green eyes sparkled with mirth and her cheeks burned a pretty shade of pink. Now that Link thought about it, Miss Hyrule had been knocking back drinks ever since they’d been introduced-she was undoubtedly coming undone.

Miss Hyrule’s hand was soft and thin, just as lovely as the rest of her, his own hand twice, maybe even three times as large, rough with callouses and scars. Hers looked as though she’d never done a day of hard labor in her life. However, on the inside of her thumb and pointer finger was a rough patch, rubbed raw where pens and pencils scraped against her skin from hours of writing. He tapped it with his thumb, and Miss Hyrule responded as though she was an audio button in an art museum. “I was sent to a very prestigious girls school in London, we had to hand write all of our assignments-even twenty page essays. If you made an error, you were forced to start over. I spent years at that school writing until my fingers cramped so badly I couldn’t move them and I had sores so big I couldn’t pick things up. Saturday detention if we didn’t speak impeccable British English with the correct accent. A true nightmare.”

So that was where she’d gotten her accent, bright and lilting and posh despite the Hyrules not being based in Europe. Link let go of her hand, and it flopped uselessly to her side as she downed the rest of her drink. She set the glass down on a nearby table and gestured over her shoulder at Link, swaying slightly as she made for one of the side doors. “This room’s getting quite stuffy, wouldn’t you say, darling? Come, let’s get some fresh air.” Link had no choice but to follow her out of the grand oak double doors onto the balcony, deciding to ignore the ‘darling’, despite how it made the tips of his pointed ears flush-Miss Hyrule wasn’t in the proper state of mind.

The balcony was deserted-Paris grew chilly at night, and it was well past ten o’clock. Miss Hyrule leaned against the railing, staring at the Eiffel Tower, glowing resolutely against the darkened skyline. Link took his place a few paces behind her as she gazed up at the few stars that were visible above the City of Lights.

“You know, Sergeant, you are the youngest person my father has ever hired to mind me,” She spat out the word ‘mind’ like it physically pained her to do so. “Closest to my age anyone has ever gotten. And your military record, quite impressive. I had a quick look into your files, hope you don’t mind,” She picked at her cuticles as she turned to face him, gentle features twisted sourly. “You’re far younger than most of the men here who have come to face my father in hopes of courting me-but it is no act of love or desire. It is out of greed, a want of access to my father’s fortune, to strengthen their own family tree with the Hyrule name. Many are in their thirties, forties even. They all nauseate me.” She yanked her hair out of its intricate crown braid, and it fell, fluffy and loose and tangled around her face. She was getting more wound up in her drunkenness, and Link feared she would soon become inconsolable-but he had no idea how to comfort her. He reached for her, perhaps to squeeze her shoulder, or maybe stroke his hand once over her hair, he’d figure it out when he got there-but she backed up out of his reach, becoming visibly more agitated.

“Those snot nosed men combined with you signal the final death of the last of my independence, Sergeant. I know I cannot outrun you-just like I cannot outrun the life my father has set up for me. But I have to try. I won’t lay myself down and accept what I do not wish to. If you ever choose to speak to me, I have but one request for those words. You will not address me the way my father orders everyone else to. You won’t call me mistress, or heiress, or Miss Hyrule, or whatever other bullshit,” By this point, the heiress was nearing tears, and her voice wobbled with sadness and fury. “You will call me Zelda, and that is not a request, that is an order. If you must be chained to me, and I to you, you would do well to at least just call me Zelda.”

Link swallowed as he made a decision. “Okay, Zelda, as you wish. It’s alright. You’re okay.” His voice was rough, quiet and scratchy, but she heard him all the same. He reached for her again, and she sobbed openly, dropping her cheek into the palm of his hand, five thin fingers wrapping around his wrist. God, if anyone walked out and saw the heiress unintentionally wiping her runny nose on the leather of his gloves as she drunkenly weeped, he’d be fired on the spot for sure. He shushed her softly and she cried harder. “Zelda. Hey, it’s okay, let it out, you’re okay,” 

“The only people who have ever called me Zelda are my father, Lady Urbosa and Sidon. I h-hardly even recognize it as my name anymore,” She hiccuped, the tips of her ears flicking when he accidentally brushed her earlobe with the tip of his thumb as he swiped away a stray tear.

“Zelda. Zelda. Zelda Zelda Zelda. Zelda,” He whispered her name over and over, and she clapped a hand over her mouth to mask her wails. “Zelda. Zel.”

“Sergeant,” She sobbed through her fingers.

“Here, we’ll make a deal, okay? Just between you and me. Behind closed doors, I will call you Zelda, and you will call me Link. It’ll be like our secret, okay? So we never forget our own names as you fear you will.”

Zelda nodded quickly. A sealed deal. “Link,”

“Zelda.”

“Link.”

“Zelda.”

She tugged her face out of his grip, and he released her. She drew in a deep, shaky breath, releasing it in an exhausted puff of a laugh. “Thank the goddess I wore waterproof mascara. Fuck, I’m a wreck,” She yanked her fingers through her hair, tugging through knots and tangles leftover from her ruined hairstyle. Link winced at the sound of her hair ripping. Once she was satisfied, she turned sharply back to her guard. “Although this was a touching gesture on your part, Sergeant, you’d be wrong to assume this changes how I view you. I’m not free, with you trailing me. I hope my intentions are clear-I won’t stop until I’m rid of you.”

Link stared at her, face hard, brows furrowed. “And I won’t stop until I’m satisfied I’ve protected you with my life. My mission begins and ends with you, but you’re mistaken if you think my mission will be ended by you. You’re my charge, not my enemy.”

Zelda glared at him, a strangely captivating fire in every twitch of every muscle. “I will treat you as mine, then, Sergeant.” She turned on her heel and began to stomp back into the crowded ballroom. Link didn’t hesitate to follow.

His beautiful charge still looked radiant, although the ruffled dress, reddened eyes and streaky makeup dimmed her glow. She took a hard right rather than rejoin the party, stomping up a velvety staircase. “I must go back to my ladies maids and freshen up. Father would have both of our heads if I appeared before a crowd in this state,” She kicked off her shoes, walking backwards briefly to toss them into Link’s arms. “Hold these, darling. Don’t drop them, now, they cost more than a healthy human heart on the black market.” 

What a princess, he thought bitterly as Zelda picked up her skirts so she could walk faster down the hallway, tucking the shoes carelessly underneath his arm as he quickened his pace. He didn’t understand how these plain fucking white heels were so expensive when he’d seen a near identical pair in the shoe section at Target last week for $11.99.

His princess stopped at the door furthest down the hallway, scanning her keycard and turning the doorknob. “You may wait out here or come into the room with me and freshen up yourself, if you deem it necessary. However, my ladies maids will protect my honor and chastity with their lives should it come down to it, so do try not to take a peek.” She turned her nose up as she opened the door to the dismayed gasps of her ladies maids, who rushed to her side in a flurry, demanding to know what string of events brought her to such a state of appearance. Link resisted the urge to roll his eyes as he followed the three inside.

“It doesn’t matter how I came to look this way. What matters is that it must be corrected as quickly as possible. No doubt my absence has already been noted. Gisele, Marionne, this is my guard, Sergeant Link Greene. Link, these are my ladies, Gisele and Marionne.” 

The two women bowed quickly at him. “Hello, Master Link. We are at your service,” They hummed in haunting unison. Link smiled thinly.

“Link, do what you will while I get freshened up, but for the love of goddess, please at least wash your gloves.”

<>

Zelda could sense her ladies maid’s questions before they were even voiced as they led her by the hands to a private changing area, leaving the Sergeant to plod around the room and explore-and wash his gloves, if he knew what was good for him. The women knew better than to pry with her, but no doubt they’d scurry back to the rest of her staff to fill them in on her studly, silent new guard and their mistress’s disheveled state when she returned to her room with him.

Gisele stripped Zelda down to quickly iron her dress out as Marionne ran a brush through her hair. She turned one ear towards the door, listening for Link’s footsteps outside. They seemed to be going in a small circle just on the other side-he had dutifully taken post. “Wash your gloves!” She barked.

There was a long sigh, and the steps retreated towards the kitchen sink. Running water could be heard soon after. Zelda’s ear flicked back with satisfaction. “Before you go to the rest of staff with your gossip-oh, stop with the terrified looks, you’re barely older than I am, I know you talk-my appearance has nothing to do with the Sergeant. I got a bit upset out on the balcony and I’m a touch intoxicated, is all. Additionally, please note for future encounters that Sergeant Greene is selectively mute, and will not respond to you verbally unless he feels fully comfortable and safe, with both you and his surroundings. The Sergeant should never be demanded to speak, understand?”

“Of course, Mistress.” “Master Link’s wishes will be honored.”

She let out a breath as Gisele zipped her dress back up and her hair was freed of Marionne’s hands. “The Sergeant has my shoes. I’ve no idea what he did with them. Where is the rest of my security detail?” Marionne mumbled something into her earpiece (Zelda personally thought the fact that even her ladies had to wear earpieces was stupid, but whatever), then nodded.

“Master Hyrule sent them to take post outside at all entrances that may make you vulnerable, as members of the Yiga have been spotted some blocks away from the hotel, and no doubt they know of the gala tonight. He has been made aware that you are still with Master Link and trusts Master Link with your safety. Master Hyrule has inquired about your presence.” She reported back, most likely verbatim of the report that had been read out to her.

Goddess, Zelda fucking hated the Yiga. Usually more of a nuisance than a danger, they seemed hellbent on the Hyrule’s demise, for whatever reason. Their intentions were unclear most of the time, and usually they just liked to stir things up, but her father still considered them to be a terrorist cult. They were half the reason she needed such an expansive security detail. “Tell father my dress got a bit messed up and Sergeant Greene accompanied me back to my room to right it.”

Marionne repeated this information, then waited quietly. Her eyes suddenly widened. “Master Hyrule has ordered that you and Master Link stay in the room. We have reason to believe the Yiga have infiltrated this event. We are going on black lockdown.”

Zelda resisted the urge to groan. Black lockdown meant the gala would continue as normal so as not to startle guests, except with ten thousand-billion more security agents and her getting quarantined. The ‘reason to believe’ was probably her father witnessing a Hylian guests’ sneeze being suspiciously high pitched. As far as the public knew, this was a fashion event. They had no reason to lurk. 

Link’s rapidfire knocks on the door meant he had gotten the message too. She opened the door mid knock and Link’s balled fist near hit her in the face. She caught it and shoved it back at him, only half jokingly. “Careful, soldier.” Link seemed to sag in relief at the sight of her. He had a handgun in his left hand, and when she made to sit on the couch to browse her phone, he stood in front of her, the gun pointed at the ground as he crossed his arms against his chest, ears flicking agitatedly at every sound the rest of the Hyrule staff made as they bustled around the spacious hotel room. His eyes were sharp and fierce.

She leaned forward and ran a brief hand along his arm, the muscles stiffening at the touch. He was uncomfortable, she’d made him uncomfortable. Damn it, Zelda. She retracted her hand quickly, clearing her throat. “Relax. It’s probably no more than a false alarm. Yiga are usually harmless fools. 99 times out of 100.”

“You can never be too prepared for the one,” Link murmured back, gaze never breaking from its continuous 180 degree path about the room. She huffed, flopping back down against the back of the couch. There would be no running from Link tonight, not during a lockdown. She shot a text off to Sidon.

Me: You were right. We’re on black lockdown jfc. I’ll never be able to get away from new guard.

Sidon: o shit we in danger?

Sidon: but haha piss ant i fuckign told u

Me: >:( Never call me a piss ant again

Sidon: read my fucking lips biss

Sidon: piss. ant. 

Me: Die

Sidon: haha yeah 

Sidon: im not saying get more drunk and have sex with ur hot ass new head of security but thats exactly what im saying

Me: You’re a true degenerate. Bye Sidon. Keep Mipha and your father close in case you must leave in a hurry.

Sidon: if ur not gna do it i fucking will. a meal, laid out in fuckin front of u. paid to be around u and b ur studly knight in shining armor. MEAL. EAT

Zelda promptly left him on read. No doubt she’d get shit for that later. Her father had probably nailed down a handful of potential grooms already, the gala was as good as over anyways. Her heart sank. All this… excitement with Link had distracted her from the purpose of tonight. She was supposed to be chatting up the mothers and fathers of the men who had been invited, being the perfectly postured, immaculately dressed, stunning socialite she had been raised to be since birth. Instead, she’d gotten piss drunk, ran out to the deserted balcony and snot cried into the hand of her brand new, non potential suitor, bodyguard.

God, her father had given no external signs of being angry, but she knew he would be fuming the next time they had a moment alone. Zelda wouldn’t be surprised if she got struck across the face for this. Abuse at her father’s hand had been the norm since her mother had passed, but he did it behind closed doors, where she had nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, and no one to turn to. She’d just learned to accept his occasional taps and slaps, taking secret photos of her cuts and bruises and tucking them away.

A door slammed particularly loudly, and Link shifted closer to her, gun changing positions in his grip. She drew a bit closer to him as well, and her hand reached up to grasp the back of his suit jacket. Instinct, she told herself, a simple reaction to his own, her body preparing her to be in danger and subsequently defended.

Yes, that was what it was.


	3. the darlings continue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alexa play dinner and diatribes by hozier and then only human by the jonas brothers immediately after and youve got this chapter. like you dont even have to read it
> 
> theyre falling into like in the city of love sidon and mipha are also there zelda gets engaged and rhoam can suck my lady balls
> 
> this kinda late if u go by my unofficial posting schedule but i had a weird ass weekend so forgive me

His princess snoozed on the couch behind Link as he diligently kept post. The party had ended hours ago, as had the lockdown code, but he wasn’t that stellar at sleeping anyway. Jetlag made it worse. Beedle had been his only company besides Zelda throughout the night (she drifted in and out of sleep-he guessed her profound sorrow regarding her looming engagement had her sleeping fitfully), the man had been texting him occasionally about his stoned 3am broodings. Beedle would never allow Link to forget how fucking weird he was. 

He’d tried to get Zelda to go off to sleep in a warm, soft bed the first few times she’d roused, but she’d irritatedly batted his hands away, mumbling something about him being ‘fucking annoying’, so he’d abandoned that idea quite quickly. The hotel room was dead silent, the television his fellow guards had been browsing after they had been dismissed from their posts muted and fuzzy, Zelda’s maids having retired hours ago, when it became clear their mistress would not be getting properly ready for bed. His charge’s phone, which had been buzzing incessantly with texts from her friends, had finally gone mostly silent. It was dark besides the glow coming in from the window-much like in New York City, Paris never truly slept. Last Link had checked, it was around four in the morning; the staff would be awakening again soon to prepare for the Hyrule’s first full day in France.

He’d heard the staff whispering incredulously about him as they went about their nightly duties as if he didn’t have Hylian ears-he didn’t talk, except to Mistress; Mistress had returned to her room drunk, distressed and disheveled within twenty minutes of meeting him; Mistress had called him Link and not Sergeant, not once but three times; Mistress seemed mystified by him, and he by her-they glared, but (allegedly) with the eyes of people who had known the other for a hundred lifetimes at least. He was apparently handsome and mysterious, his silence telling a thousand or so stories, already the apple of some staff’s eyes, but there was already talk that he and Mistress must be soulmates (their Zodiac charts had been scrutinized by one of the Gerudo laundry girls-93% compatibility, according to the stars). 

No wonder gossip traveled fast up and down the Hyrule family and faculty chain-these people talked so damn loud. A security threat, if he’d ever heard one (and he had)-no doubt it’d compromise someone’s safety someday, if it hadn’t already. 

It was also notably strange that he stayed with Zelda overnight-even the heads of security retreated to their chambers when dusk fell, leaving the presumably comfortable and safe heiress to her own devices. Fuck, no wonder she ditched them so easily. They were hardly trying past bare minimum-at least by Link’s standards. To their credit, however, Zelda’s attitude didn’t exactly make people keen on protecting her or sacrificing their life to save hers at the drop of a hat. No one wants to die for a stone cold bitch who’d made it clear she’d step over or onto your cold dead body and be on her way if you were shot down defending her. After all, she’d told you it would be unnecessary, and look at you, following orders and obligation and doing it anyway. Fool.

He’d just have to form a bond with her then-there had to be a soft and gooey inside to that stone cold exterior-he’d seen glimpses of it tonight. Make her feel protected and safe, but not without her occasional free reign, make her trust and rely on him without her feeling like she’d lost her independence. It’d be a challenge, but he’d been to Iraq, so what the fuck ever. He could handle a bratty teenager.

He finally sat down at the foot of the couch, just next to Zelda’s feet, and his princess hummed, scooting a little closer in her sleep until her calves pressed against his back. She had no blanket, she was probably a tad cold. Link scanned the room and found nothing to cover her with. There was a slight shuffle in the other room, and a muffled yawn-one of his princess’ maids had awoken for the day. He rose and went to lightly tap on the door, and after a slight pause, the door cracked open to reveal Gisele, still in her nightgown, staring at him, incredulous. He pointed at Zelda, hoping it wasn’t too dark, and mouthed ‘blanket’ and ‘she’s cold’. 

Gisele stared at him for a moment, before nodding slowly and disappearing back into the room, returning with a woolen throw blanket, setting it into his waiting arms almost robotically. He nodded his thanks, and Gisele’s ears (far shorter than Zelda’s ridiculously long and almost floppy ones-it was an old legend that ear length had correlation to social status; the more prominent you were, the longer your ears would grow) folded back to pin against her hair-Hylian body language for fear, distrust, aggression, or trepidation. He eyed her curiously before turning back to Zelda, tossing the blanket over her and settling back with her calves against his shoulders, arms crossed and handgun retired.

Gisele and Marionne emerge from their room moments later, giving him sideways glances as they made their way to the heavy velvet curtains, working together to pull them open, letting the first traces of the sunrise filter in. His eyes followed them as they bustled around the room, tidying up and preparing to make breakfast. Crepes, it looked like. He hoped they had Nutella and wildberries. What a fucking crime if they didn’t. 

Zelda shifted behind him, and when he looked over his shoulder wide emerald eyes were staring back at him. “Good morning, Zelda,” Link whispered, hoping the ladies maids didn’t hear him.

She continued to stare. “You were there the whole fucking night.” It wasn’t a question, it was a statement. He nodded to confirm. She shook her head as she ran her hands through her hair and stretched.

“You’re a nutcase, darling. I’m putting you down for a nap today, after I-well, we, if I’m to be technical, do some exploring,” She rose while simultaneously pulling her hair into a low ponytail, and Link rose with her, absentmindedly tugging a rather large fuzz from the woolen blanket off of one of her locks. He saw Gisele and Marionne stiffen visibly in his peripheral-was he not supposed to touch her? He didn’t read anything like that in the papers he’d signed. Regardless, he quickly retracted his hand. “I’d prefer if we left before father sends for me-after the disaster I was last night, I’m sure he has a few choice words for me. Let’s avoid him for as long as possible, hmm?”

Link thinks he may be contractually obligated to not let Zelda avoid her father, but he keeps that thought to himself. He’s had the feeling she doesn’t give a shit about rules and guidelines. She definitely didn’t read terms of services.

She approached her ladies maids and gave both women two bisous on both cheeks, exchanging polite good mornings. She turned back to him, smiling wickedly. “I’m off to get changed, you should head off to your room to do the same before Gisele and Marionne finish breakfast. Dress comfortably, and get everything you need for today, we’re not to return tonight until we must. Wear running shoes, I’ll have you chasing like you’ve never chased before, darling soldier.”

Link didn’t doubt that. 

He hadn’t been to his hotel room since early yesterday morning, to get his things in order, but he’d already memorized the way to his room from about a dozen different locations, including his princess’ room. His phone suddenly blew up with texts from Beedle, who had apparently snapped out of his high and was now bombarding Link with questions. Among the texts that flashed along the screen were ‘how is it?’ ‘how r u?’ ‘whats she like?’ ‘is she actually hot or is her ig a lie. is she an ig thot link’ ‘have u gotten ass already clever boy and thats why ur not answering huh’.

He simply responded ‘ew. ill video chat you l8r. maybe visit the shop w princess if we run out of shit to do.’ and then turned his phone off. He loved Beedle as much as Beedle loved him, but Zelda wanted her posse to hustle this morning, and he wouldn’t be able to hustle if he got roped into Facetiming Beedle. He could practically hear Beedle’s indignant squawks at being brushed off in the Latin District from here. 

He wondered for a moment, as he grabbed a plain green tank top and ripped up jeans, if Sidon and Mipha would be joining them today. He hoped so, but he also dreaded being in the presence of more influential, at-risk people when he already had Zelda to look after. He’d been briefed on building exits and traveling; the guards would surround them as they walked out to protect Zelda from paparazzi and fanboys, and then disperse throughout the crowded streets, following the pair at close range and keeping tabs on all going on around them, invisible to the public eye. Link was the only guard who would walk with Zelda, and if the rest of security couldn’t reach them in time in the case of an emergency, he’d be the final and only defense. He’d never done such a high profile security job, and it was daunting. 

He wasn’t even sure if he was technically qualified to be doing this, but it was clear that Mr. Hyrule felt he was running out of options, with his heiress’ 18th birthday and legal adulthood fast approaching, he clearly feared he’d lose any of his remaining control of his daughter. Link threw his hair up in a bun with a rubber band, grabbed his sunglasses and a backpack, and headed back for the door.

He opened it just as Sidon was about to knock. The Zora blinked before grinning broadly. “Just the man I wanted to see! Zelda sent me to fetch you, said breakfast is ready. Come on, Mipha and I are joining you guys without a formal invitation.” 

Sidon chattered as the two made their way back to Zelda’s room, but he talked so fast that Link wouldn’t have been able to get a word in even if he wanted to, but he tried to nod at all the right moments. The hotel was bustling with staff emblazoned with the Hyrule family crest and glamorous patrons, some of which Link recognized from the gala last night. Sidon pointed to various men sprawled around the lobby, loudly pronouncing them a ‘no’ ‘hell no’ or ‘fuck no’ for Zelda’s hand, paying no mind as to whether or not the men he gestured to could hear him or not. Sidon was as vulgar as he was protective.

At last, they arrived at Zelda’s room, and the Zora slammed the length of his entire body against the door in lieu of knocking. Marionne answered, and allowed them in with a quick curtsy, murmuring something about crepes. Mipha smiled at him from the table, where Zelda was (gracefully, politely) talking her fellow heiress’ ear off. He could see why Zelda and Sidon got along so well.

She was dressed deceitfully frugally at first glance, in a plain white crop top that was undoubtedly $1,000 and ripped jeans adorned with various clearly Gucci-designed stitch patterns and a matching Gucci belt. Doc Martens adorned her tiny ass feet (he should know, she had wormed them up under his shirt to warm up her toes at the asscrack of dawn and then reared back and kicked him square in the spine when he’d yanked them back out by her ankles). Her hair was in the same crown braid as yesterday, and she wore no makeup except for a peachy eyeshadow and simple cat eye liner. She smiled that same wicked smile when she spotted him, eyeing his outfit and Nike tennis shoes approvingly, no doubt pleased that he had followed her directions to the letter. 

Sidon wrapped Mipha and Zelda in a crushing hug as a greeting, both women letting out giggles at his antics. One of Zelda’s ears, pressed against Sidon’s cheek, flicked back and forth once to pat his face affectionately. Mipha gave her little brother a peck on the forehead. 

It was the picture of platonic domestic bliss. Link suddenly felt like an intruder. 

Then, Zelda beckoned for him. “Sergeant, darling! Come here, come! I have something for you.” He cocked his head to the side, but obeyed. She presented him with a small black box, pressing it into his palm and impatiently gesturing for him to open it.

He did, and blinked at the sight of the watch inside. It was pure white with gold hands, minimalist but undeniably expensive. Little glass windows revealed the complicated gears inside. He took a liking to it instantly. “I won’t even tell you the price because I know you’ll reject it, but I thought it suited you-everyone on my personal staff receives a gift from me, it’s my rule.” There was another glimpse of the gooey interior he’d been searching for in her.

“Thank you, Mistress, it’s beautiful,” He spoke softly, but he felt the room pause. All across the dining area, silverware stopped scraping against plates, the quiet, six in the morning chatter between the other guards dwindling to nothing as everyone turned to look at him. Sidon hid a surprised hack in his elbow. He kept his gaze locked on Zelda, whose nose had crinkled up when he called her ‘mistress’, panic quickly setting in. She cleared her throat loudly, staring pointedly over her shoulder at the rest of her guard. They turned away quickly, but Link could see that the Hylians still had their ears pointed towards the head table.

“You’re quite welcome, Sergeant. Now, put it on, I want to make sure it fits right.” She shook it out of the box, setting it on the table, and grabbed Link’s wrist, fastening the butter soft white leather around it. The metal was pleasantly cool. She patted its face before releasing his hand, and they both admired his new possession for a moment as the rest of the room settled back into their breakfasts. 

Link dragged a chair over to sit a respectable distance from his princess as Gisele gingerly handed him a crepe, which he inspected. Wildberries and Nutella, hell to the fuck yeah. He smiled gratefully at her, but she merely turned away. Nevertheless, he was in heaven, delightedly munching at his breakfast as Sidon and Zelda planned her escape, Mipha chiming in with comments here and there about how no, pitching Zelda off that balcony into the Seine wouldn’t fucking work and yes, she would drown, and no, Sidon wasn’t allowed to swim her across the Seine, it was filthy, and yes, she was going to make them walk out of at least a few doors. No one at the head table mentioned his speaking, and he was grateful for it, relishing in just being able to chuckle quietly at the banter being thrown across the silk tablecloth, and that being enough of a contribution.

As soon as the clock struck 6:30, Zelda was practically vibrating out of her seat as she assured her lady’s maids were ready and tittered with the guards as they argued who would accompany her and her entourage. As the hands on Link’s watch crept towards 7:00, Zelda grew increasingly anxious, and it made Link jittery too. Mr. Hyrule was up and ready for the day by seven, and would undoubtedly be wanting to speak to her, the very event she had rallied her staff to avoid. They were breathlessly loyal to her, for all she put them through. Terrifyingly, despite the way she kind of bullied him, he was finding himself becoming breathlessly loyal too. Zelda was just… enchanting. She was being a bitch to him, sure, but an enchanting bitch. 

By 6:50, everything was finally ready, Zelda was near passing out, and the plan was simple.

They’d walk out the front entrance. Totally outside the box, insane even. Although admittedly it was a step below Sidon’s original plot to throw Zelda off the balcony and hope she hit water. 

Sergeant Link Greene and Miss Zelda Hyrule made quite the tourist pair, him looking borderline nomadic and sort of homeless (he also sported a fanny pack, for ‘haha funny dumb American tourist’ reasons) sans a beautiful watch, and her clearly an expensive and exotic beauty who had just popped in for a quick visit to one of the most beautiful cities in the world. He’d hoped they’d be able to blend in, but unfortunately both of them were just too fucking weird. 

He sensed this would be a pattern.

Mipha and Sidon, although the siblings couldn’t join them, accompanied the entourage to the front gates of the hotel to see them off. The two hugged them tightly, and Sidon smirked broadly at Link.

“So, brave knight, are you ready to kidnap a princess?”

Link nodded, after only brief hesitation.

<>

Paris never ceased to amaze Zelda. She adored every street and every shop and every restaurant, even the shitty tourist ones. Link bought one of the terrible overpriced IKEA sized bags from a sleazy street vendor through a clumsy Franglish exchange, Link mortified at having to speak and the vendor frustrated that this fucking American wouldn’t speak above a mumble. The bag was used to carry snacks. He was a glutton, no doubt about that, and it made a fondness Zelda wanted badly to kill off fizzle in her stomach. If she couldn’t finish something, she’d reach behind her and hand it off to Link, who would dutifully try to fit the entire thing in his mouth. Link was near silent almost the entire time, but his eyes sparkled with life and curiosity as he pointed out locations he and Zelda could take pictures of, and she bullied him into easily six dozen selfies. She resolutely ignored the barrage of calls from her father and turned her phone off when she wasn't snapping pictures. 

He made for fine company, which surprised her. She’d been bummed before, that Link chose only to divulge a few words every couple of hours, but she’d accepted it as just another vaguely magical part of his vaguely magical character. He made for a good wall to scream at, metaphorically speaking, and she unloaded her feelings onto him throughout the day. Everything she had to say about her father, her upcoming unwanted engagement, how she wasn’t permitted to go to college or properly pursue the sciences (her dream), how she longed to call Purah’s laboratory in Hateno her home (she’d made Link swear he’d accompany her there as soon as this trip was over so she could get back to her research), how much she missed Urbosa and her childhood nanny, Impa, who was now so frail that even her sharp as a whip personality could not keep her through overseas trips, and Impa’s granddaughter, Paya, who, although painfully shy, had become a close and loyal companion, as the girls were similar in age and often the only playmate the other had. Link nodded along and hummed in sympathy or disgruntlement when appropriate, and it was just what she needed-someone to just listen. 

She found herself slowly accepting fully that Link was just as if not more headstrong than her, and he’d most likely win her father’s favor and be around for months to come. An alliance was probably in the best interest of both of them, but alas, she was too stubborn to negotiate anything and he certainly wouldn’t be the one to start a dialogue and they were thus locked in a stalemate. They did exchange phone numbers, however. For security reasons.

They danced in a Latin quarter square with tourists and townspeople, and she held Link by the wrists and swung him around in wide circles like a sack of potatoes. She’d never seen him grin so broadly in her direction. She hoped she’d be able to coax it out of him again.

Although technically he was supposed to walk several paces behind her, as the sun set and they reluctantly made their way back to the hotel, she’d hooked her arm through his, making a quip about ‘staying close when twilight comes’, but really she was just desperate for the companionship as panic began to set in at the thought of facing her father. Mum had been just as much of a spitfire as she was, but Father had seen her as an equal-the same could not be said for Zelda. No doubt, she was in a great deal of trouble.

But she could not find herself to regret it, even when her father stared at her with hard eyes and dismissed Link curtly from her side. Zelda glanced at him, almost desperately, and he clearly felt caught between the two people he heeded to, but he only hesitated for a moment before bowing his head to both her father and herself and slipping out the door. 

“Sleep well, dear,” She called after him, her voice echoing throughout the empty, silent room, but the only reply she received was the creak of the door as he departed.

As she turned back to her father, she didn’t think she had ever felt so alone.

“You and the Sergeant seem to be cooperating with each other well. This would please me beyond measure, under any other set of behavior from you, daughter,” Rhoam remarked, and it would have come off as casual, were it not for the way he tapped his fingers against his nightstand. “The level of pure disrespect for my wishes for you and disregard for the future I want for you has never been more clear. As your eighteenth birthday approaches, I can only assume this is your last ditch effort for independence.”

Zelda gulped as her father stood, backing up several paces, but he came no closer. She dipped into a bow, nose nearly touching the ground, staring resolutely at the floor. Submission. She hated how she must look right now. “I-I was very emotionally distressed last night, Father, I lashed out and I rebelled and I was wrong. I was purposefully difficult towards my staff and the Sergeant, whose company I do enjoy greatly. I hope you can find it within your heart to forgive me, Father. I will do better next time. The girl at the gala… she wasn’t… she wasn’t me. I am ashamed, Father.” Lies. She wasn’t ashamed at all. She’d do it again. And again and again and again until her hands were washed of her father and she was incapable of feeling fear inflicted by his wrath. But for now, her hands shook as she pressed her palms into the carpet.

“Zelda, you fail to understand. There is no next time. You are to be married. I’ve chosen your husband, your time as a single woman is over. There is no next time, in that regard. You’ve made your final exit as a girl in this world; drunk, disheveled and quite feral, in the eyes of many, disappearing in the middle of a party thrown just for you. I have given you eighteen long years to grow up, my daughter. And now another man will make you, and turn you into what I failed to, the wife and heiress you were born to be. Your engagement has been announced to our family and friends, and will soon be announced to the public. An engagement ring is being chosen by the groom’s family as we speak.”

Zelda immediately began to cry. Her father nudged her head with his boot, knocking her forehead rather harshly into the ground, thundering quietly ‘none of that’. He kneeled to the ground next to her, taking her trembling face in his hands. Her features screwed up further, and she choked on a sob. He gestured to the clock on his nightstand. 12:06 A.M. “Oh, and darling, happy eighteenth birthday. It’s time to grow up, my dear.”

He promptly threw her out. Waiting outside was Link, who looked at her with clear alarm-the exchange between her and her father had been so quiet, he’d probably assumed it had been civil. Her distress came as a surprise to him, and his presence a surprise to her-he’d waited for her instead of retiring as instructed. It was a subtle showcase of where his strongest loyalty lay. He reached for her, perhaps to take her in his arms, but she pushed him away and ran straight past him.

She locked herself in her room, ignoring Link and Sidon’s insistent knocking, and sobbed into Gisele’s shoulder until she was so dehydrated she struggled to weep any longer.


	4. arranged marriages? kinda gross

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> an update three days after the last one howboudat
> 
> I promise the champions will start making more of an appearance, for now im playing with zelink and figuring out where i want them to stand with each other before i throw fuckin revali in there
> 
> ty ty for all the love and support it keeps me going and i am thorsty for it i read and reread comments for literal days

Zelda couldn’t believe she’d done what she just did. 

She and Link had taken lots of pictures on their trip out, both of their surroundings and of each other, her favorite being a selfie next to a crepe stand, where she’d tugged him by the ear into the shot, and she’d tapped for shutter right as he’d turned to look at her, brows raised and eyes incredulous, mouth open around the start of a surprised noise, strands of hay colored hair loosening from his bun and falling around his face as she grinned wide and wicked right back, hand mid retreat on his cheek. The ear she hadn’t tugged on was bent downwards at a sheepish, highly endearing angle. He looked so offended and a little betrayed, and it cracked her up. She chose a few more scenic pictures from every district in Paris, added the caption ‘Seeing the beau et belle with new guard’ and posted it to Instagram. Then she screamed into her pillow and shut her phone and laptop all the way down, quite possibly forever.

It was like revenge porn, but not porn, instead something that would cause a media related nuclear meltdown for her father, and the revenge not porn was for her father and not for an ex.

Terrible analogy. Literally awful.

As much as she detested her father and damn near everything he did, she only ever toed the line, or walked dangerously narrowly upon it. Goddess, she had just fucking jumped over the line. Posting on Instagram without her father’s approval, with pictures of her and her similarly aged new guard dicking around in the streets of Paris, acting flirty and buddy buddy, literal fucking hours after her engagement to another man was announced. But she couldn’t help it. A voice inside her screamed that she must. Zelda liked to think it was Hylia guiding her and not her trying to justify her teenager tantrum with going absolutely batshit off the wall and hearing voices.

Her phone buzzed with the special vibration she’d chosen for Urbosa. The Gerudo was on emergency bypass, so Zelda’s phone immediately turned back on when a text from her came through.

Urbosa: Just got your post notification. It’s a strange path you’re choosing, but I support all you do that does not pose a mortal threat to yourself or others and you know that. Risky and I like it. I’m in your corner. Also, he’s cute. Good luck, my little bird.

Another from Link.

Darling: haha glad u didnt tag me

It was blunt, but the ‘haha’ made her feel like he wasn’t mad. Link wasn’t mad at the way she’d decided to lash out. That brought her a little comfort.

Hylia help them, she was somewhere beyond fucked and Link was happily following her bitch ass despite the way she’d been treating him, a dutiful two steps behind.

She simply hearted his message and turned her phone back off. She’d ignored him all night after he’d tried to comfort her, even after the connection she’d felt to him when they’d explored Paris together. She’d forgotten, for a brief moment, that she was supposed to be fighting him at every turn.

She didn’t much feel like doing that anymore. But what other choice did she have? Everything else was spiraling out of control, being snippy with Link was the only real choice she could independently make. He was a living breathing symbol of the way her father had trapped her, and she had to fight him. She had to.

He was waiting outside her door when she finally rose. She resolutely ignored him, wouldn’t even look at him. He followed her, two steps behind instead of right at her side like yesterday, and the silence choked them both. Her behavior towards him was quickly becoming contradictory, and he took notice. She could hear his ears swiveling back and forth in agitation. His ears were long enough for the tips to make a tiny whooshing noise as they flicked back and forth, and while she had found it endearing from the moment she met him, this morning it pounded against her eardrums and infuriated her, for whatever reason.

Sidon embraced her as soon as she entered the dining hall, face stricken. So he had heard news of the engagement. Mipha wrapped herself around Zelda’s back, humming a soft and soothing tune. It was all she could do to not weep between the Zora siblings.

Sidon took her face between his clawed hands and softly kissed her forehead, offering a smile, but the usual light in his eyes was dimmed with sorrow for his friend. “Happy birthday, Zelda.” Mipha murmured the same, continuing her gentle cooing.

Link was silent, several paces behind them.

The younger Zora brushed hair out of her eyes. “You gave Link and I quite the scare, my friend. We were sure someone had died and you were too grief stricken to cope, until we all got the news. I understand now you are grief stricken for other reasons. I was preparing for the day I would try my hardest to protect you from this, but I never thought he would sell you off minutes before your 18th birthday. It’s startled the entire hotel. The papers are in a huff about it as well.”

“Father hasn’t even told me the man’s name, or how old he is, or what he does. I apologized but I’ve disappointed him far too much.” Sidon bit his lip, and he suddenly looked nervous. Mipha let out a shaky sigh and Link stepped a foot closer.

“I was sure you knew. I fear it will only add to your pain, but… you should hear it from sympathetic friends and not your bastard father, I believe… his name is Aldrich Terron, he’s a Hylian British Noble who appeared just before you made your exit from the party because of the lockdown. We-I, at least-have reason to believe your father called the lockdown so you would have no chance of meeting or even seeing him. Zelda… he’s 54 years old.” He whispered the last part like it was a well kept secret but it crushed Zelda so completely it was as if he’d screamed it in her face. Mipha caught her just below her ribs before she could crumple to the ground, her soft tune growing louder and more sure as she tried desperately to console her fellow heiress with a strong grip and traditional Zora lullaby.

“Have strength. He’s a good man, at the very least. I’ve met him. He’s a lonely soul who just wants some company; he will not treat you poorly or with malice. Your father had the sense to assure you would be safe in Sir Aldrich’s companionship. You are headstrong and fierce-you can fight your way through this,” Mipha soothed, nuzzling the side of Zelda’s face.

“Mipha, it is more than that. Zelda is expected to have children with her husband-though she is the true heiress, he will be the head of the household. Even her children will be regarded with more respect than she. She may dodge abuse at his hand, perhaps, but her freedom, my sister, what’s to happen to it? Her research with Purah, who will maintain it when she is keeping a house? She is young, especially for a Hylian, and she is already being imprisoned. The Zora have time to come to terms with arranged marriages and get the most out of their young lives-for Zelda, the same cannot be said,” Sidon whispered back fiercely, and Mipha looked downtrodden.

“Mr. Hyrule is a cruel man whose empathy for his daughter died the same day his wife did. We held her as a baby, and we watched him change as she grew up, control her in any way he possibly could under the guise of being overprotective. This is his final stand, Mipha, don’t you see? To send her off with a man to finally beat her down into submission the way he could not. I can’t allow it, not like this.”

Zelda had had enough of the two talking about her future as though she wasn’t standing between them. She broke away from them, smoothing out her dress and wiping at her face. “There is no other option, my dear friends. This is how it must be. It was what I was born to do, I’ve been barred from being more. I thank you for protecting me, but I’ve given up on this particular fight. We must save our energy for fighting battles that are more worth our time. Something we can change. This… This is not worth your worrying.” She waved a simple goodbye, and walked quickly back down the hallway from whence she came, Link following behind. Sidon’s feeble calls for her return went ignored, as much as they broke her heart.

“I know we’ve only known each other for a short while, but it seems uncharacteristic for you to be giving up so easily,” Link remarked, and the sudden words from him startled her.

“Yes, well, sometimes even wildfires grow tired of raging.” She responded curtly, playing with the hem of her long skirt.

“Zelda,” He said softly, and she swung around to look at him. The pity in his eyes made her want to start swinging. “Please don’t fight me. I don’t want to become another stress in your life. Please let me help you, let me be a companion, a-a friend, even. I see your pain. We can help each other, if you’d just let me-”

“You waste precious words, my darling. You are a human shield I feel is unnecessary, and you will fail if you attempt to become more to me,” She interrupted sharply, but he merely gave her a flat look.

“Zel, you’re fond of me. I know you are. Drop the act, don’t be difficult. You keep telling me you’ll run from me, and then you don’t. You don’t want to be difficult anymore, I see that. So don’t be, you’re as stubborn as a mule, and for what?”

He was close enough for her to flick his ear, so she did just that. He barely flinched. “You’ve earned yourself no points equating me to a mule, Link. Pot calling the kettle black, regardless,” She tugged his ear where she had flicked it, a brief gesture, and then smirked. “I’ll consider it, but you have a group of guardsmen to command the respect of as their new leader. Go on and find them, that’s an order. I’ll see you at lunch.”

<>

They did not, in fact, see each other at lunch. They went a full two days without seeing each other in person at all. Her birthday celebration had been a quiet, private affair, but Link felt bad for not attending. His guard had been hard to gain the trust of, considering he was younger than all of them, new to staff, and couldn’t speak to them, but he’d roped them under control by assuring he expressed his liking of Zelda where he could. That appeared to be the straw that broke the camel’s back for the men and women who had been working for Zelda since she was a little girl, and the entire group warmed up to him. 

They remained wary of him, as he hadn’t quite earned Mr. Hyrule’s full trust, but they spent hours sparring and training and getting to know one another, and he’d played more than a few rounds of cards when he was off-duty. He quite liked the Hyrule family guard, and he couldn’t say he minded being the man in charge.

He led them on their rounds, answering to almost no one but himself. It felt fantastic, to just do his duty without interruption or mindless guidance. He felt a little weird inducing that feeling onto others, the same way he felt when he was in the military, but he was getting paid the big bucks this time, so he looked past it. They seemed to take his orders with a grain of salt anyway. That would do for now, but he’d have to demand more respect eventually. For now, though, he was content with being the head baby of the guard, whose orders were respected, but only half heartedly, his commands followed, but with smirks and eye rolls. He had a feeling they only tolerated him because Zelda was fond of him. He’d work with it. Once he was fully on good terms with everyone, he’d start the process of enforcing his leadership. What great fun that would surely be.

Zelda had not left the hotel or attended a large scale event since her birthday, so he wasn’t required to stay by her side, but he did try to visit. However, every time he knocked on her door, Gisele or Marionne would answer and wave him away with a terse ‘Mistress is busy at the moment’. And he understood. She was engaged and planning a wedding, so he shrugged it off.

They reunited at dinner on the fifth night of the Paris trip. Zelda smiled at him, but it was weary, and her glow was once again dimmed. He brought up a chair and squeezed between her and Sidon and dug in to the plate that was set before him-roasted carrots, potatoes and a clearly expensive cut of meat that Mipha informed him was venison. When he glanced over at his charge, he started at the sizable diamond ring that now adorned her ring finger. Had that man sent her an engagement ring instead of proposing in person? The deal was already sealed, he supposed, and maybe that was just the way the ultra rich did things, but he felt insulted for her, not that she probably wasn’t disturbed herself. Or maybe she expected this. Maybe she had been told all her life this was how it would go.

She turned to regard him and caught him staring at her ring. Her hand retreated under the table to fold into her lap as she continued picking at her food with the other. ”I missed you, you know. Your company, your presence. In an ironic way.”

“What the fuck does that even mean?” He muttered out the corner of his mouth, concealed under the din of chatter echoing across the room. 

For her ears only.

She laughed, loud, high and spritely, and several heads in the room swiveled in their direction, smiled, then turned back to their meals.

“I requested your presence several times, but Gisele always came back telling me you were busy,” She remarked absently, gnawing (somehow elegantly?) on a carrot and ignoring his question.

“I swung by your room a few times a day and your maids always told me you couldn’t take the time to see me,” He responded. She put her fork down, and her dark blonde eyebrows furrowed. She seemed to shake whatever thought she had off, the emerald attached to her circlet sliding across her forehead as she shook her head. Link gave her a puzzled look that she brushed off as well.

“Hm. Well, I’m sorry I was so busy. Finish eating your fill, Link, before one of the cooks flogs us for being the only people left in the dining hall. I want to go for a walk and you’re required to accompany me.” He looked down at his near empty plate, shrugged, and rose, offering his hand to his princess. She looked at him, at his hand, back at him, rolled her eyes practically into the back of her head and accepted his offer, letting him help her out of her seat.

As soon as she was on her feet, however, she grinned at him, eyes sparkling, and loudly pronounced “Race you!” to practically the entire hall, and then darted for the oak doors that led into the hallway, multiple long skirts billowing dramatically even when she balled them up in her fists. She was barefoot, and knowing her, she had probably been without shoes the whole day. A subtle act of rebellion.

With the echoes of bemused laughter from the rest of the diners as his guide, he darted after Zelda as she skidded around the corner, following after his princess. Always, he had found himself doing recently, after his princess. 

He felt his hair loosen from its already loose ponytail as he caught up to her, and she shrieked playfully when he made a grab for the hem of one of her skirts. They thundered down the hallway, undoubtedly disturbing the guests not affiliated with the Hyrule family, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care. He felt juvenile, in that warm, fuzzy way that made him wish this moment of youth would keep on forever. They only slowed as they neared the entrance to the gardens, and she skidded to a stop so suddenly he slammed into her back. She let out a loud ‘ow’ and reached back blindly to smack at him, scolding him for being such a ‘silly sergeant’. Then she grappled to his arm and led him stoutly outdoors.

“The gardens in Paris are beautiful; the groundskeepers here tend to flora that grows nowhere else in this hemisphere. I’m no gardener and botany is not my field of choice, but I envy them,” She remarked, reaching down with the hand that wasn’t strapped to Link’s arm to brush her fingertips against the petals of a row of dark pink blossoms. “This, for instance, is the Lamprocapnos spectabilis, or the Asian Bleeding Heart. It can be quite easy to obtain in this environment, but I’ve no idea how they grow it so spectacularly in such a big, light polluted city. They can be quite sensitive blooms.” 

“You seem to know a lot about this random flower we stumbled across for someone who claims to not be a botanist,” Link teased.

Zelda smiled softly. “My mum adored the flora of this world. She used to memorize plant names and fun facts just to have something to do and think about when she was at my father’s side. I’d join her when I was bored. I carry everything she taught me about plant life right here,” She tapped lightly at her chest, right over her heart. 

“She sounds lovely,” He murmured, and she laughed.

“Oh, she was just magical. Enchanting. She lit up a room. For every moment my father was a bastard, she was just… the fairy of all fairies, a spitfire, bold and defiant of what was expected of her, up to and including the day she died. I was nine years old, and to this day I still haven’t completely figured out what to do without her. My father hasn’t either, that much is clear.”

Zelda was just like her mother, Link decided. Magical. Enchanting. A fairy, a spitfire, bold and defiant, all these things and more until her dying breath. “If you ask me, Zel, she lives in you.”

Zelda plonked her head down on his shoulder for a brief moment. His heart squeezed. “I’d like to think so.”

<>

Their walk lasted a good hour, and Zelda was pleased to find Link was much more chatty when they were alone. As her wedding approached, however, she feared they would not have many moments like the ones they had shared as a pair so far. Her father may view her friendliness with him as a threat to her groom or a sign of infidelity. Even worse, Sir Aldrich could believe the same. Link could be taken from her side completely if he was viewed as a threat to the sanctity of her marriage. She was a virgin pure, had never even kissed a boy, but of course if she forged a friendship with even one (1) adult man she’d be tainted. She’d quickly become an unwanted bride. Zelda Hyrule? An unwanted bride? Only if she’d ever held hands out of wedlock. 

Still though, as their walk in the gardens came to an end after she’d made him kneel in the mud with her to admire the Silent Princess, she came to her decision, turning to her guard. “I can no longer doubt that we are something close to friends, my dear. I’m ready to form an alliance of sorts with you, if you are,” She raised her pinky finger in front of his face, wiggling it teasingly. “I’ll give my approval of your permanent position and personally appoint you, meaning that you’ll belong exclusively to my staff, like Gisele and Marionne, as opposed to my father’s. You’ll be my shoulder to cry on, and I yours. We’ll support each other through thick and thin.”

“I’m also like, you know, your sworn protector,” He grumbled, linking his pinky with hers.

“Yes, yes, that too, if it helps you sleep at night.”

“I’m contractually obligated to die for you but okay.”

They pinky-shook on it.

Link led Zelda inside, the heiress still chattering happily, and in the bushes on the other side of the garden, Gisele and Marionne glowered.

<>

Link had been ignoring the news the past few days, but thanks to Beedle, he knew he and Zelda were all over it. He was immediately accused by the tabloids of being disgustingly casually close with her, and she of being unfaithful to her fiancé (who she still hadn’t met) only hours before the news of the engagement broke, and then after, flaunting pictures of him and their adventures on Instagram. Paparazzi pictures of them, arms linked as they walked along the Seine, shining against the setting sun, were also spreading. He was stoic faced in sunglasses, staring at her, carrying a bigass mom bag of food, and she grinned wickedly back up at him. They literally just looked like two friends vacationing, but the press had zeroed in on the linking of the arms. 

Traditionally, he was supposed to walk two to three paces behind her, a respectable but still defensible distance. Zelda had insisted, however, on that day and pretty much every day since, that he walk alongside her. Her way of harmlessly puppeting him for her defiant intentions.  
Luckily, Zelda was a generally beloved girl, a young scientist and philanthropist praised for her beauty and generosity, a benefactress and annual donor to many charities-she got cut a respectable amount of slack by most media outlets, and even, it seemed, by Mr. Hyrule, who had maintained an anxiety inducing silence on the whole ordeal, even as reporters begged him for comment. Link, however, was getting wrecked by pretty much everyone, labelled a disrespectful, unknown, incoming homewrecker who was gonna ruin Zelda’s life. Hey, he wanted to protest, Zelda’s gonna ruin her own life on her terms!

He’d grown so protective of her so quickly it was almost nonsensical. Even the guards who had been loyal to the family for years commented on it, but he and Zelda just had a connection he responded very strongly to. Link and Zelda, Zelda and Link. He felt, somehow, that that was just right. Another law of the universe. Space is infinite, science is a boundless field, humanity will never have everything figured out, Link and Zelda, Zelda and Link.

Link had no idea if she felt the same pull, and holy hell the prospect of the connection he felt being unrequited fucking scared him. But he knew. It was practically fact, wasn’t it? He was supposed to be running after his princess. Always his princess. And she would always be running, somehow, from her knight.


	5. only your laughter makes me laugh

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> so sorry this chapter took so long to get out, school got so crazy and i briefly lost interest, but im re-inspired after beating ganon again, not exactly less busy but whatever. hope you enjoy.  
i dont know if my uploading schedule will ever be set or improved upon we will all just have to suffer  
this weeks zelink songs are closer and also the fifth season both by oh my girl fucking bump them gays  
chapter taken from lyrics to the fifth season  
xoxo mag

Three weeks ago, Link had accepted a one year commission for $300,000 as the position of head of guard from Rhoam Hyrule and had been knighted as a member of Zelda’s personal staff. Three weeks ago, the Hyrule entourage had returned to New York City in shifts depending on rank within the family-the Hyrules and the family’s personal circle first, the low-level hires last. The entire process was an exhausting 25 hour affair, interrupted briefly by Zelda and Mr. Hyrule’s argument over whether or not the maids and butlers were deserving of a first class flight (Zelda won, and the lower level employees touched down in a luxury 747 only an hour off schedule). 

Life got simpler for Link and harder for Zelda in quick succession. Link found it far easier to rally the staff around him as a member of Zelda’s actual entourage, and Zelda showered him with attention and affection over their newfound alliance/friendship, piquing the interest and earning the loyalty of even stubborn night shifts. In the shadow of Link’s success, however, the circles around Zelda’s eyes darkened and her mouth became more thin-lipped and creased in an ever-present frown. She had taken to playing with her engagement ring as a nervous tic, and at this point he was afraid she was going to twist the diamonds right out of their little diamond-socket thingies.

Link didn’t know much about jewelry.

The wedding was in six months-Zelda still hadn’t met her groom, and she was constantly swamped with planning. He tried to help, but she usually just got frustrated with him when he couldn’t tell the difference between two microscopically different shades of royal blue and shooed him off to go hang out in a corner and play with a butterfly knife again. With how pampered she usually was, Link expected her to get a little help with her wedding; but she was hardly getting any at all besides his feeble suggestions and the maid’s attempts to console her. He tried to get her to relax sometimes, but she’d settled herself into a ‘let’s get this over with’ position, and was a born again workaholic.

When she wasn’t being her own wedding planner, she was out and about the estate doing science shit. She always got uppity when Link didn’t accompany her, so he’d grown used to getting 20,000 steps in trailing her around the gardens and fields and laboratory in Hateno, dutifully holding out tins for her to put samples in, or procure a spare pen out of his ass when she lost hers digging in the mud. 

Like today. They were in the (man made?) swamps at the edge of the Northern Hyrule Estate and Link, although a lover of all things nature, would rather have been anywhere else. But Zelda was right at home, face streaked with dirty stripes of joking war paint and up to her elbows in thick brown sludge the likes of which Link had never experienced, hair piled on top of her head and mouth shining in a sunny smile as she contentedly dug around in search of Hylia knew what. 

She turned to him, grin suddenly mischievous, and he barely caught her filthy hand by the wrist as it shot up towards his face, aiming to leave a sticky brown handprint on his left cheek. She’d already succeeded on his right, and the mud was drying in the hot sun and cracking unpleasantly against his pores. He grunted with disdain as he shoved her arm back towards her, and she giggled. “Mud’s good for the skin, darling-you need a facial anyways.” 

Mr. Hyrule always hated it when they returned to the mansion filthy, and he was scolded for letting Zelda get into such a mess during her research, but it was worth her smiles and laughter. She didn’t do that these days unless she was out in the field with him or working in the lab with Purah and Robbie.

He took a glob of mud from the pile surrounding him and plopped it on top of her head. She shrieked something unholy at him, and he watched with amusement as birds in the surrounding trees squawked in alarm and took flight. He laughed as she shoved him backwards. He hit the swamp with a disgusting plap that sent the heiress into a fit of laughter, collapsing face-first into the sludge. Her outfit wouldn’t be salvageable after today’s quest, and now neither would his. He was glad they’d left their phones in the lab. She came back up, closing her eyes and squidging her nose as she wiped mud off her face. He simply laid back against the goop, letting it slowly consume him as she went back to work, shoulders still shaking with laughter. It was like a cold, semisolid blanket, strangely comforting in its filthy abyss-like texture, and it definitely felt nice against his sunburnt shoulders and back.

He hadn’t had a summer this childish since before he was in high school. 

<>

The press often likened Zelda Hyrule’s smile to the warmth and brightness of the sun; big, beautiful and welcoming, you’d just want to wrap yourself in it. 

Zelda would be the first to admit the past month had been overcast. 

When she and the Sergeant had returned to the castle after a day of supposedly dignified research with their faces yet again tanned, their shoulders burned, their bodies crusted with mud and their clothes in dirty tatters, her father had sent Link away with his tail between his legs for three entire days, and a senior guard subbed in for him. It was dull. He was dull. 

Link may be the silent type, but the spark in his eyes and the spring in his step screamed of an unexplored adventure at every turn, long as you followed him. An unannounced game of hide and seek in the woods on the way to Purah’s lab, spraying her in the face with a hose behind the barn as they tried in vain to rid themselves of evidence of the day’s activities, hiding her mascara wands in one of his pockets, all done with this devilish smirk that silently promised more fun. He created bright spots in an otherwise dreary world.

Unfortunately, his devotion to mischief and keeping her sane weren’t quite enough to save her from drowning. Planning a wedding, especially one expected to be so extravagant, alone as she was, was proving to be a monumental task. She and Sir Aldrich had interacted briefly over the phone, when he called her to shyly ask what color flowers would be in her bouquet and woven into her hair, so he could tuck flowers of the same color into his lapel. Mipha was right, the man seemed soft spoken and pleasant, almost apologetic as he scribbled down her arrangements-acacia blossoms, Silent Princesses, and candytuft. She almost felt bad for the last one-her mother taught her touches of floriography, and candytuft communicated unrequited love. 

In the meantime, she and Link made quite the imposing pair walking around the estate, at least when her father wasn’t punishing him for going along with her antics like it was his idea all along. Zelda was already tall as it was, 5’8 flat, and Link was still taller than her (although he mentioned that if they had met when he was 18 and she was 15, she would have had him by probably half a foot-a late bloomer, that one). The little village boys who always inquired if she’d play Minecraft with them were almost terrified of Link, despite her constant reassurances and his ability to soften into the most malleable, harmless being alive around children. She often shook herself out of fantasies when the maids would hand their babies off to him when he offered so they could have free hands to do laundry for an hour or so, a stone-faced, rugged, large (if not sort of stick-like in figure) man, and all the babies would do was coo and settle into his arms and against his hoodie for a nap. She took lots of pictures.

Impa had slyly commented that they looked like the next royal couple, walking around side by side. Zelda had almost scolded her elderly nanny before remembering her place and manners, simply scowling half-heartedly at her as she and Paya laughed.

“I’m just saying, if you really loved me you would share him,” Sidon said over the phone. She near hung up.

Would these people so close to her heart stop teasing her just because Link was young and attractive and not a sack of bones like her previous heads of security? She was trying to plan her wedding to a sack of bones, Hylia help her, and no one was any help at all in that department. For a man so eager for her to be wed, her father was not eager to offer his help, only his black diamond credit card, which at the end of the day, she supposed, was all the help she really wanted let alone needed from him.

Next on her list, however, was wedding dress shopping, which made 8-year-old Zelda trill with excitement. She had no budget and access to the biggest treasure trove of designer dresses on the East Coast, and she was going to make it count. She just wished she had more people to take with her to her fitting-at the moment, it was Impa, Paya, Link, Gisele and Marionne, and Urbosa (Sidon and Mipha were trying to fly in, but weren’t sure if they’d be able to make it-Zelda understood, this really wasn’t that important in the grand scheme of things, but damn if she didn’t want her de facto brother and sister with her). 

Link brushed a lock of hair that had escaped from his bun behind the knifetop of his ear as he showed a veil he had taken a shining to to Impa and Paya, who nodded approvingly, if only to appease him and get him to put it back down. The Hyules may have deep pockets, but Link accidentally ruining something and having to pay for it wouldn’t be a good look for the Hyrule nor the Greene name. She was spying on her family from behind a curtain as an employee cinched up the corset on the dress she was trying on. Gisele and Marionne were seated on the couch next to Urbosa, both of their eyes locked onto her guard, faces blank. 

They’d been acting so strangely around him, even when he was being attentive, funny, mischievous, sweet. She’d kept an eye on them to see if maybe he was doing something adverse around her maids, but no. He’d (pity?) snicker at something devastatingly unfunny that she’d said, Gisele would glare. She’d coo as he bounced the toddler a laundrywoman had handed off to them in his arms, Marionne would act like him babysitting for her coworkers was offensive. It was beyond peculiar, but she supposed that sometimes people just didn’t like other people, no particular reason for it. 

Perhaps her lady’s maids and Link just didn’t quite mesh. That was probably it. A shame, really. They were all so sweet.

As the woman finished cinching up Zelda’s gown (the first of the day), Link picked up a sizable diamond choker and made a show of stringing it around his neck and turning to Urbosa for approval. The Gerudo laughed softly, then caught Zelda’s eye through the curtain.

“Are you ready, my little bird? Come here, let us see,” She beckoned. Zelda stepped out, holding the still loose, sleeveless, sweetheart neckline bosom against her chest, suddenly shy as all eyes landed on her. Urbosa crooned and Impa made a hooting sound of approval.

“G-Give us a twirl!” Paya encouraged. Zelda complied, and the gorgeous skirt of the dress fanned out beautifully, the lace at the bottom glittering with tiny, sewn in diamonds. She laughed like a child, amazed at the sight. 

Impa smiled broadly at her, a radiant thing against her wrinkled face, then snapped her fingers. “Sergeant! Get that veil you were looking at.” Link nodded, turning away to go and grab it off the display. Zelda noticed his ears were bright pink. Whether it had to do with her and her wedding dress, she had no idea.

(She sort of hoped so.)

He returned with it laid like a lethargic white snake across his arms, presenting it to her with a curt little joking bow and then stepping back. It was the longest veil she’d ever seen in person. The attendant stepped up on the podium in front of the mirror with her, helping her fix the veil into her crown braid (she still wasn’t sure if she’d be doing anything special at all with her hair for the wedding, although Link volunteered to help weave the flowers from her arrangement into her hair. She said she’d think about it) and draping it over her shoulders. Urbosa approached her, taking Zelda’s hands into her own. Her eyes were misty, a rare sight on the stone-faced senator. The Gerudo brushed her thumb along Zelda’s cheek as she spoke. “My little bird, you make the most stunning bride. How I wish your mother was here to see you.”

Zelda stood on her tiptoes to press her forehead to Urbosa’s. “I wish she was too. But you are enough. You guys are perfect and all I need.”

“Oh Mistress, you are so beautiful,” Gisele and Marionne said in near unison, like they’d rehearsed it. She smiled at them, nodded.

Link approached, reached out with one hand to brush at a lock of her hair, or adjust her veil, or touch her face, then stopped. He hesitated, something curious shining in his mirror-to-the-soul eyes, then he leaned in and whispered, “You’re radiant. You shine like the sun.” She felt her face erupt in reds and pinks and he nodded stiffly, stoic and seemingly satisfied with his work, and promptly walked out of the room. 

There was a pregnant pause as all of the women stared at each other. Then Impa cackled. “Run away with him and elope, kid, you’d make beautiful babies and have your happily ever after. I just know it.” 

<>

Impa was still on the eloping thing back at the estate, when Urbosa had bid them goodbye, kissing Zelda’s hands, Sidon and Mipha had facetimed to see the dress, Link had clocked out for the night to go play cards and drink with the other wildmen on her staff, and Paya was asleep by the fire in Zelda’s private library. Zelda scrolled through Twitter with her head on Impa’s shoulder as the elderly woman meditated. 

“I’m more than serious, Zelda. You’re never as happy as you are at his side. I think it would be worth…pursuing. I think you’ll regret it if you don’t.” 

Zelda scoffed. “Impa, we’re hardly friends. Companions maybe. Barely. Besides, I don’t like him like that.”

The older woman cracked an eye open to stare down at her. Ah, to be as wise as the mountains and tall as the trees. “Bullshit, little one. This dusty old nose can still smell it. You’ve bonded with him and I can tell you want to explore that bond.”

Zelda sat up, glaring at her old nanny, her heart suddenly hard. “You are out of line suggesting such things of myself and my employee, Lady Impa. You’d do well not to disrespect me and my future groom so,” She snapped. Impa stared at her, calm as ever. Her eyebrows raised. Zelda’s anger was fleeting like fireworks, fading too soon under such an unchanging, unjudging gaze, the one she’d known by sight since her mind could store memories.

“I was raised by witches, girl. I know more about what you feel now than even you do,” Was all she said, and Zelda’s temper sparked again. She stood suddenly, and Paya stirred from sleep, sitting up and rubbing her eyes. Impa set down her mug of tea, so calm her movements were almost lethargic.

“For all our time together, you know nothing about me and you certainly know nothing about Link. Don’t speak to me in such a condescending manner when you are suggesting infidelity, with my employee of all people!”

Paya glanced at Impa, confused. “Grandmother, why would you say such a thing-”

Impa raised one palm, silencing her, and Zelda seethed. She took one of Zelda’s balled fists in both of hers. “My job, Zelda, has always been to protect you. I see a way to protect you in that man, and I must steer you in a direction in which you take that chance. I have to. When he looks at you, I see not love in his eyes, but the potential for it. I believe chasing that will lead you to your happily ever after. But I apologize for voicing my thoughts so recklessly and treating it as though it were a joke. It’s not a joke. It is your life, and I want that life to be the best it can possibly be. Not fighting your father the way you always have, giving in, that is not the way. I know why you picked the first dress you tried on when knowing you it should've taken hours. You're not excited about your wedding, not even about your dress. That is not what I want for you."

Zelda ripped her hand away. “Link is not going to be my scapegoat. What you are suggesting is highly inappropriate and I will not stand for it. My happily ever after will not be shaped by infidelity. Good night Lady Impa. Paya.” She nodded curtly at the girl, still curled by the fire, still as a stone and seemingly in shock, before turning on her heel and stalking up to her bedroom, only allowing herself to cry when the oak doors to the library slammed shut. Impa was right. She knew who she wanted to chase. But she wasn’t strong enough. She never would be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> boy in luv by bts plays as link lays dead on the ground


	6. so i cry and i pray and i beg

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> mr hyrule: i hate this picture bc we’re all looking at zelda but shes only looking at link
> 
> sir aldrich: she only got two eyes

Sir Aldrich was finally paying his future wife a visit today. Link was glad for it; maybe meeting him would alleviate some of Zelda’s worst fears. Or maybe it would exacerbate them. 

His princess was dressed to the nines today, down to the pristine white gloves on her delicate little hands and the delicate diamond circlet hanging down her forehead. She stared silently at the skirt of her floor length dress, desperately avoiding eye contact with her father as she played with her engagement ring.

As a maid announced Sir Aldrich’s arrival, Zelda’s twisting of her ring quickened into a rapid, violent act. Link, who stood behind her on her left side, meant to be a silent but imposing presence and showcase of the Hyrule family’s power, rested a hand on her shoulder, still staring straight ahead at the door. She glanced back at him, and he smiled. She just stared, wide eyes terrified, the rest of her face completely blank. The doors swung open, and there was Sir Aldrich in all his glory.

He was aged in an elegant, George Clooney sort of way, the wrinkles of a life long lived only complimenting his handsome face, salt and pepper hair, and admittedly kind eyes. Link’s grip on Zelda’s shoulder tightened and then released as she and her father rose to greet him. Zelda visibly stiffened as the 54 year old took ahold of her hands and kissed one of her gloves. She smiled, rigid and polite, the same way she’d smiled at Link the night they’d met-barely a smile at all, and out of necessity more than anything else.

“Sir Aldrich, this is my daughter Zelda Hyrule, your bride, and her head of security, Sergeant Link Greene,” Mr. Hyrule said by way of introduction. 

“A pleasure,” Sir Aldrich exclaimed, clasping his hand into a shake. Link was quietly pleased to note he was half a head taller than the duke. The older man glanced at him minutely when he failed to exchange pleasantries. 

“Link is selectively mute. Words from him to those outside of his personal circle are a rare sort of song around here,” Zelda said almost flatly, grabbing his wrist and dragging him away from the duke and back to her side. 

Sir Aldrich hummed his dissent. “Do you consider yourself part of that personal circle, Zelda dear?”

Mr. Hyrule chuckled, a conversational but slightly dangerous sound. A warning. He didn’t like the angle Zelda had taken behaviorally. It made Link bristle. “Most words from his mouth are spoken to her. They are quite… loyal to each other, to say the least.” 

“What a lovely thing to hear. It can be difficult to find real loyalty-unattached to money or power-within the staff closest to you and your own. You should feel blessed to have a man like the Sergeant in your daughter’s corner,” Sir Aldrich smiled, and it seemed… genuine? 

Mr. Hyrule stroked his beard, nodding along. “I agree. I’m fortunate to have someone so close to my child in the ways that I am not.” 

Zelda and Link glanced at each other. Cryptic.

“Well, we’ll give you two some time to chat. Come, Sergeant.”

“No,” The heiress snapped, slipping her fingers between Link’s as he moved to obey. He stopped in his tracks as she held his hand in a vice like grip. She looked terrified and small but determined as all three men turned to stare at her. 

Aldrich blinked. Mr. Hyrule raised a dangerous brow. She swallowed, steadying herself. “I’d feel much more secure if one of my guards stayed here with me-that is, if it is no offense to you, Sir Aldrich?” Zelda? Wanting Link to be around her doing his job? What a strange and new development.

The duke nodded and opened his mouth to agree with the request when Mr. Hyrule grabbed Link by the shoulder, ripping him out of Zelda’s grip, and steered him out of the room, the door slamming shut behind them before Zelda’s indignant little noise had even left her mouth. 

His boss turned to him, stormily calm. “We have much to discuss, Sergeant.”

<>

Zelda and Sir Aldrich stared at each other in shocked silence, her hand hanging limply in the air where Link’s used to be. She retracted it back to her side as the man cleared his throat and sat back down on the loveseat behind him. She followed silently, squishing herself against the arm of the couch on the other side.

“So…” Aldrich began, tapping his fingers against his leg. His salt and pepper mustache twitched. “You and the Sergeant, you get along quite well?”

“Yes,” Zelda answered quietly, picking at a cuticle. “We’re… teammates, companions of sorts.” Aldrich leaned over to meet her eye.

“But not friends?” 

She swallowed. “It’s… complicated. I adore Link and I’m sure he quite likes me-he’d have to to stay by my side for this long, when I’m so stubborn and brash. I’m quite independent and our age gap, however small, can be hard to bridge. He’s been to war, led people, and is far more mature than I can say for myself. He’s the silent type too, I’m sure you noticed.” She flashed the older man a quick, polite smile to go along with her half-joke. Table manners. 

He smiled back, but his eyes were sad.

“Zelda, I know we will never have the sort of relationship you probably dreamed of as a little girl. All I want at the end of the day is a friend. I can sense you’re afraid I’ll forbid a friendship between you and the Sergeant. That’s cruel, my dear, and I won’t stand for allowing such a thing, especially when I was separated from so many at your age in preparation for becoming nobility. Isolation is no way to live, especially when so much weight is on your shoulders. Forcing someone to bear it alone would be… abhorrent. There will be many things I will have to… make you do, for lack of a better term. Abandoning those close to you will not one of them.”

Zelda shot him a quick glare. “If you’re so concerned about me becoming isolated, why are you marrying me in the first place? Why did you ask for my hand if my freedom is so important to you?” 

He smiled that same sad, understanding smile. “I know it may come off sounding ridiculous and even predatory, but I saw an opportunity to protect a young person from many of the threats of high profile married life. I am one of the only  
men on your father’s radar of sutors who will treat you with dignity and not as property, that much I can tell you.”

She swallowed, chin up and shoulders back. Calm, cool, and stormy. No warmth towards this man, even in the face of such unexpected kindness. “My first demand of our marriage, of which there will be many, is that wherever we go, whatever we do, my Lady’s Maids come with me, my helpers and cooks come with me, my guard comes with me, Link comes with me. I don’t want new staff, my people have contracts with me and it will stay that way. No matter what.” 

Aldrich laughed, short but bright and amused. “Ah, you flip a switch just as fast as I was told you do, dear,” He poured himself a glass of wine from the bottle sat on the coffee table. “It’s as good as done. Near anything you want in this world, I can get for you. But we need to work together. That’s all a marriage is, after all, a lifelong team of two. So let’s talk about what we want from each other.”

<>

Link was waiting outside the door when she exited, leaving Aldrich (he insisted she dropped the title) to his own devices before her father rejoined him. “He’s… lovely,” She stated, and the confused look on her face made Link snort, although he wiped off his amused expression. She raised an eyebrow at him, but shook it off. He was probably just trying to be professional in the presence of her groom. She continued down the hallway, and when she turned her head to make another comment, she startled at the… lack of Link. Swiveling around, she found him, three paces away, stoic as always, but resolutely not making eye contact. Her hands flopped down to her sides. “Alright, what did father say to you?”

“He said I’m not acting like a professional and that if we ‘kept up’ my contract would be terminated.”

Zelda sighed, suddenly drained when faced with her father’s meddling. “Link, he can’t do that. You’re mine-under my name, more like. You’re my employee, not his.” 

He turned sharp eyes to her, irritated. She took a half step back. He’d never really been angry with her, only exasperated or a little annoyed, which was sort of surprising, considering she’d treated him like a doormat for the first week and a half they knew each other. She should’ve seen this coming. “You’re always downplaying your dad’s authority, Zel. Just because I’m on your staff doesn’t mean I’m not still an employee under Hyrule Tech. I answer to Rhoam Hyrule before I answer to Zelda Hyrule, no matter who’s team I’m actually on. We all do. You have to get that through your head.” 

She scoffed, cheeks reddening at being called out by the elder, no matter how quietly he spoke and how croaky his voice was. “You’ve got nerve speaking to me like that.” 

He glared at her, ears pinned against his hair and flicking with agitation. Her own ears drooped slightly. “As someone who’s PTSD caused him to stop speaking to most people, I figured you’d value my words more regardless of context.”

“I do value your words, you idiot!” She raised her voice as her face continued to flush. A group of maids at the end of the hallway turned to look at them, and she shook her head. They turned back around and pretended to be invisible. “I value everything about you. You’re being a fucking fool, he wouldn’t separate us. You’re the only person who has ever gotten through, he wouldn’t risk losing control of me by taking you. It’s an empty threat.”

“Clearly I haven’t gotten through, considering you’re being a brat. Your dad’s right, we need to take a step back-” 

“Being my friend isn’t a crime to ponder over, fuckface,” She hissed. “Stop acting like it’s an-an inconvenience for us to be casual!”

“It’s not an inconvenience, but you’re so confident it’s an empty threat, I’m not willing to risk being separated over an assumption!” 

“I have lived under my father’s thumb for 18 years, Link. I know what he’s trying to do, please, you have to trust me,” She grabbed for his wrists, but he yanked them out of reach, leaving her stumbling. She grew suddenly panicked, the upset spiraling. “You can’t leave me.”

He growled. “That’s exactly what I’m trying to prevent, Miss Hyrule. Fuck this, this is going nowhere. I’m clocking out, I’ll see you in the morning.” She flinched at the sound of her own surname. No Zelda, no Zel, not even a joking, dry ‘Zelly’. 

“You’re literally actively leaving me, Link!” She shouted down the hallway at his retreating back. The angry tears she’d been holding in finally spilled down her cheeks, but when she sobbed he didn’t even turn around. She sobbed again, loud and petulant, like a toddler being ignored. The door at the end of the hallway slammed. She didn’t understand. He’d always been responsive to her tears, always tried to comfort her, even if she pushed him away. Maybe he was right. Maybe she was a brat. He was 4 years older, too mature to cater to her teenaged feelings or treat her with any sort of closeness, he was just realizing it now. Her darling was pushing her away because of her damned father and she could hardly stand it.

She turned and swished her way down to her bedroom, crying the whole way. She grabbed her phone off her nightstand, unlocking it with a swift movement and immediately going for iMessage.

Me: Darling

Me: Link

Me: I’m sorry

Me: Please come back to thembhouse I canmt leave this like this

Darling: ur being a child. i cant talk to u when ur being a child. like i said ill see u tomorrow

Me: Link please you’re killig me

Darling: zelda. ur fine. lets just take some time apart to calm down. stop and breathe

And she did. She threw her phone across the room and screamed and tugged at her own hair, but after that she stopped and breathed. Then she texted her friends.

Me: Link and I had a fight.

Sidon: vat

Sidon: that man? raised his tongue against you???????? woman are u crazy are u fucking insane. u imagined it period

Me: He said I was being a child and left for the night.

Me: He called me Miss Hyrule

Me: I texted him to apologize and he shut me down

Me: [screenshot.jpg]

Mipha: He’s right, he just needs some space, Zelda. And so do you.

Sidon: he made u cry didnt he

Me: yes

Sidon: k word time!:)

Mipha: No!

Sidon: !:)

Urbosa: No offense, my little bird, but you can be quite immature during arguments. He was right to step back and let you regain your composure before he spoke to you again. You can get… frustrating.

Sidon: tbh im surprised he hasnt beaten ur ass yet

Sidon: like yeah i would beat his ass in retaliation but he would be within his rights

Me: Thanks, Sidon.

Sidon: ily

Me: I’ll give him space and I’ll calm down but this is my father meddling again. He’s scaring Link into distancing himself and I don’t know what to do or how to convince him he’s being played

She turned her phone off. Goddess, everyone in her life was their own little walking nightmare. She would love them until her feet bled and her heart ached but Urbosa was ruthlessly correct in all of her observations, Sidon used inappropriate amounts of humor to cope, and Mipha was too gentle and understanding when she was in need of a beat down and a reality check. 

Impa waddled in at the exact second she buried her face in her hands and began to sob again. There was a split second of awkwardness as Impa slowly closed the door. They hadn’t spoken in a couple days, ever since their clash in the library. 

“Impa,” She blubbered, and the woman instantly melted, hurrying to her side and taking the heiress into her arms. 

“The maids told me everything, came and got me as soon as he left. It’s okay, my dear, it’s alright,” She ran a wrinkled hand through Zelda’s hair and wiped her tears. 

“He’s pulling away, Impa, just when I was finally calling him a friend,” 

“He’s trying to protect you both, dear, that’s all. Your father is unpredictable at best, and he’s right to think we shouldn’t assume his next move.”

“He won’t forgive me. I called him wretched names and acted like an ungrateful child,” She mumbled into the woman’s shirt.

“That man is soft-faced and kindhearted when it comes to you. He will. With open arms, he will. Give him the time he needs. Apologize in person. It will get sorted, I promise.”

“But what if it doesn’t?”

“It will,” The Sheikah woman said with certainty, voice hard and resolute. “Friendships like yours come once in a lifetime. Romantic soulmates? Only time will tell. Platonic soulmates? I don’t doubt it for a second. Keep that in your heart. Keep him in your heart-because my dear, you’re in his.”

Zelda pulled herself away from the woman to hold her at arm’s length. “I’m so sorry, Impa. I didn’t mean to lash out like that.”

Impa shook her head, eyes glassy. “I was out of line, my dear, and it’s well within your rights to set me straight. Even old geezers need guidance sometimes, no matter how angry the package it comes in. I’m sorry, dear, for being so reckless with my words.”

The women pressed their foreheads together and stayed there for a long while, until Marionne came to fetch them for dinner.

Mr. Hyrule inquired about Link’s absence at the table, but didn’t seem too concerned as it was explained that there had been an argument and he had clocked out early.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I cry, I pray and I beg  
Love me love me  
Say that you love me  
Fool me fool me  
Go on and fool me  
Love me love me  
Pretend that you love me  
Leave me leave me  
Just say that you need me
> 
> -Lovefool, the Cardigans


	7. girl talks boy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yall didnt react as positively to the last chapter as with others, and im guessing its because i made link and zelda fight and shit, but my anxietys telling me its because yall dont enjoy my writing anymore LMAOOOOO i hope thats not true. remember kids listening to ur severe anxiety is usually a bad idea. 
> 
> i got a letter back from my new prisoner pen pal today. heres how it went
> 
> my crackhead prisoner pen pal: what would you do if when you okay so he said yes would go?
> 
> me: um
> 
> go to writeaprisoner.com to keep someone company during their incarceration (yes u can see what theyre in for)
> 
> anyways
> 
> this time around we meet galli, links mentee of sorts, plussss revali and daruk!!

“Heard you and Miss Hyrule fought,” remarked Galli, plopping himself down in the chair opposite Link in the communal living room and sipping the froth off of the top of his beer. Link barely looked up from his phone to regard him, grunting in reply. Galli pouted, looking young as ever. “So it’s true then. You fucked up.”

Link dropped his phone into his lap and rubbed at his temples, sighing. Galli was a fresh faced Rito to the Hyrule family’s guard, but he and Link really clicked and he’d taken the 18 year old under his wing, despite the fact that he wasn’t the one with wings. He spared Galli a curt nod and picked his phone back up to open the notes app, preparing for conversation.

“I didn’t really need confirmation. Mira was there with Cassy and Iti and she told me all about it. Shouting at Miss Hyrule, are we now? Fortune does favor the bold.” Link scoffed and typed furiously before showing his phone to the Rito. 

‘i hardly SHOUTED at her. my vocal chords arent strong enough to raise my voice above a murmur anymore’

Galli sat back and regarded his leader quietly, claws stroking at his beak. “I’m stuck between the both of you. In the professional sense, she’s right that you shouldn’t be speaking to her like that and you were out of line. But in the same vein, you’ve been given orders by your boss’s boss to distance yourself. She’s insistent it’s an empty threat and that you’re treating your relationship with her as though it’s a crime, which is allegedly exactly what Mr. Hyrule wants. You don’t want to risk anything based on an assumption.” He squints and Link, who flips his phone back in his face.

‘shes so little, galli. i dont know. we shouldnt be anything but guard and charge anyways, but im scared shes attached to me, or something. she seems to be starting to like me like THAT. im a bit old for her.’

Galli laughs, high and taunting, before shaking his head, the beads weaved in his feathers jangling. “Please, Sarg. Her Fiancé’s more than double her age. Your four year gap blushes in the face of that crap. Besides,” Galli leans forward, staring at Link. “Above all, she’s lonely and afraid you’ll leave her. Don’t do it. I don’t know how to dodge Mr. Hyrule’s orders, but don’t hang her out to dry. She’s known her father for 18 years. Have some faith in what she’s learned from that.” 

<>

Link was up bright and early the next morning, when even the morning shift kitchen staff were still just yawning and stretching. He’d been up later than he cared to admit, angling his phone away from the others in the living room as he Googled shit like ‘how to apologize to a girl’. He would’ve made the search gender neutral, but Zel was a bit of a stereotypical girly-girl when it came to tokens of affection (jewelry, physical contact, gifts wrapped in pink), and he figured that extended to what constituted as an acceptable gesture to go along with a sincere apology and (completely platonic, yes sir lest his boss shoot him) confession of his fondness. Therefore, flowers. He was going to make her a bouquet. 

He wasn’t very good at delicate, elegant and graceful outside of combat, but he hoped she’d at least be endeared by his effort. Blush, do that cute little ‘oh!’ thing she often did when she was pleasantly shocked or surprised, smile wide enough that he caught a flash of the gap between her two front teeth that was just wide enough it was clear not even braces could fix it. Maybe, if he got this right, she’d let him hold her for a moment.

He’d gotten permission from the mix of Sheikah and Gerudo gardeners to pick a dozen flowers in the courtyard’s garden. Although the Hyrules had a sizable crop of Silent Princesses they’d managed to get to grow domestically and he’d been given the green light to pick them, he wouldn’t be. Zelda always raved about how her mother’s favorite flower was endangered, so he wouldn’t be cutting any at the stem for a bouquet for her, of all things. 

A dozen warm-colored roses would probably do the trick, in striking shades of reds, oranges, pinks, and yellows. Link shivered as he shut the door behind him. Winter was approaching quickly, and the temperate, lazy days he and Zelda had been enjoying thus far, collecting samples for her research and laying sprawled in the grass with one of the handmaid’s toddlers as she planned her wedding, were going to grow few and far in between and then cease altogether within the next couple of weeks. He pulled his jacket closer around him and made a beeline for the rose beds as a shock of frigid wind swept through the courtyard, the pinks and yellows of the sunrise just barely peeking over the horizon. 

It was quick work, there wasn’t any rooting around to find good looking roses, he just had to pick 4 colors and pluck 3 of each. Some spotty yellow and white daisies filled in the gaps, and he tied the entire thing together with a strip of royal blue fabric. He stood up and held the bouquet at arm’s length, admiring his handiwork. Not bad for a soldier. The perfect platonic apology gesture. He preened, the tips of his ears fluttering slightly. She’d like it, he was sure. 

As he made his way up to Zelda’s room after clocking in for the day, he pondered over getting her something a little more permanent to go along with the bouquet. The watch she had given him on his first day had been a heavy weight against his wrist ever since their fight, but it made him wonder if he got her a necklace or a bracelet, if she’d even wear it. If she’d like anything he’d pick out for her, or even be able to afford. His new six-figure salary paid handsomely, but a strikingly beautiful, rich and famous woman like Zel surely had a… refined taste for jewelry and clothes. Even her casual outfits dripped with dangling diamond earrings that looked like two tiny chandeliers. Such was the way of the ultra-rich.

He hated the wealthy with a passion. He really did, and he probably wouldn’t have chosen to serve them if he hadn’t been feeling so lost when the Hyrule family had reached out. But he liked the way Zelda handled being rich. She didn’t deprive herself of the luxury that comes with billions, no, but what her family didn’t pay in tax dollars she gave back in her own right. Hundreds of thousands, if not millions, a year to her most beloved charities, volunteer work, and of course, contributing to the sciences. She had made the papers 2 years back for fiercely and publicly demanding her father raise the wages of the family’s employees at every level-they would be able to live comfortably and be given full benefits or she’d instructed them all to quit. Zelda was quite the little anarchist, considering her position. He’d even heard her declare to the kitchen staff that they should ‘eat the rich’ for dinner more than a few times in a less than mocking manner. She handled being the daughter of a billionaire with as much grace and compassion as she could muster, and so many adored her for it. She had her flaws; she could be bratty, entitled, and a bit of a priss, she tended to be tone deaf when those of a lower class spoke of their struggles, and she was fierce and stubborn even with the closest of staff, but she had a heart steeped in gold all the same. She made sure people were taken care of.

Why had he ever even considered holding her at arm's length? Even then, her radiance would blind him. As the days wore on, Link’s adoration for his lovely princess only grew. Even when they were fighting, even when she was determined to be the bane of his existence.

As he approached Zelda’s bedroom, heart still humming with pleasant thoughts of her, he could hear the raucous laughter of someone who could only be Goron from inside her chambers. He knocked tentatively, and one of Zelda’s ladies in waiting (not Gisele or Marionne) opened the door just enough to spy who was visiting. Her eyes brightened with recognition immediately, and she swung the door open with a chirpy ‘Morning, Master Link!’. He nodded stiffly at her, guilting over the fact that he didn’t know her name. “Who is it, Iti?” Zelda called from around the corner. The bubbles in her voice told him she’d been giggling.

“Just Master Link, Mistress!”

The laughter and murmur of conversation in the other room abruptly stopped. Link’s ears picked up on someone sliding off the bed and making their way into the corridor. Zelda’s gentle features appeared from around the corner, and she stopped in her tracks at the sight of the bouquet in his hands. She was still in her pajamas. She approached him as if he was an easily startled deer, reaching out slowly for the arrangement. “For me?” 

He nodded, and she gingery took it from his hands, burying her nose in the flowers. She smiled shyly up at him, before putting them into the vase Iti seemed to pull out of her ass. “Thank you, Link.”

He opened his mouth to say-well, something. Anything, really. You’re welcome, I admire you greatly, you’re the apple of my eye, I’m sorry I’m so afraid to lose you, I’ve been talking to my friends about the way you take away my breath, it’s something bigger than myself, it’s something I don’t understand? But Zelda placed a manicured finger to his lips before flicking his nose, face scrunching up, eyes sparkling, and ears fluttering with amusement when he made a disgruntled noise at the smell of fresh nail polish. She patted his cheek. “We’ll talk later. As for now, we have company. Come here, come.” 

She took his hand (instead of his wrist as she usually would) and started tugging him towards her room. Of course he was utterly helpless but to obey. Sitting on the loveseat at the foot of Zelda’s bed were a Goron and a Rito. The Goron immediately regarded him with a sunny smile that was even brighter than Zelda’s, while the Rito turned sharp eyes upon him that, while not insanely intimidating, did make Link feel like prey. 

“Link, this is Lord Daruk and Revali. They’re the Goron and Rito ambassadors to my father, much in the same way as Urbosa is for the Gerudo and Mipha is for the Zora. They help bridge cultural divides and allow our company to interact as positively as possible with every race. Daruk, Revali, this is my head of guard, Sergeant Link Greene.” 

Link waved to them both, staring for several more seconds than needed at Revali, tilting his head up. He wasn’t going to entertain aggression but he was also not completely against reciprocating petty bitch behavior.

“Nice to meet you, little guy!” Daruk boomed in a voice far too loud for the setting, but that was to be expected from a Goron. When you live essentially outside, there’s no need for an inside voice.

Zelda placed the vase of flowers on her nightstand and settled back onto her bed, crossing her legs. Link leaned against a wall. “We were just catching up, I haven’t seen these two in months and they’ve known me since I was a little girl.”

Revali smirked. “And a brat you were. Always demanding I take you to the Rito districts in the city and fly you around and buy you mushroom skewers!”

Daruk laughed. “Doesn’t beat the times when she’d ask if I’d make her her own set of mini fireproof armor so she could go into the mines with me-in the middle of important meetings. I caved, but it took her a couple weeks.”

Zelda giggled, expression serene. “I still have that armor in my closet somewhere. It was lovely craftsmanship on your part.” Daruk’s chest puffed out with pride. Link smiled.

<>

Daruk and Revali’s visit was lovely, but they were at the Estate for a reason-they’d been called upon by her father. They’d been out on a survey for him for the past year-ish, and therefore were the only two that needed to be brought up to speed on the latest in Hyrule business and personal drama. By the time the breakfast bell was ringing throughout the house, Zelda’s ladies in waiting were getting antsy to pick out her outfit and do her hair (even though she could do her own fucking hair), so she had to send Daruk and Revali away.

Daruk crushed her into a spine-breaking hug, while Revali leaned in, eyes slitted. “I don’t trust this… Sergeant. His reluctance to speak tells me that something wicked this way comes. I don’t like it. I don’t like him.” He was always one for conspiracies and immediately hating people that outdid him in rank. Zelda pushed him away by the beak, snorting when his feathers ruffled.

“Silly bird.”

It was just her and Link after that (not counting her ladies in waiting). He had taken a book off of her shelf and was skimming it by the fireplace, left foot tapping rapid fire against the carpet. She knew immediately it was him avoiding her while not neglecting his duties. He got like this when he was nervous. Doubly nonverbal, staring at the floor or the ceiling, stimming by pulling at his clothes or rolling his neck or tapping his foot.

She fluttered around the room, showering and getting dressed and brushing her hair out and finally settling at her desk with her wedding binder. She’d picked a venue with Aldrich, a beautiful white chapel with a spring meant for ritualistic prayer to Hylia-something she’d been doing since she was old enough to walk, as it was part of her mother’s religion. The reception would be at the Estate. With that all settled, onto her latest troubles-her father had insisted he wait for her at the end with her groom as opposed to walking her down the aisle (he was making a lot of demands for someone who had completely removed himself from the planning process), which left her with no one to walk with her. Perhaps Sidon and Mipha could do it, or Impa, or Paya, or maybe Urbosa, her matron of honor, or if it came down to it, Link could hand her off-although he’d already agreed to help carry the train of her dress and her veil. 

“Link?” She called softly, and his eyes snapped up immediately to settle on the wall just above her head. “I don’t have anyone to walk me down the aisle. Would you be willing to hand me off if I can’t find someone else, or do you want to stick to handling my dress? Or do you not have a preference?”

He stayed silent, head tilting. She smiled. “I’ll take that as a lack of preference and you’d be honored to do either.” She turned back to her binder, its contents strewn across her desk.

She didn’t notice Link had gotten up and approached her until he was leaning over her shoulder to peer at the prototype guestlist. He made a surprised noise, a sweet little ‘oh!’, then pointed at one of the names. Beedle Bard, his friend who lived in Paris who she would’ve met if the foot traffic wasn’t so horrendous on their day out. She nodded, looking back at him. “I called him on the number I stole from your phone and inquired if he would design and make my jewelry for the wedding. He accepted quite enthusiastically. Plus I wanted you to have a friend around on what’s going to be a stressful and emotional day for all of us.” 

The surprise on his face glowed before he leaned in to press a lingering kiss to her hair. She gaped momentarily at his boldness, but smiled up at him. “You’re welcome. Consider it my apology gift.” For someone so outwardly stern and silent, he was quite physical and goofy with those he was close to. An arm around a junior guardsman as he adjusted their aim, a hand on Mipha’s shoulder when she laughed at some face he made, nuzzling one of the maid’s babies until they giggled, linking arms with a chef’s 6 year old daughter before swinging her around in a wide ballroom dance to the music in the dining room. 

He simply squeezed her tight around the shoulders before stepping away. Their fight was over, all was forgiven. Staring down at the wedding she had been despairing over for months, something felt brighter. She just wasn’t quite sure what yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> all i did while writing the chapter was listen to the fifth season on repeat. ‘you know they say that if its love you will know at once, they say you will know it without doubt or hesitation’ 
> 
> i always forget to mention it, but my tumblr is @nakkieyungs !! i mostly misc blog about anime kpop and zelda but i can post about my progress there as well, if youd like!!


	8. bitches love the 'gram and other trauma

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> noticed some of yall seemed to really like the social media aspects of this so i sprinkled more of that in here.
> 
> this chapter starts out really fun and silly but it does get dark and dramatic As Fuck pretty fast. i was gonna put a warning but its basically the entire last half of the chapter so.. if you're sensitive to gun violence PLEASE proceed with extreme caution. 
> 
> me, slamming my hands down on a table with violent intent: PLOT PLOT PLOT PLOT PLOT PLOT PLOT PL

“Darling!” Zelda cooed as Link shoved the camera away from his face, snorting. She laughed, and the frame shook as she aimed a teasing kick at him. “He’s a bit shy today. Well, he’s like this every day. Come here, Link.” He stared at her through the camera lense incredulously for a moment before rolling his eyes, but he came to her side and sat down on the bed by her socked feet. “Say hello,” She directed, grabbing his wrist and waving for him. She giggled at his completely flat expression. 

“Alright. He doesn’t wanna have fun with us,” She relented, rolling over on her bed as she turned her phone back her way. Link curled back up against the headboard with his book. The hearts in the righthand corner exploded at the sight of her face once more, along with compliments that still never failed to make her blush. And some mean stuff, but she could handle a little classic celebrity cyberbullying. “I’ve been taking a break from planning my wedding. My father’s been so useless besides providing the, you know, endless cash flow. I’m too prissy to let anyone else help me. I want it to be simple like nothing else in my life ever is, but since there’s probably going to be 500 guests minimum, a certain elegance is expected of me. I’m so freaked out, but Aldrich has been so lovely, we saw each other last night,” She rambled, pausing to read a few comments. “Yes, there’s a theme. It’s floral with blues and golds incorporated. We’re gonna have a private ceremony at a chapel with a spring for prayer like my mum used when she was alive, and then a big public reception at the house. I’m not a big fan of picking Silent Princesses, since they’re endangered, but in honor of mum I’ll have probably like three from my family’s personal garden in my bouquet, and then one for Aldrich’s lapel. White daisies for my hair, maybe? Link’s really good at hairstyling for some reason, so he’ll probably help me weave them in.”

Link peeked into view at the sound of his name, ears pricked, but sat back again with disinterest as Zelda moved onto the next question. “‘You’re cute today?’ Ha, thank you. I’m cute every day,” She winked, then snorted at herself. “Ah, I haven’t really even shown anyone outside family and friends the ring,” She held her hand up, allowing the hunk of diamond to catch the light. “Beautiful, isn’t it? It was Aldrich’s grandmother’s, a Terron family heirloom. I’ll be sure to post pictures soon, I just didn’t want to seem like one of those girls on Facebook who won’t shut up about the size of her rock.”

Link laughed, a loud, sharp ‘ha!’. “What’s so funny?” She called over her shoulder, figuring he’d read something amusing.

He leaned in to press his lips almost directly to her ear, barely whispering “the size of your rock,” and then sitting back, snickering. She stared at him in silence for a moment.

“You’re a child. Guys, he’s a fucking child. Come and assassinate me because this toddler will be helpless to stop any of it,” He kicked her leg, she kicked back. “I shouldn't joke about that actually.” 

She peered at the comments again. “‘I’m a girl but can I wife you?’ If you can buy me a ring that beats this one we’ll definitely talk. I like sapphires more than diamonds, so there’s your first hint,” Instagram beeped at her. Sidon was up and requesting to join her live. “Should I let Sidon in here? He’s been annoying lately.” She was met with a chorus of ‘yes’s.

The screen split and Sidon’s topmost fin came into view, then her favorite shark’s left eye. “Where is my husband?” He demanded sharply. Link came back into view to wave. Sidon waved back. “Gay rights.” Link’s hand tightened into a fist of solidarity, and he pumped it once before flopping back down.

“Now that you’ve been sated, what do you want, slut?” Zelda asked, tapping her nails against her cheek. 

“I want to provide commentary. A sick ass beatbox to go along with your words, perhaps. Bring the 80’s synth wave tunes. The remastered version of ‘Out of Touch’ by Daryl Hall and John Oates.”

“It’s nine in the morning. I still haven’t had breakfast. I really can’t.”

“It’s seven here. Sure you can.”

“Where’s your sister?”

Sidon had the audacity to look offended. “Is your best friend not enough for you?”

“Mipha’s my best friend too. All of my close friends are my best friends.”

Sidon snorted, and it sounded like a disgruntled horse. “That’s lame as fuck.”

“You’re lame as fuck. I can’t believe I let you turn my scheduled live into a facetime call.”

“It’s what the audience wants! The fish! The cod! The tuna!” Most Zora found referring to them as random species of fish (or ‘fish’ at all) offensive, but of course Sidon would do it to himself, on her live.

“Anyways, you didn’t text much yesterday. What did you do last night?”

“Oh, listened to some sad gay songs. Cried and used my tears as moisturizer because the salt’s good for the skin. The usual. You?”

“We literally had a conversation about it? Link and I yelled at each other in an open hallway in front of other people and now it’s being used as fodder for employee drama even though we made up this morning.” Link made an offronted noise.

“Oh. Cool. I forgot. Now I remember. I made fun of you in your time of distress and need.”

“You did.”

“Bitches be nosy?” He inquired.

“Bitches be nosy,” She confirmed seriously. “Listen, I don’t think this is entertaining for anyone but us. I’m ending this live because you ruined it and I’ll text you later, okay?”

“Ugh, fine. Love you,” He blew a kiss. She caught it.

“Love you too. Bye guys.” She gave a little wave and cut it off there.

She fell backward, resting her head on Link’s leg. She squished her cheek into his calf. “Wanna go get breakfast and then really talk about last night?”

He hummed wordlessly, then a low murmur of ‘sure’, not once looking up from his book. “I was listening to that whole thing. You keep referring to Sir Aldrich as if you’ve known him for forever when you literally just met yesterday.”

She picked at a loose thread on his jeans. His American accent was never as prevalent as it was when he was wearing a t-shirt and denim. It was hard to place the dialect in which he spoke, since he had to follow his parents from military base to military base. Some words had Queens in them, others Houston. “Yeah, but the public isn’t supposed to know that this is arranged. It might be obvious to some, but we’re never supposed to outright confirm it. The gala where my father chose my groom was staged as a fashion event to the media. Even my father knows arranged marriages are a bit… primitive, even for rich people, but that’s just the way he’s always planned it-to secure me a good life leading Hyrule Tech, I suppose. The public would not agree with that logic and would argue in my stead that I have the right to choose who I love. He doesn’t want that sort of power behind me.” 

He put his book down. It was a collection of Ernest Hemingway’s short stories, one of her mother’s favorites. “What do you think about that logic?” He asked quietly.

“I’ll maybe grow to love Aldrich?” She winced. “We’ll be each other’s companions, for sure, probably friends someday. He’s a powerful man who will protect me socially in the ways that I cannot protect myself, and I’m fairly certain he won’t hurt me. ‘A powerful woman needs a powerful man’ and all that. Having royal ties won’t hurt my image and I’ll definitely need help running the company. He’s not the man I want to marry, but a small part of me hopes that maybe someday he will be?”

He reached down to tentatively stroke at her hair. “Don’t care about his intentions or benefits, your age gap is creepy and gross and I don’t like it.” She laughed softly. 

“I know. But what’s done is done and not worth your worrying and wherever I go you’ll be there to protect me. Now let’s go eat.”

<>

Breakfast was in full swing, considering it was almost 10 o’clock. Link’s guards nursing hangover headaches in a dark corner, her ladies in waiting, headed by Marionne and Giselle, giggling at a table and whispering rumors and gossip to each other, the Gerudo women sparring together as entertainment for themselves and everyone else, and the children shrieking and running underfoot. A little Gerudo made grabby hands at Link, and he picked her up and swung her around before adjusting her in his arms. Someone had a guitar and was singing loudly. Zelda’s father was at the head table, speaking with Revali and Daruk. Aldrich was listening in politely. Everyone was still in their pajamas.

Breakfast on Saturdays was a joyous time at the estate. Nobody truly worked until around 11 in the morning. It had been a tradition started by Mrs. Hyrule, and carried on as an homage to her. Many people called them ‘Sheila Saturdays’ (Sheila being her mum’s name), like it was a breakfast special. And it kind of was.

Link tapped her arm with his free hand and gestured towards the buffet style table. “A blueberry muffin and eggs over hard, please,” She said, and they parted ways temporarily. She took a seat between Aldrich and her father, smiling shyly at her fiancé. 

“Where’s the Sergeant?” Her father spoke, not even bothering to greet her.

“He went to go get us both food,” She answered primly, hands folded in her lap. He nodded shortly and went back to talking to Daruk and Revali.

“How did you sleep?” Aldrich asked, but the second she opened her mouth to answer, several sharp pops rang out across the dining hall. A Zora woman shrieked as the man next to her toppled over. 

“Hit the deck!” Daruk roared. 

It clicked in everyone’s heads what was happening almost simultaneously, and panic shattered the joy that had permeated the room.

“Link!” Zelda screamed, but he was nowhere to be found. Too many people had started moving at once. She swiveled around frantically, but her father shoved her under the table before joining her. He acted as shield around her, protecting her from almost all sides. She clung to her father’s lapel, too panicked to relish in the love he rarely exhibited. More shots rang out, and she sobbed loudly at the sound of her people screaming. A glass shattered on the table above, and orange juice began dripping down onto the floor in front of her. 

Like an apparition, Link was suddenly ducking under the table at her side, grimacing silently. She made an animalistic, relieved noise, pressing her forehead to his temple. He leaned into the motion, shushing her quietly.

“It’s a Yiga man and woman. I think they snuck in disguised as Hylians. I’m hit,” He reported loudly to Mr. Hyrule, louder than she’d ever heard him speak before. He was holding a bloody napkin to his leg. She immediately reached down to help him put pressure on it. He hissed, but didn’t protest, even when she put more weight on him sobbing into his shirt.

“Are we returning fire?” Daruk asked.

“My boys and girls are. I’ll be out to help them in a second.” 

“Like fucking hell you will! There’s a bullet in your fucking leg!” Zelda hissed.

“Has someone called the police?!” Aldrich yelled over the sound of a bullet hitting the wall behind them. 

“Fuck if I fucking know!” Link snapped back.

As the men under the table argued, Zelda stared at her lap, vision blurry. There was blood on Link’s shirt, on his pants, on her hands, wrists, arms, on her face and in her hair, which was already sticky with orange juice. Blood mixed with tears on her face.

Another flurry of shots rang out, and then it went deathly quiet. All Zelda could hear was the harsh breathing of their little group.

Then the tablecloth concealing them lifted. Link immediately moved to put himself in front of her, but it was just Galli, looking quite ruffled. “We killed them. They’re dead. We’re securing the building but right now it’s safe to come out.”

She looked up at the Rito, still sobbing. “Have someone find Impa and Paya or so help me God I will leave this dining hall and find them myself.” 

“Like hell you will,” Link muttered, using her own words against her. 

Galli nodded. “I’ll bet you someone’s already on that but I’ll make sure of it. Come out, Mr. Hyrule, Miss Hyrule, it’s okay now.”

Everyone else crawled out but she didn’t move from Link’s side. “He’s been shot,” She spoke loudly, even to her own ears. She meant for it to sound authorative but it just sounded like a little girl trying to make herself seem bigger. “I don’t think it’s immediately life threatening but I-I don’t know.” 

Galli looked around. “Okay, okay. We’ve got about a dozen wounded, none dead yet and the cops and ambulances are on their way. It’s gonna be okay guys, I promise it’s gonna be fine.”

Mr. Hyrule ducked down, face grave. “Zelda, when you get out from under there, I want you blindfolded or I want someone covering your eyes. You have no reason to see this.” 

“I see what everyone else has to see,” She replied sharply. Her father merely turned to Link.

“If you don’t make an attempt to cover her eyes you’re fired.”

“Yes sir.”

<>

Someone found him a pair of scissors out of a lady’s bag and he cut a few strips of tablecloth, one to tie around Zelda’s eyes and one to wrap around his leg. Unlike Zelda’s initial thoughts of a bullet being in his leg, it appeared he’d gotten off with a graze. That still sucked, but, as they say, ‘tis but a flesh wound. 

As soon as he secured the strip around Zelda’s eyes, he guided her out into Galli’s waiting wings. She turned back towards him, eyes searching blindly, eyebrows creased with confusion and growing panic. “Galli’s gonna take you outside. I’m staying here to wait for the ambulance.”

She was immediately upset (he’d just gotten her to calm down, damn it). “No, I’m staying with you.” 

“You know you can’t. It’s not safe here and I can’t take you where it is.”

Zelda made a wordless noise of frustration. “I go where you go.” 

He stroked a comforting thumb over her cheek, and she leaned into it, brows softening. He patted Galli’s back with the other hand. “Go, Galli.” 

She shrieked an infuriated ‘motherfucker!’ as the Rito took off with her, leaving him alone. He was so gonna get it later. 

He crawled (more like used his upper body to drag his lower half) out into the open and immediately wished he hadn’t.

The always joyous dining hall had been completely wrecked. A fine layer of drinks, blood and general stickiness covered the floor, and there was broken glass essentially everywhere. The guitar that had been played with so much zest just 5 minutes before laid broken and abandoned on the ground. Two Sheikah bodies lay crumpled on the floor by the door, the Sheikah symbol mockingly turned upside down all over their bodies-printed on clothes, tattoos, jewelry, with guns the length of Link’s arm laying listless at their sides. Several voices sobbed and screamed from the hallway. All he could do was stare blankly at it all. 

Galli returned shortly after, Zelda-less. “Her room got ransacked. You guys left just in time. They set her bed on fire. They started there and when they couldn't find her they came here.” 

He dragged a hand down his face. “Is everyone accounted for, at least?” 

“Yeah, headcount’s good,” He leaned down to look Link in the eye. “I know it must be hard to be talking so much, especially during something that must take you back. It’s been so helpful, thank you, but you can go now. It’s okay, Sarg. Everyone’s safe, Miss Hyrule’s safe. You did good.”

And like Galli had flipped an ‘off’ switch, he shut down.

<>

Zelda stood in the middle of her mother’s patch of Silent Princesses, letting the wind sweep her hair over her shoulders and take away the sounds of sirens and weeping and yelling. 

“Miss Hyrule!” Someone calls, and she whips her head around to face Galli, who stops short at the edge of the patch. 

“Link?” Is all she says, and he nods. 

“He’s gone into shock but he’s okay, we loaded him up, he’s going to the hospital. He’s okay.”

“Impa? Paya?”

“Also fine. They heard the commotion and barricaded themselves in the library.” 

“Lord Daruk and Revali?”

“Completely okay. Police are taking their statements.”

“Gisele and Marionne? My ladies?” 

“All twenty accounted for and safe. Iti was hit in the shoulder but she’s gonna be okay.”

“Aldrich? My father?” 

“Freaked the fuck out but otherwise fine.” 

She stumbles out of the patch, careful not to crush any flowers even in her haze. Galli catches her, and she clings. He runs his beak along her head, picking debris out of her hair. The grooming is caring and heartbreaking and she starts to cry once more.

“Why did this happen? Why? Why?” 

“We don’t know yet. Probably an assassination attempt. You were most likely a target, Sarg may have been one too.”

“Zelda!” An old voice shrieks, and Galli releases her so Impa and Paya can slam into her at full speed.

They sink to the ground into a group hug, sobbing with whispered ‘I love you’s. Impa scatters kisses along Zelda’s face, and she can’t stop a bit of relieved laughter from escaping.

“Nobody’s dead. We’re so fucking lucky,” Zelda marvels, and Paya nods, even as Impa quietly chastises her for her language. “What kind of shitty terrorist attack was that supposed to be?”

<>

She can’t stand to go back to her destroyed room, so she bathes in the pool. She scrubs at her skin until it’s bright red and reeks of chlorine instead of blood, sweat, and tears, slams her head underwater and holds her eyelids open until she can barely see to get the sight of broken glass and orange juice puddling with blood and snapped guitar strings out of her eyes. She swims to the bottom of the pool and sits, letting the static silence of the water drown out the sound of gunfire, Link’s hisses of pain, screaming and her own sobs until she’s afraid she herself will drown. 

When she surfaced, wiping at her face, Link is standing at the edge of the pool. She shrieks and slaps an arm over her boobs, sinking lower. He stares at her incredulously for a moment, then puts two and two together. He gasps and swivels around, clapping a hand over his eyes. “Get out! Get the fuck out! What the fuck!” She yelled.

“I thought you had a swimsuit on! I’m sorry!” He yelled back, limping out into the hallway.

Zelda emerged from the pool, entire body rubbed raw and red, and now flushed further with embarrassment. She mechanically puts on a blue blouse and jeans, not even bothering to dry herself off. Her clothing sticking unpleasantly to her skin would be yet another welcome stimulatory distraction. “You can come back in now.”

He shuffles back in, ears firetruck red. He takes one look at her and turns right back around. “Your blouse is see through. That’s not an improvement at all.” 

She flops stomach down on one of the pool chairs, concealing her entire front. “I’ve laid down. My chastity has now been protected.”

He sighed and turned back around, then hobbled over to sit on the chair next to her. “Why are you skinny dipping?”

She shrugged, picking at her nails. “I have to bathe somewhere and I didn’t want to go back to my room. There’s lots of other bathrooms in the house but I like the pool. And now I smell like chlorine instead of blood.” 

He tsked, then laid down beside her.

“How’s your leg, my darling?” She asked, turning her head to take a peek, but he’d changed into grey sweatpants, concealing his wound from view. He shrugged.

“Just a graze, should heal pretty well as long as I keep changing the dressing. Gonna be a gnarly scar though. And I have a limp,” They stared at his leg for a while before he turned back to her, face grave. “Are you alright?”

“Oh, I’m traumatized for sure,” She joked weakly. He didn’t laugh. “But seriously, I’m probably gonna go into therapy and stuff. That was… a lot.” 

“You should probably, like, post to social media or something. Your stans are freaking the fuck out.”

She wrinkled her nose. “Don’t call them my ‘stans’. Gross. Anyways, come here, let’s take a picture.” She grabbed her phone off the ground and scooted closer until they were shoulder to shoulder. She squished their faces together and managed a small smile. 

They look… terrible. Exhausted, completely drained, and their smiles look fake. The dark circles around their eyes told a story of their own. Her eyes were red with chlorine and her hair was soaked and frizzy. Link’s bun was lopsided and tangled.

‘Welp. We look awful but we’ve had quite the day. We don’t know much about why yet but my family and friends were attacked by two gunmen this morning when we gathered for breakfast. Everyone is fine and there were no casualties, thank Hylia. My brave Sarg here got shot in the leg protecting me, but he’s doing well. He and his team showed so much strength protecting us today and I am so incredibly grateful. I love everyone around myself and my family, regardless of whether they’re employees, friends, or both, beyond words and I am so grateful to be able to say we all came out of it in one piece. We’ll be taking the time leading up to my wedding healing and picking up the pieces, so I may not be very active on my socials, but please know I am completely fine (physically at least) and just keeping to myself. Love you all lots and thank you for the concern you have shown my family and I. XO, Zelda (and Link)’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stream bts' studio album 'map of the soul: 7'


	9. like real people do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Honey just put your sweet lips on my lips  
We should just kiss like real people do

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> who wants to go to ikea and then get slapped by her dad??????? zelda doesnt

beedle: what if you

beedle: and this is batshit fucking crazy but hear me out

beedle: what if you took her to a frat party at nyu on friday night????? loosen her up a bit around people her age i think it would do her rly good she sounds so wound up

Me: yeah dude thats batshit fucking crazy

Me: id get fired

beedle: BUT IT WOULD BE WORTH IT

beedle: show d baby a good time if anyone deserves it she does esp after what you guys have been through like????? private british high school. girl has never known a red solo cup filled with alcohol based acid and it shows!!!!!!!!!

beedle: if u dont propose it i will CALL HER and tell her my idea

Me: dont. zel will love it immediately and whine at me

Me: u dont have to face the puppy eyes and begging do not do this to me

beedle: ring ring bitch. tell her about beedle bards genius plan or ring ring bitch

Me: ITS NOT EVEN A FUCKING PLAN UR JUST TELLING ME TO TAKE HER SOMEWHERE WITHOUT WORKING OUT ANY OF THE LOGISTICS OR INHERENT RISKS IN DOING SO

beedle: ring ring bitch

Link sighed. He would kill that man someday, he really would. He knew that if he put his foot down, Beedle wouldn’t call Zel and tell her she should beg him to take her to a party hosted by a frat from a college that neither of them attended. It was just the sort of teenager bullshit that neither of them had ever been permitted to partake in. Goddess, it was just BEGGING for trouble.

He sort of loved it. 

“Hello, darling!” Zelda called as she entered her bedroom, trailed by her ladies. He hummed. She’d attended a meeting with the most trusted feminine (and effeminate) figures in her life to be advised about her wedding, and, if her sunny disposition was anything to go by, cheeks flushed and eyes bright with wine, it had gone swimmingly. “I snuck you a flask of apple pie white wine. I know you love it,” She said, reaching into her shirt and pulling a shiny silver flask out of her bra. It was warm and slightly slick with boob sweat, but he accepted it gratefully regardless, wiping it down with the end of his shirt. 

She sat down beside him, kicking off her black kitten heels and sending them flying. One of her diamond earrings jingled against his ear, and she laughed when it flicked irritatedly, giving it a little tug. She set her head on his shoulder, huffing. “I am so fucking sick of sleeping on the floor.”

“I know. Me too.” He whispered back.

Since Zelda’s bed had been destroyed and her room ransacked the week prior, they both were sleeping on little mattresses on the ground, hers at the foot of her used-to-be bed and his practically against the door, so no one could enter or exit in the night without him knowing all about it. He usually had his own quarters to return to at night that he’d made cozy and all his own, far down the hall from Zelda’s master bedroom, but Mr. Hyrule had ramped up security around his family and faculty considerably, and for good reason. 

Zel had been struggling to sleep, so they’d been having slumber parties. Some nights, in the early hours of the morning, he’d hear her jerk awake from some ‘wretched thought’ (as she called them, instead of, you know, nightmares), and then he’d feel her slide onto the other side of his mattress. She never touched him, or even got very close at all, but he could hear her breathing calm as soon as they were in closer proximity, and she’d drift off again. So he never objected.

And before her ladies came to rouse them both in the morning, she’d wake up and slip back into her own bed. 

“Father says the carpenter will be another two weeks, but at this point I just want to go to Ikea,” She said, reaching across his lap for the remote to start flipping through channels. 

“So… let’s go then. Your life, your bed,” He replied after swiveling his ears around to assure her ladies weren’t within earshot.

Zeda groaned. “No, I couldn’t, I have too much planning still to do. Invitations have to go out by Friday, and I still don’t have an officiant that Father approves of, and I have a therapy appointment tonight-”

“Zel, not to be rude or dismissive of your wedding and healing process, but you have time for an hour long run to a furniture warehouse to buy a bedframe and a mattress so you don’t have to sleep on the fucking floor.” 

“Goddess, fine, fine. You’re so pushy.”

“Sure, I’m the pushy one.”

<>

His red pickup truck had always been a sight for sore eyes, even when it was brand new. Zelda didn’t seem to mind though, chattering on about a journal she’d read recently while sticking her head out of the window to let the late fall breeze catch her hair. They’d fibbed hard to run this errand as just the two of them-Link had taken his lunch break and Zelda had told her ladies she was going to take a nap, ordered them to not let anyone disturb her, and shoved them out the door. Then she jumped out of her first floor window to meet him and they ran snickering and hand in hand across the front lawn to the employee parking garage. 

“Where’s your apartment?” She asked suddenly, hair still streaming out the window.

He hummed. “Hell’s Kitchen. It’s kind of a disaster even by Hell’s Kitchen standards, but I’ll take you there someday.” 

She smiled wickedly. “And what do you plan to do with me once you get me there and we’re all alone with nothing to do, fiend?” 

He resolutely ignored her innuendo. “Fiend? What are you, an 18th century poet?” 

“British private school, remember?”

He nodded. “Right.”

They were quiet for a moment as Zelda stretched her legs out to put them in Link’s lap as he drove, then she spoke again. “You never told me all of what my father said to you. We never talked about it.”

He inhaled deeply, exhaled shortly. “He told me that we were too close for comfort, that it was no longer ‘useful’ for him, whatever that means. If I didn’t back up, didn’t stop doing exactly what we’re doing right now,” He flicked her ankle, “I’d lose my job, we’d never see or speak to each other again, and he’d make it very hard for me to get back into armed service.” 

“You know I’d never let him do that,” She spoke softly, and he had to roll up the window to hear the end of her sentence. The sudden cutoff of ambient noise in the car was slightly awkward. 

“What kind of power do you have, Zelda, that would prevent your billionaire father from firing me, keeping us apart forever, and barring me from the military?”

She held her chin up, regal with something fierce and cold in her eyes. “More than you believe I do, clearly. Link,” She leaned toward him conspiratorially, like she was about to tell him a well kept secret. “I have something he doesn’t. Public favor. My father is hated by most. I am not. When I was eleven years old, my ladies helped me start a secret collection of every piece of evidence of abuse we could get our hands on. Nine years of carefully documented domestic violence. Dangle that shit over his head-” She snapped her fingers. “-he’s done, darling. I’ve never used it, and he doesn’t know about it.” 

He chuckled, incredulous. “You sure are my yellow rose.” 

She smiled, bright and wide. “Your Silent Princess, more like.”

“Silent, you are not.”

“Shut the fuck up. So… What do you think?”

He puffed his cheeks out, then exhaled sharply. “I don’t know, all I know is that I trust you and if you think that’s enough to protect us both, so do I. I promise, I won’t walk away.”

Her ears fluttered as they turned red. “I trust you, too.”

“Good.”

“Yes. Good.” 

<>

Ikea was packed, but not terribly so. They chatted idly as they wandered through the store, careful not to attract attention-Zelda wasn’t exactly in disguise. “So… Beedle and I were talking earlier, and he suggested something we could do this weekend to unwind.”

She tilted her head towards him, squinting. “Go on.” 

“He wants me to take you to a frat party at NYU and let you experience being a normal college kid for a night. He says it’ll be good for you-” Her grip on his arm turned vice like as her eager eyes sparkled up at him. 

“It will be good for me. What a wonderful idea, I can’t believe I didn’t think to bully you into it sooner!” 

Link grunts. “Yeah, but is it? How the hell am I supposed to protect you at a frat party?”

“I’ll dress differently, do my makeup differently, go by a fake name, and you can pretend to be my boyfriend or something, duh.”

“I’m not going to fake date you. This isn’t a romcom.”

She spun away from him, almost crashing into an older woman going the opposite direction. He winced and made a grab for her. She sidestepped it. “Life is what you make it, darling, and fuck if mine isn’t going to be an adventure,” She spun closer again. “Take me or I’ll steal your car and go alone.” 

“Jesus, Zelda, you are not gonna steal my car.” 

She latched to the side of the cart he was pushing, stepping up onto the bottom part like she was six years old and leaning up into his face. “Watch me.” 

He rolled his eyes and leaned to the side, still trying to steer. “Move, I can’t see past your fat fucking head.”

She gasped loudly and feigned clutching for her pearls, still catching a ride on the cart. “Don’t be fucking rude. Look, we’ll be discussing this later, make no mistake.”

“Fine.”

She smirked at him, then peered around at all the furniture and people, ears perked with curiosity. He’d forgotten she’d probably very rarely, if ever, gone shopping for herself, especially among ‘common folk’. She inhaled sharply, then hopped off the cart and pulled so he made a sharp left towards the infant and toddler section. He made a noise, but didn’t pull back on course. They had time.

She stopped in front of a cradle on display, crooning as she spun the little mobile, eyes soft and sweet. It was made for a Zora baby, the price tag proudly announcing the crib was waterproof and could be filled with water to any of the marked levels. “I remember when Sidon and Mipha’s cousins were this small,” She murmured, placing her cheek in her hand as she spun the mobile around with the other.

Zelda moved onto a crib made for Hylian toddlers, tugging him along. The heiress reached into it, elegant hand closing around a clunky baby teething toy. “I have a serious case of baby fever,” She proclaimed as she turned the toy over in her palms, nails scraping curiously along the textured surface.

“Careful. You’re a baby yourself.” She rolled her eyes as she dropped the teething toy back into the crib, straightening it back into its original position in the display. 

“I’m just saying that a family of my own would be nice someday. I wish it was on my terms, but…” She straightened, face blank. “I will work with the cards I was dealt. Despite my misfortune, billionaire status isn’t a bad card to have. I’ll take it.” 

Link cocked his head. “What kind of family do you want?” She tapped her bottom lip, thinking for a moment.

“I don’t actually want to marry, even if it’s to my soulmate. It seems to ruin even true love. I want a small, private, unofficial ceremony declaring that we’re partners for as long as we will have each other without all the theatrics and paperwork. I want just… a gaggle of little boys. Three, maybe. I’ll work a baby girl in there when the boys are older. I’m definitely a boy mom.”

He tsked. “See, I think I’m a girl dad. I don’t know how to interact with other men but I can spoil the shit out of some daughters.”

“I believe you. You’ve treated me well,” She laughed. “We’ll just have to have a big family, then.” 

He stared at her for a full five seconds before she realized what she’d said. Her entire face, ears included, immediately turned firetruck red. She flapped her hands around, flustered. “Oh my god. That’s not what I meant at all. I just meant that-that we’ll both have to have big families to fulfill our desires as parents, that’s all! I didn’t mean to insinuate that you’d want a family with me. Silly me, a Freudian slip of the tongue, poorly worded on my part, really-”

He squeezed her arm. “Zel, it’s okay. I get it. We’re cool.” Her mouth clicked shut and she nodded stoutly, but her face still simmered. 

As they made their way in silence to the bed frames, Link pondered over what a family with Zelda would be like. For all of her faults and slight immaturities, she’d grow to be a wonderful, doting mother, compassionate and devoted to her family, if that was the path she decided to take. But she’d have a separate life from them-she’d cringed at the thought of being a stay at home mom like her father had always envisioned. A professional career in biological sciences would fit her like one of her custom made evening gowns. Him as a stay at home dad while his lovely princess went out and kicked ass, however… He could see it, almost clear as day.

He’d never considered himself a potential housedad, but the more he thought about it, the less he could see himself leaving his hypothetical family with Zelda for life at war. Leaving Zelda’s side at all was practically null and void at this point, never mind if she was eating for two.

God, when Sir Aldrich started his family with her, as was both of their obligations, Link was pretty sure he’d go absolutely batshit fucking feral protecting any of Zelda’s spawn. Hyrule genes were strong, and the family had been an influential matriarchy, wealthy for different reasons depending on the generation, for actual, literal centuries. Sheila Hyrule’s life being cut short was the only reason her husband was in charge-Mrs. Hyrule was the genius behind everything. If she hadn’t died at only 29, she would be his boss, and no doubt her daughter would be a very different girl. He’d seen Zelda’s family tree, it hung in the main hallway-a long line of eldest daughters with Zelda’s abnormally long ears, sharp, intelligent eyes, and full-lipped smile. Everything else varied-like her great-great-great grandmother Esmer’s striking jet black hair-but the ears, lips, and smile never wavered. No doubt Zelda’s children, girl or boy, would inherit the family’s most priceless genetics.

He smirked to himself. He was gonna be so annoying with them.

By the time he had fully checked back in, Zelda had been talking with an employee about the bed frame and mattress she liked for a solid five minutes. The employee was tapping away rapid fire at his little tablet, trying to figure out what part of the warehouse they needed to go to to drag their bigass box of parts out of here. “Aisle fifteen,” He finally said. Zelda thanked him curtly and started walking. He jogged lightly to keep up with her. 

She was avoiding eye contact, looking downtrodden with her arms crossed as she walked. “Are you mad at me?” He spoke softly, leaning into her space and flicking the tip of her ear with his own. She huffed.

“No. I’m mad at myself. I don’t like it when I say stupid shit.”

“It wasn’t stupid. You just implied something you didn’t mean to imply. It happens. It’s okay. I know you didn’t mean it like that.”

<>

She totally meant it like that.

With all the pictures she’d taken of Link bouncing babies in his lap, rocking them to sleep, and dancing with them, he had to be fucking oblivious. Link was attentive, protective, handsome, kind, and he loved kids. What was a young woman to think of that? Was she just supposed to ignore it? No way. 

They drove in silence back to the estate, his eyes flicking constantly to the rearview mirror, keeping tabs on the box in the bed of his truck. She was lost in thought as they dragged the box through a back door, into a service elevator, and into her room. 

Cassy, Iti, and Flora were sitting in the living room, waiting for her to wake up from her supposed nap. Flora jumped and shrieked at the sight of them, and Zelda smiled broadly. “Surprise. We went shopping.”

Iti put her head in her hands. “A stroke. One of these days I am going to have a stroke.”

Zelda laughed sheepishly and embraced her hunched over form, careful not to jostle her shoulder. “Don’t worry. I took Link with me.”

“Oh, you took unarmed Limping Sargeant Link with you. This is the height of security detailing,” Cassy remarked sarcastically. Link glared at the back of her head. 

“Don’t tell Father? Please? For me?” 

Flora pointed a jokingly accusing finger at Link, who was already taking a knife to the box of furniture parts. “You bring out the absolute worst in her, you enabler! We’re all gonna get fired one of these days, helping Mistress have an actual life. I hate you so damn much. I do not like you, Sam I Am.”

Link frowned at her, then down at the mess of wooden parts in the box. He took out a pen and tore a piece of paper off the notepad on the coffee table, scribbling a note and holding it up.

‘HOW AM I GONNA DO THIS?’

“I ask myself that question every day when I first wake up,” Zelda answered bluntly. Iti squealed and kicked her legs, amused.

“Jesus.” muttered Cassy, mood clearly soured. 

Link hummed, something he often did when he was either annoyed, had something to say but didn’t want to say it, or he wanted to laugh but was trying to stay serious. It could be any of the three, really. It was also his standard greeting, but that didn’t apply here. Zelda interfered with his efforts then, rising and taking the sheet of instructions from him. “You don’t have to do that all by yourself. I’ll have someone come help us later. Come sit with us, I don’t want to watch you struggle to put legs on a bed frame for the rest of the night.”

Flora whined. “But that would be so entertaining!’

Gisele and Marionne entered silently, failing to announce themselves (as is the unspoken rule when entering bedrooms in the estate). Zelda opened her mouth to greet them cheerily, but their serious expressions stopped her short. 

“Mr. Hyrule requests the presence of Mistress and the Sergeant.”

She and Link glanced at each other.

This did not bode well.

Fucky fuck.

<>

Mr. Hyrule took one look at Zelda and slapped her hard across the face. She made a noise like a kicked puppy, high and clipped, before crumpling.

Link made a move to catch her, but Mr. Hyrule raised a hand. It gave him pause long enough for Zel to hit the ground, cradling her face as her shoulders shook. “Do not touch her.”

He shrunk to the ground slowly, eye contact with the older man unwavering until he was right behind the heiress, close enough to curl his pinky around hers on the hand that had landed behind her in an attempt to break her fall. He wanted to cry as his wound burned to the point where he thought it would bubble over and implode.

“The PR disaster the two of you have caused today is almost incomprehensible,” Mr. Hyrule started, scrolling on his tablet until he found what he wanted, before flipping it towards them. “Take a look at what you’ve done.” 

Pictures of them in Ikea. Someone had recognized Zelda and snapped pictures. Incriminating ones, at that. Most notably, them leaning over a bassinet and smiling softly at each other, mid-conversation. Her leaning into his face as she rode on the side of the cart. Their ears brushing fondly as they walked down an aisle.

Zelda’s hair still waterfalled over her face, and she clearly had no intention of looking up.

“Look, Zelda,” Mr. Hyrule ordered sharply, grabbing at her chin and yanking her head up so sharply Link had to snap his own head back to avoid getting hit in the nose. “I can hardly find the words.”

Zelda sobbed. “We were just looking-”

“These pictures don’t suggest ‘just looking’. They suggest you are a dirty infidel and expecting out of wedlock,” Mr. Hyrule spit. “The papers are having a fit. Read the comments, too, if you must.” He thrusted the tablet at both of them. Link took it gingerly, half expecting to be shot.

‘Star-Crossed Lovers?’ The cheesy gossip column suggested in bold capitals. Link scoffed quietly. The pictures were romantically suggestive, sure, but it was clear by the length of the article (a few choppy paragraphs) that there was little to go off of, journalism wise. The comments ranged from sly and joking to calling them both sluts.

‘I don’t blame her for a second. Aldrich Terron is waaaaaaay too old and her security detail is a hot piece of ass. She CLEARLY isn’t in love with the old bat. She’s being forced into it, but she clearly has something going on with this guy, who’s much more appropriate for her. Who wouldn’t take the plunge? I know I would.’

‘i also choose this chicks security guard’

‘Oh COME ON. They’re clearly just friends browsing together, besides the fact that if he’s her security guard he HAS TO GO WITH HER EVERYWHERE? HELLO? They left with a bed frame??? Didn’t you guys see her bed got destroyed last week?????? They went to get her a new bed. Obviously they’ve become close friends. I literally don’t see the issue.’

‘the pretty ones always end up shitting on every man in her life. a damn shame shes hot asf’

‘Yall r fucking gross. She almost died last week and this is what we r gonna talk about. A trip to IKEA. I hate yall’

‘do we know if she needs any more security guards (cough dudes to keep the left side of her bed warm during her engagement) asking for a friend’ 

He rolled his eyes at every comment. “Not to be prude, sir, but I don't see the problem? It’s a lame gossip column and most of the comments are either jokes or supportive,” He spoke quietly and calmly, but really he wanted to stab the old bastard in the foot.

“And there are thousands more just like it. This will be top news tomorrow, no doubt,” Mr. Hyrule snapped. “You-” 

He pointed at Zelda, who whimpered and shrunk closer to Link, fully grabbing his hand. 

“You’re going to fix this. I don’t care if you have to appear on every talk show in the country for the next week, you’re going to go on air in front of everyone and clear your name and declare your love for your fiancé. Publicly distance yourself from the Sergeant or there will be consequences. Do you understand?” Zelda nodded.

“Say it. Say you understand.”

“I understand.” She blubbered.

“And you,” He turned his accusatory finger towards Link. “You’re suspended for a month. Don’t even bother finishing your shift tonight, I want you out of this house. Go home. If you attempt to contact my daughter or vice versa during that time, even through third parties, trust me when I say I will find out and you will be fired. Do you understand?”

“Yes sir.”

“Now both of you get out. If I catch you on the house cameras more than five minutes from now, I will beat you bloody.”

He grabbed Zelda’s arm and hauled ass out of the office.

As soon as the door slammed behind them, Zelda grabbed his face and pressed her forehead to his. “I miss you so much already,” She whispered, voice cracking. 

“I know. I miss you too.” 

She grabbed his hands next, rubbing her thumbs along his knuckles. “I’ll write you every chance I get, okay? Letters, like on paper. Sidon will get them to you.”

“I trust you, you know that? I know you won’t get us in trouble?”

She smiled. It was weak and watery. “I trust you too. Go. Goodbye.”

It was like an angsty romance movie, he started down the hallway, not letting go of her hands until she had to take a couple steps forward. He waved weakly, and she waved back. She looked so small and sad, the hand mark on her cheek was bright, angry red bruises were already forming along her jaw; he couldn’t leave her. 

But he had to, because if he didn’t, he’d never see her again. Mr. Hyrule would make sure of that, even if Zelda did bust out her collection of abuse.

<>

The first letter came three days later. Sidon had slipped it under his apartment door. It was disguised as a grocery list, but taped to the back was a small white envelope containing Zelda’s letter. 

My Darling,

Firstly, Galli wants me to tell you he misses you and waits humbly for ‘his master’s return’. 

Secondly, it’s been a hell I’ve never known without you at my side during such a turbulent time. I’ve been so gloomy, my ladies don’t know what to do with me! And the substitute they put in for you is even worse than the one from last time! I’ve never met a man so dull. He doesn’t know where I put down my mascara wand or where I hide all my research journals. He doesn’t know any of our jokes and I can’t go to him for comfort when I have a dreadful dream. AND he doesn’t do small talk. I mean, you hardly do either, but at least I know you’re listening. Our time apart is sure to teach me more lessons about how dear you truly are to me, my dearest knight. Your pretty face and electric soul. I can’t wait to see you again. 

You’ll see me on TV today if you flip to channel 6 at noon! Of course I’ll be proclaiming a professional relationship between us that hardly exists, but… knowing you see me will be comforting for me. Father wanted me to take a negative pregnancy test with me to show on air, I almost clawed his eyes out right there. Luckily Impa talked him out of it, told him it was inappropriate and unneeded and nobody would want to see that. She’s so angry with him, you wouldn’t believe it! I’ve never seen her so close to losing her graceful old Sheikah composure.

Don’t write back, okay? I don’t want us to be found out and getting these to you is a challenge enough. I trust that you miss me dearly. I miss you too. I’ll write again soon. Wake up before 4 in the morning if you want to catch Sidon for a chat. If you do, you can tell him anything and he’ll relay it back to me.

XOXOXO,  
Zelda

And then a cherry red lipstick stain. He laughed for the first time in a few days. Zelly didn’t wear lipstick that vibrant, she must have put it on just to kiss the letter. 

He missed her so much. This only confirmed things for him; his adoration for her was so strong that if they ever became anything more than what they already were, he wouldn’t be able to leave her side ever again.

What a scary, yet intriguing, thought that was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THEY ARE IN LOVE


	10. lonely hearts club

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> january to december link and zelda are members

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> phew. this ones rough yall.
> 
> heres some TRIGGER WARNINGS
> 
> panic attacks, violence, severe stress, vomit, blood, hospitals, frequent mentions of abuse
> 
> *update 3.23.20: went back and skimmed the entire story over with grammarly to fix typos, fixed some minor plotholes and inconsistencies, tweaked and added some dialogue and character interactions, and edited some scenes that i considered rushed, unrealistic and cringeworthy writing on my part to be smoother. nothing too major but enough for a quick skim to make sure we're all on the same page.*

Zelda cringed at her own reflection. The makeup artist on set and her ladies had done their best, but the available foundation that matched her still made her look gaunt and sick, and it hardly concealed the bruises along her jaw and cheek, not to mention her slightly black eye. Luckily, Father had only hit her under the collar after Link had scrambled out of the house, probably recognizing they’d have trouble enough hiding the marks he’d already left. so the damage was… minimal, considering the situation.

She dragged her thumb feather-light across her jawline, flinching as the bruises stung. Marionne took her hand and guided it away from her face as she passed by. “You’re rubbing the makeup off, Mistress,” She spoke, quiet but stern, the closest to flat out ordering her to stop she could muster without getting a citation for her manners. 

“Sorry,” Zelda mumbled, clasping her hands behind her back and staring at her shoes. She’d gotten the message from Sidon earlier this morning on the burner phone he’d gifted her; her words to Link had been delivered safely and without much issue. The Zora was a Saint, honestly, agreeing to be the middleman at such an early hour. She hoped Link woke up early enough to catch her on TV-he was a late sleeper on his days off.

Miss Sunny (Hylian host of the ‘Sunny Morning Show’ for the past 15 years) bustled by, but she paused, and when Zelda peeked upwards, she could see the older woman regard her in the mirror’s reflection. Her brows furrowed at the sight of Zelda’s short spaghetti strap white dress and tall, shivering frame stacked on top of heels to make her even taller (was it the cold she was shivering from, or was it fear? Even Zelda wasn’t sure). “I’m hunting down whoever did the wardrobe for you. It’s early winter, for Chrissakes.” She muttered, removing her blue shawl and draping it over Zelda’s shoulders. 

The heiress smiled weakly. “Thank you.”

Sunny grunted, waved her off, and went on her way. Zelda glanced at her phone. 45 minutes until showtime. First, she’d sit down with Sunny, ‘explain herself’ through the prodding questions the hostess asked (the older woman promised she’d be gentle) over coffee in the famous ‘Sunny Morning Show’ mug. She’d play a few mini-games to go along with the show’s happy-go-lucky image, and then it was over. She’d be done with it, at least for now. 

She began messing with her engagement ring in earnest. 

<>

She was spread thin but glamorous, as always. Sunny rattled off a joke as Zelda sat and she laughed with her chest, flashing a dazzling smile, eyes squinting up and all, flipping her hair over her shoulder as she settled in her seat. 

Link knew immediately it was all fake. Plus, the poorly concealed bruises along her jaw caught the light in all the most incriminating ways. 

Glancing down at the live Twitter feed, he wasn’t the only one who noticed.

‘Those BRUISES. Holy shit.’

‘who did that to her???????’

‘They look like fingerprints

‘mua needs to be fired right tf now’ 

“Hi!” Sunny greeted cheerily. Zelda returned the sentiment with double the enthusiasm in her sweetest talk show voice, raising her hand (deliberately the one with the ring on it) to brush a lock of hair from her face. 

Sunny leaned in, eyes glinting for a story, but overall friendly. “Tell me. Where’s your friend and where’s your love?”

Zelda hummed politely. “Sergeant Greene has been suspended with pay for a month for the trouble we both caused a few days ago, so he’s at home in his apartment waiting it out. My dear Aldrich is in England overseeing the preparation of our venue.”

“You’re in contact with the Sergeant. What’s he think of all this?”

“He-” Zelda hesitated briefly, but it was long enough to be visible on her face. “...He’s understandably upset. He’s introverted and shy, so he’s not a fan of the misplaced attention. He’s not… from the same… how you say, class of people as Alrich and I. The need to have this conversation doesn’t make much sense to him. He thinks this is all stupid.” 

Sunny nodded. “What does Sir Aldrich think?”

Zelda’s face smoothed out into something emotionless and cool. “We’re loyal to each other and he’s not the jealous type. He’s not overly concerned with my outings with friends, regardless of how third parties try to spin them. We’ve spoken about this scandal, and he’s left it to me to handle, as we’ve come to consider it minor.”

Sunny made an understanding noise. “I personally think this has been blown out of proportion and it’s been handled poorly. You just turned eighteen a few months ago, and you’re a young woman with young friends,” She took a drawn out sip from her coffee mug. “The Sergeant, being such a high ranking military officer, is similar to you in a lot of ways, I think. Neither of you truly got to be kids. There’s a lot pressing down on your shoulders. Would you agree that that may be a reason for your closeness?”

Link would certainly agree. 

“I think it could certainly be interpreted that way. Link-Sergeant Greene, excuse me-is much more mature than me. He’s quite serious on the surface, with no room for games or joking around. And being raised in such a privileged state, I can be tone deaf and rash. Sometimes, it makes our age gap feel like four decades instead of four years. We get annoyed with each other often, there’s a lot of petty arguing. But he’s so patient with me that we just had our first big blowout fight last week, before-you know.” She grabbed for her own mug, fingers trembling around it.

Sunny reached over to pat her knee. “It’s alright. You don’t have to talk about it, here or anywhere. But I imagine going through such an event only brought you closer together?” 

“Yes. Yes. I owe his team my life and the lives of my family and friends.” 

Flashing on the giant screen behind the two women was pictures of him and Zelda together, taken straight from her Instagram and Snapchat. A clip from her story last week of him and Paya wearing different things in Zelda’s room as hats. Paya spilled a bottle of liquid foundation all over her shirt (trying to get the cap off to wear as a hat), and his own wordless bark of laughter rang out, sharp and clear through the speakers in his living room. 

The studio audience buzzed with amusement. Zelda smiled softly up at the not-so-faraway memory. Up at pictures of them together.

“He doesn’t seem gruff or serious at all.” Sunny remarked.

“Most of his professional personality is just for professional situations. He’s actually just a big old goof. He’s a wildman. He may not be able to speak to a lot of people, but he loves to laugh with them. He’s very loud when he’s happy or amused. I hear him laugh more than I hear him talk. He’s a great leader, people around the estate adore him and vye for just seconds of his attention. He loves kids, and he loves the outdoors. He’s a good listener, lots of people come to him with their problems. No one can beat him at any card game unless they get lucky or he lets them. Goddess, I’m rambling because I miss him,” She giggled lightly, pressing a finger against her lips to tell herself to shut up. “I couldn’t ask for a better head of security or companion.” 

The live Twitter feed was not ruling in Aldrich’s favor. Mr. Hyrule would not be pleased.

‘This girl is in love but not with her fiancé.’

‘does she know its ok to say she just wants to have sex with someone born in the same generation’

‘the dukes gonna need viagra DAILY to keep up with the young hot and spritely dude whos hanging out with his stunning and vibrant wife literally constantly’

‘Not a single informal picture of Zelda with her fiancé, but she posts pictures of her with her guard’s arm around her waist on Instagram weekly. We ALL know what’s going on around these parts.’ 

‘sjtjkdkektksktkgken i HOPE shes pregnant with that other dudes child. maybe then she can run away and actually be happy or something.’

‘If she actually has babies with the duke I will cry forever. He looks like an egg in the throes of a midlife crisis next to that girl. He’ll cancel out anything his beautiful wife gives. Their offspring will be cursed’

‘#FreeZelda go to him BITCH’

‘#FreeZelda fuck ur dad’

‘#FreeZelda’

‘#FreeZelda’

‘#FreeZelda’

‘#FreeZelda’

Link blinked down at the flurry of hashtags. If Mr. Hyrule was looking for a PR disaster, he had one.

<>

“Now for the question everyone’s been asking.”

Zelda swallowed, schooling her features into something calm, but her hands shook so hard it vibrated up her arms. Under the table between them, Sunny rubbed her calf with the tip of her shoe, a subtle way to try and comfort her. Was her fear that obvious? She had to get it together.

“Off duty paparazzi spotted you at a furniture store with your guard, looking at baby supplies and walking quite closely with him,” The hostess leaned it, and it felt like the entire room held their breath. “Are you expecting?”

Zelda exhaled. “N-No. No. I’m not pregnant. Not with my fiancé’s child or anyone else who has been suspected. I’m practically a child myself, I can’t care for one yet.” 

Her weak joke fell flat as the audience murmured. Public opinion clearly stated she wasn’t to be believed. 

Sunny sat back in her chair, glancing minutely at the disturbed audience. “I believe you.”

Zelda blinked, face red. “Hm?”

The older woman shrugged. “I believe you. If a woman says she’s not pregnant, I think we should all accept that and move on. It’s not my business. It’s not their business-” She gestured at the audience. “-It’s not the papers’ business, it’s just yours.”

Zelda shuddered. That wasn’t what she was expecting. “I want everyone to know that I do want a family. I’m excited to be a mom and I love-I love my fiancé. But the next generation of Hyrules isn’t here yet, and it may not be for a very long time. My mother struggled to conceive. There were many failures, miscarriages, and ectopic pregnancies before me and after me. My mother was perfect in so many ways, but her body failed her in a way that broke her heart and wore her down and made her sick. It would not be a shock to myself or my family if mine took the same path.”

Her hands stopped shaking and her back straightened. Her mum was here with her, she could almost feel the hand stroking her hair. “It has been painful for me to be accused of concealing a baby that doesn’t exist, and may never be able to exist. To be informed by the entire country that they believe me to be so stupid, so unfaithful, that I’d go shopping for an illegitimate child, publicly, in broad daylight. I’m insulted. I’m beyond upset. I hope that in nine months, when there is no newborn to be spoken of but I still remain, the Sergeant at my side, that you think of me first.” 

Angry. She was too angry. She couldn’t be a spitfire on live television, she wouldn’t be seen as credible. She needed to get a grip. The audience was dead silent, she’d been speaking to the camera instead of to Sunny. She inhaled shakily, all the fight suddenly drained out of her. Mum was gone. “I am begging you, next time, think critically instead of looking for your next bit of gossip.”

Sunny stared at her, eyes shining with sadness and sympathy. Zelda couldn’t stand it. “I… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have gotten upset. I’m sorry-”

The hostess turned towards the camera crew as Zelda continued to spiral into panic. “Cut to commercial.” She stood quickly, reaching for Zelda.

Hit her.

Sunny was going to hit her for acting out, for not doing what she said, not giving her the answer she wanted.

She was gonna hit her.

Worse, maybe.

Kill her. For embarrassing her and her show on live television by getting so mad.

Did she have a gun? What if she had a gun. There were witnesses, she wouldn’t shoot. Would she? The Yiga did. They tried to kill her. They tried to kill her family. Where was her family? Where was Link?

Gone. Dead probably. If she was in danger if she was alone and afraid and he wasn’t there he wasn’t alive. Because if he was she wouldn’t be here in danger alone and afraid.

At the touch of Sunny’s fingers on her arm, she flinched back so violently she fell out of her chair, moving to cover her face. The audience gasped, and Sunny cursed, yelling at the crew to ‘cut the damn camera’.

Blood on her face. Again. No, that wasn’t blood, that was tears. She was crying. No, there was blood too. Blood sweat and tears. She cracked her nose on the floor and now it was bleeding. 

Bleeding? Link had bled once. All over her. Link was bleeding. Right now. Dying. She must be dying because he was dying once. Was he dying right now? He had to be, because she was hurt and alone and afraid and he wasn’t here. Where was Link? Where was her family?

“Zelda dear. Can you look up for me?” Someone called softly. It was Sunny, on her knees a foot away from her curled frame. She shouldn’t be kneeling, Zelda thought; she was in her 40’s and her joints must ache.

A man was yelling at the audience to put their phones away, quit recording. It was prohibited and there was an emergency.

She peered up at Sunny, brows furrowed at all the noise. She was dying, couldn’t they be quiet and respectful? Mourn maybe? She was dying. It was rude to take pictures of corpses without their permission.

“Good. Good girl,” Sunny crooned. She lifted her hands, palms up. “Nothing in my hands. I won’t hurt you. You’re safe with me. Can I touch your shoulder?” She spoke slowly and clearly, but Zelda still felt like she was having a stroke. A stroke that was causing her to die. Because she was dying. We live we die we steal we kill we lie.

“I’m dying.” She blubbered plainly to the woman. How she took the shocking news would determine if she was to be trusted. 

Sunny shook her head, reaching over slowly until her palm rested on Zelda’s shoulder. It was warm and soft. Unlike the floor. The floor was hard and cold, like she’d be when she died and rigor mortis set in. She hoped to be buried next to mum, and Link when he came to join her. Father could get fucked, though. She hoped his grave got robbed so ghost her and ghost Link could laugh about it. Where was Link? “You’re not dying. You’ve just had a fall and bumped your nose.”

Zelda stared at her blankly, trying to make sense of her words as she tried not to scream at the sensation of someone touching her. “Zelda. Name for me one thing you can feel.”

“Your hand.” Zelda deadpanned, tears still streaming down her blank face.

“Good. Something you can see?”

“You.”

“Mhm. What can you hear?”

“People yelling. You again.”

“Yes. What can you taste?”

“There’s blood in my mouth. Get it out. Get it out get it out.”

Sunny extended a hand behind her, and someone faceless put a water bottle in it. Did she have the power to summon water bottles? What the fuck? What a lame superpower. “Swish and spit, dear. On the floor. I don’t care.”

Sunny cupped her chin softly and helped her drink. But as soon as the water hit her tongue, she sat straight up and vomited half digested brunch all over her white dress and Sunny’s shawl. “Sorry, sorry. So sorry I’m sorry,” She croaked frantically, but the hostess just shushed her and tied her hair back in an ugly half bun.

“I don’t think we’re gonna be able to calm her down. Call an ambulance,” A voice she recognized as the producer’s said sharply. 

“No!” Zelda shrieked. The room paused. “No ambulance.” They’d find the abuse. They’d know the truth. They couldn’t. Not yet she wasn’t ready.

“Okay, okay. No ambulance.” Sunny assured her quickly as Gisele and Marionne rushed to her side. Gisele cupped her cheek and she dropped her head to the other woman’s chest. Her lady stroked her hair even as leftover chin vomit smeared all over her only set of work clothes. 

Gisele’s hand was too small to be Link’s, but she pretended it was him anyways. “Hey, princess,” He’d whisper, because he hardly spoke above a murmur, even to her, his trusted princess. “It’s lookin’ rough, but you’re okay. I promise. You trust me?”

Of course I trust you, she’d reply. If stick-up-his-ass Link said everything was okay, then everything was okay. Period. 

<>

Something was wrong.

Link had turned off the TV during a commercial break after Zelda had fake gushed about her fiancé, something ugly curling in his chest. 

He put the beer opener and Bud Lite down slowly, ears twitching.

Something was wrong. He could feel it. 

His phone buzzed. It was Beedle.

Beedle: holy fuck my man holy fuck

Beedle: zelda panicked and collapsed on live tv

Beedle: people are tweeting videos they took after they cut to commercial

Beedle: dude she is freaking the fuck out

Me: fuck off. ur fucking with me.

Beedle: no. go look

He opened Twitter and tapped over to ‘#FreeZelda’, which had been trending for twenty minutes already. The first and most popular video was a recording of someone’s TV. They rewinded. Zelda looked panicked and weak. Miss Sunny looked sharply to the camera, barking for a commercial break before rising towards Zelda, hand poised to touch her arm.

Something feral in Zelda’s eyes flashed, and she threw herself to the floor. Link squeezed his eyes shut at the audible crack her face made when it hit wood. Zelda was tall, made taller by her heels, so it was a long way down. 

She’d popped herself in the face with the floor to avoid being touched. The caption to the video came to the correct conclusion.

‘This woman is being abused.’

Shaky video after shaky video as he scrolled. His stomach lurched as he watched her throw up on herself from three different angles.

Beedle: isnt the building they film that show in like 10 blocks from ur apartment

Me: yes.

Beedle: dude. go.

Me: i cant

Me: her dad

Beedle: tbh who gives a flying fuck about stinky bastard hyrule

Me: i do

Beedle: no the fuck you do not.

Beedle: link.

Beedle: go

He took the subway instead of his truck. Faster, hopefully. Maybe. He wasn’t sure. 

He didn’t care if he wasn’t allowed to speak to her or get anywhere near her. He just wanted to see her. 

He walked quickly down the street, the skyscraper just in sight. There was an ambulance outside, blinding lights flashing. There were already dozens crowded around. Police too.

They rolled someone out on a stretcher. He’d recognize that shock of tangled golden hair anywhere. He got maybe 20 feet from the ambulance before climbing up onto a trash can. 

He would probably only be able to shout once, and it would probably sound nothing like him.

“Zel!” He yelled, and his voice cracked right down the middle. Dozens of heads turned towards him.

She moved her head, groggy from whatever they were pumping through the mask on her face. She looked confused, eyes searching blindly. She didn’t recognize him Jesus she didn’t know he was there. 

And as soon as she appeared she was gone, ambulance doors snapping shut and thundering down the road.

The crowd dispersed quickly, many openly staring at the dude in the red sweatshirt and ratty sweatpants standing on top of a trash can who’d just yelled as loud as he could with no payout.

He’d let them think he was homeless or something.

Beedle texted him on the ride back.

Beedle: well?

Me: i went.

Me: i called out to her. she heard it but i think it just stressed her out. she 100% didnt know i was actually there if she even recognized my voice at all.

Beedle: oh link

Me: its nothing

Beedle: its not nothing

Beedle: you fucking soldiers and acting like trauma and heartbreaking situations arent a big deal

Beedle: you literally dont fucking talk and you just went out and yelled in front of a bunch of people to get the attention of the person youve been forcefully separated from and she didn’t recognize you

Beedle: thats. not. nothing

Me: it IS it was a stupid fucking idea okay

Beedle: one of these days i am going to crack your skull open with a tennis racket to check and make sure you actually have a fucking brain in there

Me: go carve a diamond or some shit jesus

Link threw his phone across the room and screamed until he couldn’t talk even if he wanted to.

<>

Zelda woke up slowly, taking thirty seconds to realize the two red blobs at her bedside were Sidon and Mipha. 

“Hey, pretty girl,” Sidon cooed softly. Mipha brushed hair out of her face. “There’s those big emerald eyes I’ve been looking for.”

Zelda tilted her head, trying to signal she understood them.

“You just missed Urbosa and Impa,” Mipha spoke softly, sweetly, and Zelda could tell by the pitch of her voice she’d been singing recently. A Zora's song was a welcome sound in hospitals-it was said to bring health and good tidings.

Wait.

Hospital. She was in a hospital.

“What-” She croaked, trying to sit up, but Sidon put a hand to her chest. 

“Bedrest. You’re on bedrest.” He said gently.

“Sidon. What happened to me?” She grabbed his arm, staring up at him.

Sidon sighed. “You had a PTSD and stress related panic attack on live television and freaked out so bad you threw up all over yourself and they had to knock you out. You’ve been unconscious for like a day now.”

She burst into tears.

Mipha hit him. “You’re so blunt, my God.”

“I’m sorry! Zelly, hey, shh, it’s alright, I’m sorry-” He stroked her cheek, but the tears just wouldn’t stop.

“My life is a living hell,” She sobbed, snatching the tissues Mipha offered her and blowing her nose. 

“Let’s just all sit here and calm down for a moment,” Mipha declared over Zelda’s wailing.

They sat in silence until Zelda’s cries dwindled to sniffles. 

“What now? God, what now?” Zelda muttered, crossing her arms.

“Well,” Mipha said gently. “If you really want to know, you’re going to be evaluated and put on anxiety medication. Your attack was so severe that they considered a psych ward for a few days, but we’re past that now. Everyone in your life knows that would freak you out more. We told them that and after some thought they agreed.”

Sidon rubbed her arm. His skin was damp and cool. “You’re going to therapy three times a week now instead of just once. Monday, Tuesday, and Friday.”

Zelda nodded slowly. “Okay.”

“As for your next steps as a public figure, your father’s right hand men have suggested either a press conference or going into hiding for a number of weeks.”

She shook her head vigorously. “No way am I just going to-to hide from all this. Where’s Father? I need to speak with him immediately, I want a press conference scheduled yesterday-” She tried to stand up, but both Zora siblings blocked her.

“Bedrest, Zelda,” Mipha said gently. “Your father isn’t here right now.”

She sniffed. “Well, can someone call him? The longer I look like a damsel to the public the lamer I feel.”

“You don’t look like a damsel,” Sidon said shortly. “You look like someone who is sick and needs to rest. I won’t let you turn on your workaholic mode right now.”

“Workaholic-” Zelda spluttered.

“Yes! Zelda,” Sidon dragged a hand down his face. “You're spread so thin that it landed you in the hospital. You need to just calm the fuck down for like five combined minutes at least. Please.”

She looked her friend right in the eye and ripped out her IV.

Sidon just pressed the call nurse button. “You’re so fucking dramatic.”

<>

Zelda got the chewing out of a lifetime from the on-call nurse as he tried to find a new vein. 

After he left, threatening to put her on antipsychotics if she did it again, she and Sidon sat in choked silence. Mipha had gone to get everyone dinner. 

She stared out the window at the bustling city below. Sidon cleared his throat.

“Zelly.”

“What.” She snapped.

“You know I love you. I’d do anything for you. Ever since I was 102 years old and you were barely a day on this earth, I’ve sworn to protect you. I promised your mum on her deathbed that I’d never betray your trust, Zelda.”

She grunted, still staring out the window.

“But I am terrified for your future, dear. Things are so terribly wrong and the one man who can keep you from going batshit off the rails long term is a mistake away from never seeing you again. I have lied for you many many times.”

She heard him lean closer, and turned to meet his golden eyes. “But if they ask us if we know of anyone who may be hurting you, if they ask us if we know where those bruises came from, if they ask us if we know of any abuse or unseen trauma. I will not lie.”

“Tell them whatever you want. I’ll deny it.” She whispered fiercely.

His eyes softened. “I know where your evidence collection is, Zelda. For the rest of my hundreds of years, I will never understand why you protect that man, over and over and over again.”

“I’m saving it as blackmail,” She snapped. He tilted his head.

“Are you? Or are you saving it until he’s dead and you can throw it away and pretend you were not abused for decades, telling us that the perfect time just never came, because you felt forced by your ladies to document your torment?”

“Get out.” Her voice shook.

“I love you, Zelda.”

“Get. Out.”

He obeyed, but stopped in the doorframe. “I’m not leaving until tonight. If you want to write anything, I’ll take it.”

“Go!” She shrieked, and he shut the door quietly behind him.

<>

‘My Darling,

Come see me.

X,  
Zelda.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #FreeZelda
> 
> my school closed down until May like we're not going back to school yahoo
> 
> so expect frequent updates and edits from me, like this chapter 3 days after the last one when it usually takes like. a month.


	11. primadonna girl

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ugh, so sorry this chapter took 2 weeks to get out when i promised a quick update. i got the new animal crossing and have become OBSESSED with my hero academia. i enjoy writing this story a lot but because the world is so absolute shit right now ive been focusing on the things i find the MOST joy in. ill continue to update throughout whatever the hell this is, but no dates are set in stone. they never have been lol i do what i want
> 
> xoxo mag

Beedle: AJSNGNSKRKGNWMTOOSKFKDKKRKT

Me: what r u gay now or something

Beedle: NO THIS FUCKING GOSSIP COLUMN TRIED TO ROAST YOU BY SAYING ‘HE LOOKS LIKE HES CONSTANTLY HAVING VIETNAM FLASHBACKS WHEN PEOPLE TALK TO HIM’

Me: it was iraq you bitch

Beedle: YOU SHOULD EMAIL THEM THAJTJTJJSKTKKDKT

Me: lol

Me: why are you looking at gossip columns about me

Beedle: bc ur my bff 5ever duh

Me: best friend forever five ever

Beedle: period !

Link smiled down at Beedle’s continued string of texts about how he had gotten high and eaten a gallon bag of jellybeans in under four hours when his phone pinged with a text from an unknown number.

Unknown: hello cishet<3

Me: sidon

Unknown: ;))))))

Sidon: so. bae.

Me: yeh

Sidon: zelda wants to see you.

Me: no.

Sidon: :(((((( LINK

Me: No.

Me: id do anything for her that does not include risking both of our heads

Me: i told you this when you dropped off her note last week

Sidon: but its LOVE you cunt

Me: ur so british

Sidon: besides the point

Sidon: the point. is love

Me: its 2 more weeks. literally 2 weeks. we’ll live

Me: and its not love

Me: we’re friends

Sidon: whats that smell……..

Sidon: oh god its awful…………….

Me: Jesus

Sidon: oh! i know!

Sidon: ITS

Me: bullshit.

Sidon: BULLSHIT

Me: okay so we’re in… like. so what? we can be apart for 2 weeks

Me: im not going to let you guys rope me into losing my job

Sidon: link

Sidon: my bro. my baby

Sidon: honey. sweetcakes

Me: what

Sidon: zelly is. so mad at me.

Sidon: bc i refused to lie for her

Sidon: never even got to be like ‘ACTUALLY I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE THOSE BRUISES CAME FROM. LET ME TELL YOU’

Sidon: but shes PISSED.

Sidon: and mentally unstable

Sidon: this bitch is fucking crazy rn okay

Sidon: and shes so upset bc i told her you didnt want to see her

Me: you bastard

Me: its not that i dont WANT to see her

Me: its that i CANT

Sidon: you WONT

Sidon: look please do this for both of us. i want to surprise her with you so she’ll stop hating us

Me: she doesnt hate us

Sidon: OH HO HO

Sidon: YOU HAVE NOT BEEN AROUND THIS HOE IN HER FINAL FORM

Sidon: her new meds and current situation have her hormones out of whack and her temper is SHORT

Sidon: shes out for blood guts and chocolate cake link.

Sidon: shes murderous 23 hours out of the day

Sidon: a 5’8 ball of ptsd and anger

Sidon: moms spaghetti

Me: so what? you want me to go get punched in the face?

Sidon: girl she’d never do that. shes obsessed with you

Me: ok jesus

Me: so lets say

Me: hypothetically

Me: i agree to see zelda.

Me: whats ur plan.

A thirty second window. That’s all Sidon could safely afford them. There was a café at the halfway point between the Hyrule estate and Link’s apartment in Hell’s Kitchen. Sidon and Mipha would invite Zelda for coffee. While they were sat down, Link had half a minute to say whatever he needed to say, and then he had to get the hell out of dodge. 

Zelda wouldn’t have any idea of the plan until after it had been executed and Link had fucked off. 

“It’s not foolproof, but,” Sidon said over the phone. “If we execute it well enough, Stinky Bastard Hyrule won’t have any idea. And I trust in your ability to pull things off.”

Link hesitated. ‘Yes’ was on the tip of his tongue. He wanted to see her so badly. It was such a bad idea, such a mix of cheesy romance and teenage angst he should be grown out of. “I’ll think about it.” He whispered down the receiver, then hung up without saying goodbye. 

He wouldn’t. He wouldn’t think about it. This was preposterous, he adored Zelda but he wasn’t risking never seeing her again for thirty seconds of what would end up being meaningless rambling from his end, if he could get words out at all in her ethereal presence for the first time in 336 hours. 

Me: tell her 14 days. just 14.

Sidon: link.

Sidon: shes falling apart

Me: tell her 14 days. halfway there.

<>

“You should do what most girls having mental breakdowns do. Cut all your hair off.” Iti had meant it as a joke, but Zelda went to the salon that fucking day and got her hair cropped to her shoulders. Nearly two feet of hair, a decade of growing, gone in 45 minutes. 

She sort of loved it. It was so light and easy to manage, and Mira had helped her dye silly blue streaks in it that only lasted a week but made her feel a new sort of freedom she would hardly be able to stand to part with ever again. 

(Plus, Father couldn’t yank her hair to discipline her anymore. Or stop her when she tried to run.)

‘#FreeZelda’ had trended, Father had thrown a baby tantrum and was refusing to speak to her, and God damn it she was going to reclaim her body, bit by bruised bit. 

She was having a mental breakdown but she was doing it in style.

She hoped Link would like it, but at the same time she wouldn’t care if he didn’t. 

She, Cassy, Iti, Bella and Mira were playing a drinking game when Sidon waltzed in, greeting her ladies cheerily. They giggled ‘hi Sidon!’s back, cheeks bright red.

Zelda stared resolutely at the floor.

Sidon’s fins suddenly engulfed her, ruby scales invading her line of sight from every possible angle. She shoved him off as gently as she could muster. Sidon sighed, but bared his teeth at her ladies in a blinding grin. “A drinking game? Pour me in, then!”

Bella eagerly poured him a cup of wine, Sidon sat across from her, grabbing a pillow to cuddle with, and they settled back to continue their show. It was some medical drama, a ‘Grey’s Anatomy’ knockoff that Iti had become obsessed with during her stay in the hospital (ironically, Iti claimed. Zelda doubted that). Zelda wasn’t really paying attention to it at all, only taking swigs from her cup every time she heard the other girls squeal for everyone to ‘take a shot’! Cassy snuggled into her shoulder, sighing contentedly. She paused for a moment before grabbing her Mistress’s hand and squeezing. 

“Are you alright?”

Zelda squeezed back before knocking the rest of her drink and reaching to pour some more. Cassy stared at her as she started chugging that one too. “You’re an alcoholic.”

“We’re American. There’s nothing more patriotic than getting blackout drunk on a Tuesday,” Zelda mumbled, swirling the ruby red wine around the equally red cup. 

Mira giggled, dragging her hands down her pink face. “I always forget you’re actually a New Yorker. That Cockney accent throws me the hell off.”

“Suits her though, doesn’t it?” Sidon quipped, raising his eyebrows at her over the rim of his glass. 

“Goddess, imagine this bitch with a New York accent. I fucking can’t.” Bella snorted.

“Zelda from Jersey!” Iti shrieked, then exploded into incomprehensible gibberish-laughter.

“Pipe down you lot! Are you having a bubble?” Sidon squeaked in a high-pitched voice, trading his standard English accent for a mockery of hers. 

Sidon suddenly slammed his hands down on the couch. Zelda flinched. “Have you heard the Sargeant’s accent?”

Zelda’s heart skipped and then squeezed at the mention of her darling.

“He’s from Manhattan, isn’t he? Hell’s Kitchen? Moved here from the South? I’ve never heard him talk. Seen him talk, but never heard him. He gets so close to people and he’s so quiet,” Bella mused.

“He talks so. God. Damn. Fast,” Sidon clapped to enunciate each word. “I was on the phone with him earlier today and I had to turn off the fan in my room to hear him because he was so quiet and so fast-”

Zelda’s head whipped up as her drunk mind finally processed Sidon’s words. “You talked to him today?”

The Zora hesitated. “Well, yeah. He’s my friend too, and I was trying to get him to-you know.”

“And?” She tilted her head expectantly.

“He still doesn’t want to risk it.”

She slumped back into the couch, pouting. Of course that hard-headed bitch wouldn’t change his mind. She was kind of a dolt for hoping he would. He was so dutiful and responsible. Asshole.

She and Sidon stared at each other for a moment. Zelda wanted to apologize, she really wanted to.

“Oh, take a shot!” Iti called, being the only one still paying attention to the show. Sidon looked away to laugh and make a joke.

Once again, Zelda chugged.

<>

Link was Twitter’s latest MCM, and Beedle was fucking thrilled about it.

For once, Link regretted letting Zelda plaster his face all over her accounts, not to mention tagging him.

18,000 Instagram followers to 200,000 in less than 24 hours. The attention made him cringe.

Beedle: oh my god

Beedle: Oh my God PLEASE

Beedle: these bitches giving me the best ideas

Beedle: shirtless pic! shirtless pic! shirtless pic!

Me: absolutely fucking not

Beedle: its what the stans WANT

Beedle: ur like that girl on tiktok who got like 500k on twitter and then revealed she had a boyfriend and lost almost all of them

Beedle: please nail zelda so the cycle can be complete

Me: :/

Beedle: whats wrong son

Beedle: i know ur Honry

Him being horny for Zelda was decidedly the wrong way to put it. It was too… ‘fuckboy one night stand’ for the way he felt about her. It wasn’t love yet, no. They’d only known each other for around four months, after all. Enough for an insatiable crush to blossom, but love was fickle, especially with him, it seemed. 

He’d had a lot of sex, some one night stands when he came home from overseas, where the girls made him coffee and wrote their number on a napkin and always left before eight lest he kick them out, some experimental fooling around with his soldier mates that was only a little homo and sworn to secrecy once the sun rose. But he’d never really loved someone before, at least not in the way he was sure he could love Zel, given time. 

But that was the thing, wasn’t it? They didn’t have time. She was engaged and would be married in three months. Sir Aldrich had hinted that he didn’t care if Zelda cheated, as he was just looking for companionship, but Link just wasn’t comfortable with that. Selfish as it was, he wanted her all to himself. He didn’t want to be a side piece. He wanted her in all the ways she’d offer. And of course he wanted her naked, sweaty, mewling, satisfied, flushed, beautiful, of course he imagined it when he laid awake at night, mind so full of thoughts of her that he couldn’t do anything but think (far more than he’d ever admit), but on the list of ways he wanted her, that was pretty far down, all things considered.

Goddess, she was perfectly imperfect. Everything he’d ever wanted in someone and everything that pissed him off, all rolled into one gorgeous visage, with a gap between her two front teeth and soft hands and posh accent and a melodious giggle that often ended in a snort and huge emerald green eyes that bore into him and picked his thoughts apart whenever she wanted something she knew he’d hesitate to give. The stone cold, studious blood-born matriarch that shone through her immature personality once in a blue moon and sent shivers up his spine. 

Heiress Zelda Hyrule was everything Sargeant Link Greene had ever wanted.

And yet it wasn’t love yet.

There was a soft knock at his door, then the jingle of keys. The landlord coming to snoop around, Link assumed, swiveling around on his couch to greet the man.

Everything he had ever wanted was standing in his kitchen, in black leggings and a Lakers sweatshirt he realized at that exact moment he’d left in his room at the Estate drooping past her knuckles.

<>

They stared at each other for a full thirty seconds before Link spoke. “What the fuck,”

Was all he said.

“Hi.” She responded softly.

“What the fuck!” He said, louder this time, springing over the back of his couch. He was going to tell her to get out right this instant, but she opened her arms for a hug and he melted into them without a second thought.

He picked her up and spun her around slowly, inhaling the scent of her hair. She’d been hanging around her friends all day-she smelled like Sidon’s cigarettes and her ladies’ favorite brand of alcohol, mixed with the musk of his sweatshirt. ‘Why do you have my sweatshirt?’ was the first thing he said to her in over 336 hours.

“I’m really drunk.” Was all she mumbled into his neck. He was still holding her a foot off the ground with her arms around his shoulders (offering little to no assistance in supporting the 135 extra pounds hanging off of his front), her yellow crocs dangling limply. 

She swung her legs around his hips, trying several times to anchor her thighs around his waist. He chuckled when she finally succeeded. “I can see that. Was coming here a Zelda decision or a Drunk Zelda decision? A Drelda decision?”

She grunted wordlessly.

“I see,” He nodded seriously, carrying her over to his couch and dumping her onto it. “Let’s get some water in ya.”

He offered her the glass and she refused it, still wordless. “What, are you roleplaying as me? C’mon, baby.” He meant it as an insult to her maturity, but she clearly took it a different way, attitude softening enough that she accepted the glass of water, eyes warm as she regarded him.

“I missed you,” She finally said. “God, I’m not that fucking drunk. Like, I’m drunk enough to be here, presently taking up space in your apartment, but I’m only, like, tipsy, dude. You can’t break me with a couple cups of wine.” She slid down onto the floor.

“I missed you too,” He replied, sitting down on the side of the couch she wasn’t slowly sliding off of. “I love what you’ve done with your hair, princess.” He tugged lightly on a strand of faded blue hair to punctuate.

“Thanks. Like I wouldn’t give a fuck if you didn’t but it feels good to know you do. I’m thinking a full head of fire engine red hair next time.”

He stroked her cheek teasingly. “Is my Zelda going through a late bloomer emo phase?”

She pouted mockingly back up at him. “Your Zelda had a mental breakdown in front of the entire world and this is how she is dealing.”

“How are you, by the way? You scared the shit out of me.” 

She blinked slowly up at him, like a contented cat. He could practically hear her purr. “Perfect, now that I’m with you.” 

Jesus he was blushing. She grinned wickedly up at him before crawling back up onto the couch. She rested her head on his shoulder, and he rubbed circles into her back. He hesitated, and it was silent for a minute before he finally spoke.

“Zel… I really think you should go.”

She sat bolt upright so fast he had to lean backwards to avoid the top of her head cracking into his chin. She looked positively insulted, and… absolutely furious. Just like Sidon said she would be. “I guess bluntness was always your specialty,” She scoffed, standing abruptly. “If you want me gone, just ask, right?” 

He sighed, grabbing for her wrist as she started frumping away. “Zelda-”

“No, no. I get it, Sidon did say you didn’t want to see me-”

“That’s not at all what I meant when I told Sidon that and you know it.”

She was teary eyed as she swiveled on him, yanking her wrist out of his grip. She was going to cry and Link was going to collapse. “You got two chances to see me and you denied them both. What am I supposed to think of that? It certainly doesn’t make you out as someone eager to see me again.”

He looked at her like she was stupid. She kind of was. “Did you not catch the part where I’d get fired if we made contact, contact we’re making right now, for a month? I’m trying to protect us, like every other fucking day I’m with you, I’m trying to protect us and you’re freaking the fuck out on me about it. It’s my job. I’m literally trying to do my job.” 

She scrubbed at her face, distressed as ever. “No, I know, I know, but-I just-I don’t fucking know.” She promptly laid on the floor, head still buried in her hands. He sat beside her. 

“My floor’s really dirty.” He mumbled, and she reached out blindly to smack at him. 

“Shut up. I’m thinking.”

“I didn’t know you could think.”

“I swear to Hylia I will kill you.”

After ten minutes, she sat upright at last. “I’ll leave if you want me to.”

Link huffed. “That’s the thing. I don’t.” 

She smacked at him again. “You just fucking said-”

“I know what I said. But just because I think you should go doesn’t mean I want you to. It’d be the wise grown up thing for both of us to do, but that doesn’t mean it’s what I want to happen.”

She scoffed. “We’re not grown ups. Legally? Yeah. Emotionally?” She tapped at her own chest, right above her heart. “Baby.”

He nodded. “You are definitely baby.”

She giggled, leaning into his space to press her forehead to his, sighing contentedly. Her breath smelled like expensive red wine and gourmet chocolate. “Missed you.”

“Missed you too.”

“You better have,” Zelda patted his cheek fondly. He wanted to kiss her until she could never be sad again-so he leaned in and planted a smacking kiss on her cheek. She nuzzled his face in reply. They were like two 13 year olds in the throes of puppy love. Link had never felt like this before, and it thrilled him.

<>

Link ordered a pizza and they sat on the couch, chatting idly, but thoughts of what Father would do plagued Zelda during what should have been a joyous reunion. She was drunk and she wanted to go somewhere, and now she was in the one place she was forbidden to be-nothing they could do about it now-but she feared Father would make good on his promise. 

Link was a valuable asset, adored and respected, as either a superior or an equal, by most. All the children who were being raised on the Estate looked at him with admiration sparkling in their doe eyes. His word, like that of hers and Father’s, was regarded as law. Detractors were compromised with or swiftly corrected. Her guard would be beyond upset with yet another change after so many months with Link at the helm. 

To lose him would be a huge blow to the family’s innerworkings; it’d throw everything out of orbit for days, maybe even weeks. A sense of betrayal and loss of loyalty was possible, maybe even expected, when Link was so revered. ‘If the Sergeant was such a hard worker and trusted head of guard and he still got the boot, what must they think of me? Am I even worth half as much to them as I’ve been led to believe?’, they would think. But were his strength and influence among Hyrule family politics enough for Father to be persuaded to keep him around? Their relationship was commonly regarded as a scandalous budding romance in the employee’s inner circles-Iti had told her so. Did Father see it as such?

She really didn’t know.

Zelda shook herself vigorously out of her tunnel vision into the worst case scenario. She shouldn’t be thinking so negatively. That was Father’s job.

As it turned out, Link hadn’t yet been filled in on the discoveries the private investigation into the Yiga Clan had uncovered. Zelda was vaguely shocked at the notion-Father had completely shut him out. 

“It was an attempt on my life. I was the main target, but you and Aldrich were also not to be left alive if it could be helped,” She swallowed as he stared at her, expression unreadable and normally window-to-the-soul eyes walled off and distant. “They were a Sheikah man and woman named Taeil and Blanche, who joined the Yiga because they disagreed with their counterparts who work for or are closely associated with my family, notably Impa and Paya. Their idea was that if I was gone, there’d be no heir, people would panic, and the company would start to crumble.”

“Is that true? Is there not, like, a backup plan?” Link asked quietly. 

“I don’t know. I don’t think so. I’m the sole ‘suitable’ heir. There’s no Plan B at any capacity. It’s unwise but I was born and raised for this. My mother wasn’t able to have any more children. There was never anyone but me. As much of a bastard as Father is, he doesn’t trust anyone more than his only child. And I respect that enough to not object to taking over for him. Even though it’s not what I want.” Her mother’s big green eyes and short brown hair flitted along her vision. But Mum had never wanted this for her. And Mum had loved her most. 

Zelda took a deep breath. “We don’t know what their next move is, so it’s important that I’m well prepared and properly protected,” She picked a piece of pepperoni off of her pizza and knawed on it. “Father’s right hand men are considering making Aldrich and I push the wedding back. It’s an ideal party to crash, after all, especially if what they’re looking for is attention. If Zelda Hyrule, the young and wealthy socialite, were assassinated at her own wedding, it would make them and their cause famous. It’s a risk Father hesitates to take.”

Link shrugged. “I agree with him there. If you have a target on your back, your wedding really isn’t a show that has to go on.” She growled, frustrated.

“But halting my life feels like letting them win. I don’t want to shape any part of my routine around them. It feels like an acknowledgement.”

“It would be fucking stupid to not acknowledge them, Zel. They’re a threat to your life and the lives of your family and friends.”

Zelda stared at him, a fire hot lump of-something in her throat. Rage? Tears? The next time anyone was a threat to her family, she’d have them killed. She’d have them mangled and mauled so badly they wouldn’t even look like people anymore. She’d do it herself. She’d relish it. The next time anyone came for her people, her Link, her Sidon, her Mipha, her Daruk, her Revali, her Ladies, the children who woke up screaming in the night as gunshots visited them in their once innocent dreams-she’d strangle them with the train of her wedding dress. She’d beat them until their faces crunched with fragments of fractured skull. 

“I’ll kill them. Every last one,” She whispered fiercely. Her hands shook. Link blanched. “If they come within twenty miles of the Estate ever again, I’ll kill them.”

“Zelda,” He spoke quickly but calmly. “I think your new medicine is make you kind of manic.”

She laughed, pitched and stressed. “It is. But I mean it. If they have the gall to try again I… I don’t know what I’ll do.”

“Go ape shit?” He suggested quietly. She chuckled.

“Probably.”

<>

Link was certainly disturbed by Zelda’s words, but at the same time, he found it difficult to blame her. She spoke with the same fever pitched, murderous intent his traumatized soldiers often had after a particularly rough mission. 

He highly doubted that, unless Zelda was faced with a direct and immediate threat, she’d ever have the capacity to kill. She was terrified of most weaponry (aside from the bows and arrows she used in her favorite athletic hobby, archery) and had cried when Galli had tried to teach her how to use a gun in August. She’d never take pleasure in taking a life. She was still a slave to basic instinct, however. If push came to shove, her fight or flight instinct would kick in, and if he knew anything about her it was that she would fight until she collapsed. Because Zelda was a stubborn, hot-headed little thing that would flat out refuse to die unless Hylia herself called her home. And even then, she’d object.

Zelda had gone mostly silent since she had flown into her mini-rage, arms crossed as she stared at the floor instead of up at the TV. 

“Father’s very upset,” She spoke suddenly, and Link’s head snapped up towards her. He’d been snoozing. “You know, about the whole Free Zelda thing. Thinks I steered people into favoring you. Personally, I think the show was more focused on you in the first place. Aldrich and I aren’t polarizing figures. Compared to you, we’re boring television. They pushed you as a topic, I just said what I thought I should’ve said. You’re my friend, I adore you, we have fun together.”

She brushed at the still fading bruises on her jaw. “And there was really no hiding these. It’s out there, I’m being abused, but the question for them is, by who?” She tilted her head towards the ceiling, as if asking Hylia for an answer. “I hesitate to give them an answer. They may wait forever for one.”

“Do you want people to wait forever? Do you want them to know, ever?”

Zelda regarded him forlornly. “I don’t. And that makes me feel weak.”


	12. zelda's really shitty experiment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> link returns to work without stinky bastard hyrule's permission. zelda has an epiphany and runs a morally grey experiment that results in... things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so. i promised this chapter 2 days ago. and i FINISHED it 2 days ago. but it didnt feel right. so i rewrote it. and this still feels... too tonally different than other chapters? like, link talks a LOT here and his reasoning is given but im not sure if i like it. tell me if its too off and ill tweak it.

“Link is returning to work.” Zelda said firmly, not even bothering to greet her father, but her hands still shook.

Father didn’t even look up from the paperwork he was browsing. “I don’t recall lifting his suspension.”

She approached his desk briskly, pumps clicking against the tile floor, the sharp noise echoing throughout the silent room, far more sure of itself than she was. She leaned into his face, trying her best to sneer. “I know you know I went to Link’s last night. Where are his dismissal papers then, hm?” 

He slid his reading glasses off of his nose, so calm he almost seemed serene. “I thought you’d know the difference between a credible threat and a bluff by now, considering the millions of dollars I funneled into your private business education. It was to teach you both a lesson about the boundaries I expect from him and just a taste of what would happen if he overstepped ever again. I know you don’t have much in the way of self restraint, but at least the Sergeant tried,” He leaned forward onto his elbows, wringing his hands slowly. “I read every one of those letters you sent him. Their contents concern me.”

Zelda swallowed. “How in the world did you get my letters? I sent them off with Sidon hours after I wrote them.”

Father’s eyes were cold and cryptic. “There are people that work for you that are not nearly as loyal to you as you’ve been led to believe.”

The heiress flitted through everyone who had access to her room during the day-laundrymen, the Gerudo girl who brought her breakfast on Sundays, her Ladies, a handful of security personnel, Giselle and Marionne-

Stop the motherfucking music.

“I… Bye.” She mumbled curtly, composure crumbling. She turned on her heel and whirled out of Father’s office (as whirly as she could manage, considering she was wearing skinny jeans and not an evening gown). 

Her two closest ladies had never liked Link and had acted strangely in his presence since day one. She’d dismissed it as them being weirded out by Link’s vaguely magical character-his presence could be unnerving in certain contexts, even to her-he rarely spoke and moved with calculated, silent intent, for Hylia’s sake. If he didn’t announce himself by knocking, it would take several minutes to realize he was in the room. He came off as strange and Gisele and Marionne routinely avoided him like the plague. When they did interact with him, which was only when absolutely necessary, they were snippy and even aggressive. 

Link had always expressed to them that that was unacceptable, pinning his ears back when they raised their voices and scowling darkly at them when they spit out something just passive aggressive enough to be caught after a few moments of tossing the words around in your head. They’d back off for a day or so and then start up again like he’d never chastised them. 

Stupid, stupid. She was fucking stupid. She’d been a direct witness to these back and forths for months and had dismissed them, figuring it wasn’t necessary for her to get involved.

They were observing Link and Zelda and reporting back to Father, weren’t they, those wretched little rats! They held her so tenderly when she cried, cradling her like they intended to protect her from every wrong in the world, and then they scuttled up to Master’s office and spilled their guts. They were trying to get a rise out of Link with their aggression, to give Father a reason to terminate his contract.

She pushed the doors to her room open with her shoulder, and sat on the lounger folding laundry were the devils themselves. 

They greeted her cheerily, and she plastered on her sunniest fake smile. “I need to talk to you both,” She said, a bit too loudly. Gisele and Marionne glanced at each other, then back up at her, slowly putting the laundry in their hands back down. 

“What about, Mistress?” Gisele ventured carefully as Zelda settled into a chair opposite them. 

“Link is returning to work two weeks earlier than expected.” She started, picking cooly at a cuticle.

Marionne’s left eye twitched. “That’s great news.”

“Isn’t it?” Zelda hummed, turning pointedly to Gisele, who nodded hastily. 

“But here’s the thing. It’s been brought to my attention that you both are quite rude to him. Would you agree?”

Marionne’s balled fists tightened. “He’s practically barbaric! He-”

“-Is traumatized and mute,” Zelda cut in sharply. “You cannot take constant offense to his mannerisms. Awkward as they can be, they aren’t inherently offensive. He’s told you to stop in his own way multiple times, surely more than I’ve personally witnessed. I can’t imagine where you got the boldness to insult him in front of me. Now I’m the one telling you to stop, and this time you’re going to listen.”

They both fell silent. 

She continued once she was sure she had their full attention. “Link has sworn not only to protect me, but to protect you and everyone else who has built a life on Estate grounds. He is prepared to die for you and everyone you care about, and you will respect that or I will have you replaced,” Lies, she didn’t have the authority to do that yet. “I understand you find him strange. But he won’t hurt me. He won’t hurt you either. I want you playing nice, because that’s all Link has ever done. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, Mistress.” They sat stone still, save for Gisele twitching with anxiety.

“Good,” She mumbled. “The next time you think to start hurling insults, I want you to consider the shining I’ve taken to Iti and Bella, and what that means for you. Thank you for your time, you may resume your work.”

She stood and disappeared into the sunroom, shutting the door behind her and deflating instantly. Playing stone cold matriarchal CEO was utterly exhausting.

But she wasn’t quite done. She had an… experiment in mind.

<>

Link arrived for work like it was any other day, ears twitching with apprehension. The maid who let him in through the back door looked at him like he was a ghost.

He wasn’t supposed to be here, everyone knew that, and yet he was just going to act like he’d been around for the past two weeks and absolutely nothing was wrong.

He speed walked through the hallways until he got to the lounge, which was practically deserted-it was prime breakfast time. 

Officer Tulain was in, though, sitting under a lamp and reading over some file. He jumped at the sight of Link, who nodded his greetings.

“Jesus. Hey, Sarg. Aren’t you… suspended for another two weeks?” 

Link smirked. “Change of plans,” He whispered in reply. “What’s the schedule for today?”

“Well,” Tulain scrambled for a different paper. “I know Miss Hyrule has another dress fitting at noon. You-well, your substitute, but now I guess it’s you again-you’re on night watch today. You’re also with the juniors this afternoon for some training. And, unofficially, Mrs. Rector is looking for someone to watch her baby for a bit after dinner.”

“Cool. Dismiss my substitute when he comes to clock in. I got this.”

Tulain grunted. “Whatever you say, Sarg.” 

Link rolled his shoulders as he exited the lounge, cringing to himself. Talking to the men under him (or anyone, really) had never been his strong suit, but he hoped making it a semi-normal thing would allow people to view him as less of an enigma who only ever spoke to Zelda. Didn’t make it any less mind-numbingly uncomfortable, though.

The house was lively for seven in the morning, as it always was. A gaggle of Zelda’s maids bustled past him, fresh from the heiress’ bedroom, trays of breakfast food and baskets of laundry under their arms, gossiping to themselves about whatever designer brand Zelda was wearing that day. Flora waved to him quickly as she passed, her uniform’s skirt swishing against his leg. She was smirking.

Link wondered what about. Knowing most of Zelda’s ladies were mischievous personalities at best, probably nothing good. 

He knocked once on Zelda’s door before letting himself in. He startled at the sight of her, sat at her vanity. She was wearing what he recognized to be the underthings she’d picked out to wear with her wedding dress-a lacy white thong and matching bra.

And that was it. 

She was giggling with Bella and Cassy about something as she did her makeup, a huge grin splitting her face as she noticed him. “Good morning, Link! I’m just trying to get ready for my fitting.” He hummed in reply, nodding to Bella and Cassy as he took a seat on the other side of the couch. 

He reverted his eyes, staring at Gisele and Marionne, who were doing laundry on the other side of the room. Bella and Cassy whispered to each other for a moment before getting up to leave in a hurry, saying something about not having had breakfast yet and shouting their goodbyes before they slammed the door. 

But… he’d seen Flora on her way out, carrying trays with the girls’ favorite breakfast: Earl Grey tea for Bella, black coffee for Cassy, and a poppyseed muffin plus two pieces of bacon for them both. He’d eaten breakfast with the ladies and Zelda enough to know their orders, and they knew his (coffee with two creamers and four packets of Splenda, plus a wildberry waffle and honey glazed ham). 

It was just Link, Gisele and Marionne, and a barely clothed Zelda after that. She was humming softly as she did her eyeliner, the line of her body in his peripheral vision.

He crossed his legs and glared at the television. He was a gentleman, for Chrissakes, and he wasn’t going to gawk at her. 

That was, until she stood suddenly. She hadn’t shaved in a couple of days, and the peach fuzz on her miles long legs was just a little too mouthwatering. 

“Darling,” She whined as she approached him, two tubes of lipstick in her hands. “I can’t decide which lipstick to wear. Look at these,” She presented him with a shade of neutral peach-her favorite-and another that was as dark as the red wine that had stained her lips the night before. She sat next to him, her bare stomach rising and falling barely an inch from his elbow. “Which one do you like best?” 

Across the room, Gisele and Marionne were glaring at them. Link could feel their gazes on his face, and he couldn’t focus. She tapped them together, still waiting for an answer, and he blinked. He grabbed the neutral color, and she smiled, satisfied. “That’s what I was thinking. But come here, come. I want to see it next to my dress.” She grabbed him by the arm and tugged him towards her walk-in closet.

Gisele and Marionne’s eyes followed them until they rounded the corner. Zelda’s wedding gown stood on display at the very back of the room, flanked by what had to be millions of dollars of designer clothes, shoes, and bags. A few outfits were strewn haphazardly on a loveseat in the corner-Zelda’s ladies loved to dress her up like their personal Barbie doll, and the heiress in turn loved to let her ladies take whatever they wanted from her closet as a birthday present, or a congratulatory gift for getting a pay raise, or graduating from college. 

She dragged him until he stood next to her in front of the dress. She held the lipstick up to the fabric, and then up to her half done face in the floor to ceiling mirror, scrutinizing. “I think you’ll look perfect,” Link remarked softly, and Zelda smiled at him.

“You think so?”

“You could wear a repurposed potato sack to Paris Fashion Week and I’d still think you’re the most beautiful woman there.” 

She looked up at him through her lashes, turning to drape an arm around his neck, messing idly with the base of his ear. “You’re so sweet.”

He gulped, hyper aware of her brassiere pressing into the cotton of his sweatshirt. She stroked at the sensitive skin in the shell of his ear, and he swallowed a whiny noise. Her grin widened. She was simply embracing him, as she often did, but this time she was in a set of pure white lingerie and nothing else. Usually he’d wrap his arms around her waist and squeeze, but now he didn’t dare touch her. 

Zelda raised herself up onto her tiptoes, resting the bridge of her nose against his jaw and her lips, unmoving, against his pulse point. He placed shaking hands against her hips and they were both quiet and motionless for a moment. 

Then, she kissed his neck, softly. One. Twice. Three times. He gasped, dropping his head to her shoulder, and she giggled. A hand in his hair, tugging on his bun until his head tilted back. She ran her nose along the column of his throat, her giggle turning into a pleased little squeak as Link hitched one of her legs around his waist. “You’re so hot,” She mumbled, snuggling closer. 

“Yeah?” He panted. She still had him by the hair. One of her bra straps was starting to slide off of her shoulder. He couldn’t think.

“Yes. You’re so protective, and handsome, and kind, and I-” He rolled his head until they were gasping into each other’s mouths. She brushed their bottom lips together, and he leaned in and kissed her. 

It was clumsy, Zelda’s inexperience shining through her eagerness, and he was shaking so hard he could barely see properly. They were both a bit too horny, a bit too weird, for it to be anything but messy. 

It was just the sort of filthy makeout that had occupied his dreams for the past few months. 

Until Zelda broke the kiss and turned towards the door. “I fucking knew it,” She hissed, pushing away from him and stalking towards Gisele, who had been standing in the doorway for Hylia knows how long. She grabbed the other girl by the collar, practically throttling her until Gisele was shrieking and her necklace had snapped off in Zelda’s fist. 

“Come,” She spoke over her shoulder sharply, and Link was at her side like an eager dog. She cracked the heart shaped locket open to reveal a tangle of tiny wires and metal parts. “It’s a camera.” 

Zelda’s face crumpled as she stared at her cupped hands, diamond tears slipping down her ruddy cheeks. “This is a thousand dollar necklace. I bought this for you for your sixteenth birthday. And you turned it into spyware. How could you do this to me?” 

Gisele stared at the floor, face hard. “The money he offered was too good of a deal. I have bills.”

“If you had told me you were struggling, I would have reached into my own pockets time and time again. I’ve told you that, you know that!” The heiress’ shoulders shuddered, her sobs loud and betrayed. She turned into Link’s chest, and he held her there.

Bella and Iti were suddenly rushing in, their mistress’ cries being the ultimate distress call. “God, what happened?” Bella gasped.

Link wrestled the necklace out of Zelda’s clenched fist to show to the two. “Hidden camera. She’s been spying.” 

Bella took the necklace gently, peering in at the crushed lense. “Gisele. How could you? How dare you?” 

Gisele had no answer.

Iti’s lower lip trembled. “She’s around mistress all the time, when she’s undressed, when she’s bathing-” This seemed to be the first time Zelda realized this as well, her shuddering sobs growing louder. “There’s gotta be months of sensitive footage on that thing.”

“Bella,” Link muttered, gesturing her closer. “I need you to check all the other girls’ jewelry, please. Marionne especially. Get some of my boys and girls to help you.” Bella nodded, shaken but determined, and swished out of the room. 

He handed Zelda off to Iti, and the maid immediately started stroking hair and cooing comfort. He knelt down to where Gisele had been pushed to the floor, grabbing the woman’s arm. “You’re a security threat. I should beat the everloving shit out of you for what you’ve done, and trust me, I want to,” He whispered, taking twisted pleasure in the way her eyes widened with fear. “Get the fuck out of here. Don’t come back until Zelda says you can. If I find out you’re still fucking around on her after this, you’re dead meat.” He let go of her arm and she scampered out of the room like a rat released from a trap. 

“Iti, um, can you get her dressed? Maybe get her another bath? I gotta-I gotta go call the guys. The people.” He was completely nonsensical, but Iti nodded with such confidence that he didn’t doubt her understanding.

<>

Iti ran soft hands through Zelda’s hair, and she sank lower into the tub. “I can wash myself, you know.”

The girl hummed. “I know. But it’s nice to be pampered, especially when you’re hurting.” 

Zelda went under to wash the soap out, and when she surfaced, Iti was removing all her jewelry-bracelets, earrings, necklaces. She offered them to Zelda, who just stared.

“What.”

Iti laughed. “Go ahead, dunk ‘em in the water and give ‘em a good once-over.”

She lightly smacked her lady’s wrist, and she dumped all of it into the water between Zelda’s legs. None of them sparked, or shorted out, or anything. 

“All good, yeah?”

“Yes.”

They were both quiet for a moment. “How did you find out?” Iti asked softly.

Zelda huffed. “Father said something about how not everyone is as loyal to me as I’ve been led to believe. I started-I started thinking about who could possibly do such a thing. Gisele and Marionne, they’ve been so weird about Link. It just clicked. I got suspicious, and decided I’d run an experiment. I got Link alone, got handsy, and-and there she was at the doorway.”

The maid paused. “Did you kiss him?”

She hummed. “Yeah.” 

Iti slowly resumed washing Zelda’s shoulders and neck. “You’re… strangely blasé about this. Your first kiss. It being with Master Link.”

“It didn’t really mean anything.”

“Does he know that? He’s gonna want to talk when we get all this sorted.”

“No, because he was a variable that had to be clueless in order for the results of the experiment to come out unbiased. In order for the most pure results, only one of us should be in the know.”

Iti frowned deeply, looking years older than she was in her scorn. “That's an excellent scientific procedure, Mistress, but it wasn’t very humane of you. I don’t think he read the room the same way you did.” 

Zelda was suddenly hit with second thoughts far too late. “I’d like to think you’re underestimating his intelligence. He knew something was up as soon as he walked in the room.”

“Yes, but that doesn’t mean a kiss wouldn’t mean something to him. He adores you, that’s obvious. And he doesn’t seem like the type to take kindly to being used as an unknowing lab rat. Not to mention, Zelda-” She startled at the use of her name. It wasn’t that her ladies weren’t allowed to use it, they just preferred to be more formal. Rather, that’s how Father preferred it. Iti leaned in to whisper. “-You just cheated on your fiancé.” 

The heiress scoffed, rising out of the bath and reaching for a towel. “Aldrich doesn’t care.”

“Really? He’s told you that after you discussed it?”

“N-No. But he hinted at it.” 

“What did the older girls always talk about when we were kids, Zelda? We require explicit consent to carry out actions against others. This was rash on multiple levels.”

Iti was right, as she usually was. Nevertheless, Zelda ignored her. “Can you give my dress a once-over, please? Those jewels are so delicate, I wouldn’t be surprised if a few had come loose.” 

Iti scoffed, but said nothing more. 

<>

The girls were bitchy about getting their jewelry confiscated, as many pieces were borrowed or gifts from Zelda, but they cooperated. They sulked to each other and gave him a wide berth, when usually they’d be asking him all sorts of questions, making all sorts of comments, hanging off of his arms. He must look fucking furious. Bella sidled up next to him, eyes scanning cooly across the room. The Korean girl was one of Zelda’s favorites, and he had been tempted to follow his instincts about her and dismiss suspicion of her involvement at all. He was rather fond of her as well. She was a sweetheart. 

“I think it was just Gisele and Marionne. Everyone else is just confused and annoyed.” 

“They need to relax. They’ve been told it’s important and it’s not coming out of their paycheck,” Link muttered in reply. “As far as Mr. Hyrule knows, they’re all working their normal routine.” 

“Can we keep up that façade? He’s the CEO.”

“Dunno. But some other bitch here has Zelda’s nudes. So. Don’t really care.” He shrugged. 

She smirked, crossing her arms. “You jealous?”

He glared at her sharply.

“Too soon?”

“In bad taste.”

“Oh well. But seriously. I’m worried. If Gisele was bringing those tapes straight to Master Hyrule, who knows who else she showed them to? I bet there’s some serious dirt on that flash drive.” 

“She’s already in enough trouble as it is.”

“Mhm.”

Across the room, Marionne hesitated for several seconds before dropping her bracelet in the bucket of water provided. It short circuited and then exploded.

“There’s our girl!” Link announced loudly, preening as his voice stayed steady. He startled more than a few women, and Marionne stiffened. “Spying on Miss Hyrule for some quick cash. I should beat your ass. It’s in my job description, after all,” He proclaimed as he walked ever closer, aiming for threatening and even potentially violent. He stopped only inches from her. She didn’t even take a step back. “Get the fuck out.”

She spit in his face. The other girls gasped. He wiped it off, rubbing the saliva between his thumb and forefinger. “God, it’s practically caustic. Like acid. I can feel my skin burning.” 

“Fuck you.” Marionne hissed. 

“No, fuck you. How people like you exist in the same space as someone as lovely as Miss Hyrule without shriveling up and dying is beyond me,” His voice was raising, and he could hear and feel some of the girls getting antsy. He didn’t talk at a normal volume, if at all, let alone yell. “She’s her own woman, and you can’t even exist as an independent entity without leeching off of her. It’s fucking pathetic.” 

“You don’t know anything about me!” Marionne shrieked.

“I know that I’ve witnessed Zelda offer you money every time you even so much as breathed a word of complaint about your rent, or your sick mom’s hospital bills. To refuse that money, saying you want to be independent, and then go behind her back like you did? You’re fucking deranged. And you need to get out. You need to go.”

“Fuck you!”

“Go or I’ll shoot you. I swear to God.” 

Bella put a hand on his shoulder. “Sarg. Let’s… let’s calm down, okay? No shooting, no being shot,” She turned soft eyes to Marionne. “Mari, you’re not welcome here right now. You should go. I’ll make sure you get paid for your shift.” 

“Fuck you, Bella. You’re a fucking class traitor.”

“So is Zelda. She always has been. You know that.”

Marionne stared at her, unmoving, before turning and slamming the door shut behind her. 

Galli was at his side too. “Um, ladies, as you could probably guess, Gisele and Marionne have been using cameras hidden in jewelry to spy on Miss Hyrule. This is a critical breach of security and privacy, and we would very much appreciate it if you reported any suspicious articles of clothing or activity to your superiors immediately. That is all. Continue with your day.” 

The girls filed out, whispering to each other. 

Galli clapped him on the back. “You, uh, overdid it.”

“She’s a flaming bitch.” He muttered back.

“Yeah. But you scared the shit out of everyone and now we’ve lost the power of subtly in our investigation.” 

“Cool. Cool cool cool.”

“No. Uncool.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oooooooh things are heating the fuck up..
> 
> i love zelda shes my darling babe but from what we've seen in botw shes pretty type a and thinks mostly in scientifics.. using her first kiss for an experiment and unintentionally fucking with peoples emotions in the name of that experiment is something she 100% would do
> 
> ps if ur a kpop stan like myself and are wondering, yes i did model and name bella after bella from elris. because shes the love of my life. thanks

**Author's Note:**

> kind comments, suggestions and constructive criticism are welcome and strongly encouraged!!


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